Why the Sports Guy rules

Shakiest Coach of the Weekend: Brian Billick. Along with offensive coordinator Matt Cavanaugh, it took them three-and-a-half quarters to realize they should be throwing deep downfield to Todd Heap. Really? It took them that long to figure out that their All-Pro tight end might be able to run by the safeties when they were cheating up to stop Jamal Lewis ... which was only every play? Don't these people play video games? It's the oldest trick in the book! Even early Intellivision had that play (9-4-2-8?).

I can beat the vast majority of gamers at Maddens, from 1992 to 1996 on Genesis, then 1999 to 2004 on PSX and PS/2. But I scoff at anyone who would even dream of taking me on in the brutal endurance test that is Intellivision football - 15-minute quarters baby, the real 15 minutes, none of this latter-day speed-stuff-up nonsense. I played that game by myself for hours, months on end. The only game at which I'm better is US Ski Team Skiiing. Still, the Sports Guy just might give me a game.

Always good to see a fellow fan of the Gold Disc and the Thumb of Power. You know that modern game controllers descend from the Gold Disc, right? Atari 2600 joysticks - pah!

(For those of you experiencing momentary paradigm shift, please be informed that for eight years, I designed, produced and reviewed video and computer games.)