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Wednesday, July 18, 2012

The Sports Guy was right

Women ruin everything. Everything. This is why women have to be ruthlessly kept out of places to which their sex have neither created nor contributed anything. In most such cases, literally the only thing women truly care about accomplishing is adding more women.
Co-producer Philippa Boyens addressed some changes made for the movie adaptation, especially the addition of a new character or two, something that could be seen as heresy by the literary community or Tolkien fans. Boyens said the story felt weighed down by males, so they created a female elf, being played by Evangeline Lilly and seen briefly in the footage.

“We created her to bring that feminine energy,” Boyens said. “We believe it’s completely within the spirit of Tolkien. We didn’t want her to be a ploy.”
What. The. Fuck? Tolkien's novels are a masterpiece. A classic. They define a genre. So Philippa Fucking Boyens decides she can improve upon them by adding a female character to do what, discuss tampons and boy bands? Does Tokenlass spend her screen time regaling the dwarves with tedious gossip about elves that none of them have ever met? Does she have sex with Borin before making a hypergamous upgrade to Thorin, then demanding that the dwarves replace their battleaxes and warhammers with lighter ones that she can carry?

The problem with Jackson's LOTR trilogy wasn't the omission of Tom Bombadil but the addition of the idiotic dialogue invented by Boyens; HBO's adaptation of A Game of Thrones is much superior due to the fact that Martin himself is being used to create the additional dialogue required by the new medium. Now, I'll still watch The Hobbit when it comes out. Like The Lord of the Rings, the source material is too good to be ruined by the "contributions" of Ms Boyens's script. But it's unsurprising that the Tolkien estate is less than ecstatic about Jackson's films, which fortunately means there will be future films that will be conceived and advertised as being more faithful to Tolkien's text instead of presenting the Ms Magazine version of them.

Anyhow, to Hell with Boyens, her feminine energy, and her fear of an excessively male story.

Labels:

196 Comments:

Anonymous VryeDenker July 18, 2012 7:19 AM  

If they want women in the LOTR universe so badly, why not make The Silmarillion. There's lots of strong female characters in there. Yavanna and Luthien come to mind. Ungoliant was also a "woman" ;)

Anonymous Megabozz July 18, 2012 7:25 AM  

Wasn't Twilight enough for them? There weren't any men in that one.

Anonymous Mark July 18, 2012 7:32 AM  

That's just wrong.

Blogger Markku July 18, 2012 7:35 AM  

So Philippa Fucking Boyens decides she can improve upon them by adding a female to do what, discuss tampons and boy bands?

To do everything as good as boys, only moar betterer.

Anonymous RevRighteous July 18, 2012 7:39 AM  

Some more eveidence of modern women's litterary "contributions" to classic tales:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2174576/Classics-given-50-Shades-Grey-makeover-make-Jane-Austen-blush.html
Apparently Tolkin isn't the only author who's work lacked that vital feminine energy. At least the filmakes didn't go the route these writers went with 20000 Legues and instead of adding females they just invented homosexual affairs for the characters

Anonymous Roundtine July 18, 2012 7:40 AM  

Drudge has a link about death threats to critical reviewers of Nolan's Batman 3. Rotten Tomatoes shut down comments and they said they were worried about the Hobbit later this year. Now I know why. This fuses fanboy rage with the manosphere. God help them if 4chan gets involved.

Anonymous Houston July 18, 2012 7:41 AM  

Solipsism again. "There's not enough ME in this story." But audiences would laugh at a sword wielding dirigible yelling with a Kiwi accent, so Boyens expresses this vicariously through the she-elf.

Anonymous Koanic July 18, 2012 7:43 AM  

It seems Dante omitted a circle of Hell, conveniently foreshadowed by A Clockwork Orange.

Anonymous anon123 July 18, 2012 7:47 AM  

Well,it IS Evangeline Lilly, after all. Maybe she could play an Elf stripper or porn star.

Anonymous Luke July 18, 2012 7:48 AM  

VryeDenker, I found The Silmarillion to be a crashing bore, more a collection of names than anything else. It was comparable IMO to the Bible section of innumerable "begats".

That said, I agree 100% with Vox's original post, saving only his view of the significance of the omission of Tom Bombadil from Jackson's LOTR movies. Without Bombadil, the hobbits/barrow wights interaction (where the hobbits acquire a Westernesse sword) can't be, and without it, the Lord of the Nazgul can't be damaged by a hobbit backstab in front of Minas Tirith. Major plot hole there...

Anonymous FUBAR Nation (Ben) July 18, 2012 7:53 AM  

Jackson added stuff into the LOTR movies. What do you expect? Political correctness, aka cultural Marxism, has to ruin everything. How many TV shows are there where the main character is an unrealistic woman who regularly takes down huge male characters with ease? This stuff shouldn't surprise anyone. Adding women to this is just like blacks complaining that there aren't enough blacks in the fantasy genre.

What's next, a gay dwarf?

This fiasco reminds me of Lucas completely destroying his franchise by making it kid friendly. At least Ridley Scott has succeeded in rebooting the alien franchise with Prometheus.

Anonymous Koanic July 18, 2012 7:55 AM  

I hate the fact that I know exactly what that cunt means by "bring that feminine energy," and will do.

A man does something glorious, and a woman jumps into the spotlight for some crashingly gauche self-validating narcissism, poisoning everyone's catharsis.

Hammer and tongs, hot irons and pincers, endless prison rape!

Anonymous The Great Martini July 18, 2012 7:56 AM  

Time to throw some sulfuric acid in the faces of those darn women.

Anonymous Koanic July 18, 2012 7:58 AM  

And anyone who doesn't appreciate Tom Bombadil and the Silmarillion is a Cro-Magnon a couple hundred cc's shy of the capacity to recognize beauty.

Anonymous VD July 18, 2012 8:04 AM  

Time to throw some sulfuric acid in the faces of those darn women.

What is Boyens doing if not throwing sulfuric acid over Tolkein's text? Do you support that?

Blogger Gilbert Ratchet July 18, 2012 8:05 AM  

"This is why women have to be ruthlessly kept out of places to which their sex have neither created nor contributed anything. In most such cases, literally the only thing women truly care about accomplishing is adding more women."

True, dat:

http://news.nationalpost.com/2012/07/18/yahoos-new-ceo-hailed-for-smashing-glass-ceiling-by-starting-job-pregnant/

Anonymous The Great Martini July 18, 2012 8:12 AM  

What is Boyens doing if not throwing sulfuric acid over Tolkein's text? Do you support that?

Oh come off it. It's friggin fantasy novel. You're the one talking about barring women "ruthlessly." Take a foking Valium and call me in the morning. The endgame of mutilating literature is...mutilated literature. The endgame of radical patriarchy is...mutilated women.

Anonymous VryeDenker July 18, 2012 8:15 AM  

Luke, I can appreciate that you found that The Silmarillion might be boring, but the number of epic battles would make for some great cinema. An entire continent breaks apart near the end, for instance. There's also the duel with Morgoth and the tale of Beren and Luthien. There's more than enough in there for two great films.

Anonymous the abe July 18, 2012 8:17 AM  

The endgame of mutilating literature is...mutilated literature. The endgame of radical patriarchy is...mutilated women. -The Great Cosmopolitan

Either way, the end justifies the means.

Anonymous Logan July 18, 2012 8:17 AM  

I wish I could ask Ms. Boyens the following question:

How exactly is bringing feminine energy within the spirit of Tolkien, considering Tolkien saw fit to exclude female characters from the book?

Here's another question: How exactly does she determine what is in the spirit of Tolkien and what isn't?

They created the female character "to bring that feminine energy." I know what I'm going to do, I'm going to create my own movie adaptation of the book, and I'm going to include new characters of my own. I think I'll have Antonio Banderas in the movie playing himself, "to bring that Latino energy." I'll have a couple actors play Socrates and Plato "to bring that ancient Greek philosopher energy." Because I love science, I'll have Stephen Hawking in the movie "to bring that wheelchair-bound physicist energy."

It's all totally within the spirit of Tolkien. Because I say it is.

Anonymous Luke July 18, 2012 8:20 AM  

TG Martini wrote:

"The endgame of radical patriarchy is...mutilated women."

Incorrect. Try replacing your last two words in that sentence with something more akin to "continuing Western Civilization/avoiding reversion to social structures of the Neolithic" (easily observed today in the Congo, Haiti, and Harlem).

http://fisheaters.com/garbagegeneration.html

http://www.thornwalker.com/ditch/devlin_home_ec_01.htm

http://www.newamerica.net/publications/articles/2006/the_return_of_patriarchy

Anonymous Logan July 18, 2012 8:22 AM  

While I'm here, good morning to the Ilk. I do so love this blog.

Anonymous VD July 18, 2012 8:23 AM  

Oh come off it. It's friggin fantasy novel. You're the one talking about barring women "ruthlessly."

Stop evading and answer the question. And there is no need to be such a drama queen. It wasn't necessary to throw acid in anyone's face to prevent a misandric idiot, and one with zero screenplay credits according to Wikipedia, from being permitted to butcher Tolkein's text.

Anonymous VD July 18, 2012 8:28 AM  

True, dat

That's actually a bad example. Marissa Mayer is not the usual token woman, she contributed greatly to Google's success. I find it interesting that as one of the highest of the corporate high-fliers, she's still managed to marry and procreate. Of course, she's no bitter hag either.

And let's face it, she can't screw up Yahoo worse than any of the previous CEOs. It wouldn't surprise me if she was surprisingly successful there.

Anonymous Wendy July 18, 2012 8:28 AM  

As I could only stand to watch the LOTR films if I considered them completely different movies from the books, so it will be with the Hobbit. I'm purposefully putting off rereading it until after I see the movie.

They originally had toyed with idea of Arwen being at Helm's Deep too, but changed that after a huge uproar from fans. As it was, they still had to doing too much.

Yes, women ruin everything. Thankfully Tolkien Estate still owns the rights to everything Silmarillion and are very touchy about it, so that can't be ruined.

Anonymous VryeDenker July 18, 2012 8:28 AM  

If she doesn't like LOTR, why not make her own fantasy movie? It can't be that hard to write an epic, right? I mean, even old white men could do it.

Anonymous VryeDenker July 18, 2012 8:35 AM  

There's a saying: never meet your heroes. I'll make another: never watch the movie if you enjoyed the book.

Anonymous Wendy July 18, 2012 8:35 AM  

How exactly is bringing feminine energy within the spirit of Tolkien, considering Tolkien saw fit to exclude female characters from the book?

Tolkien did not exclude female characters. He used them sensibly. Arwen wouldn't travel alone considering what happened to Celebrian, but she is an important character because she holds to hope rather than despair. Then there's Eowyn and Galadriel. I don't think anyone could say they aren't strong characters.

Anonymous paradox July 18, 2012 8:36 AM  

Now this is the reason for mass murder. Jackson's version of the Two Towers was butchered up with fake Arwin crap, pro-preemptive war propaganda* and some weird arse story tangent with a missing Aragorn. I almost didn't watch the The Return of the King because of it.


*An Orc suicide-bomber and dialog.

Anonymous rubbermallet July 18, 2012 8:37 AM  

i don't think its possible to make a Simarillion movie. too many stories. i think the story of turin turambar would make an amazing movie.

Anonymous Grinder July 18, 2012 8:41 AM  

Tolkien's books bored me and LOTR movies were laughable. I hate literature/movies with superheroes, jedis, vulcans, vampires and elves as if they are so superior to everyone else. Why wouldn't everyone wish they could be one since they are depicted as being so great? It just spoils what would otherwise be potentially decent works. It's just weak and only suitable for children. Didn't Tolkien include unicorns in his works?

Blogger IM2L844 July 18, 2012 8:47 AM  

What's next, adding some double D's and labium to Virtruvian Man or the Statue of David?

Literary works of fiction are no less art than any other medium.

Anonymous Stickwick July 18, 2012 8:50 AM  

While checking out the cast list for The Hobbit on IMDb last week, I see this Tauriel character, and was thinking, who the hell is that?! The explanation is about as bad as I expected.

In the DVD extras, Boyens flaps her big yap about the changes she made to the LotR for the movies, and it makes me want to get a restraining order forbidding any woman from interfering with a traditionally all-male story. Two women screenwriters for the LotR, and that's why it's not as good as the screenplay for Bakshi's much more masculine version. Boyens and Walsh feminized almost all of the characters, they mostly missed the point of the story, and they added unnecessary elements of soggy "drama" with boring Arwen where they weren't needed. Worst of all, they gave Frodo's big shining moment to freaking Arwen at the Ford of Bruinen. That still pisses me off. I wonder how they're going to screw up The Hobbit.

Count me as a woman who enjoys the all-male vibe in certain movies. John Carpenter's The Thing, for instance, is a masterpiece of tone and suspense, and it would have been completely ruined by introducing a female character. The new remake was an instant non-classic because they not only introduced a female into the story, but made her the lead character. It just doesn't work for certain stories, and it also shows a profound disrespect for the original material. Here's an idea. Somebody should hire a man to pen the next adaptation of Pride and Prejudice and introduce a boisterous brother into the Bennett family. A household with five sisters could really use more male energy, after all.

Anonymous VryeDenker July 18, 2012 8:53 AM  

Ayn Rand was rather good at depicting the alpha male. But then, she didn't burn her bra in the 60's.

Anonymous Stickwick July 18, 2012 8:55 AM  

Grinder,

You not only have no soul, you have utterly missed the point of those characters and stories.

Blogger Markku July 18, 2012 8:58 AM  

You not only have no soul, you have utterly missed the point of those characters and stories.

Well, he has previously stated that only National Socialism can save us. Something tells me there is a connection.

Anonymous Stickwick July 18, 2012 9:04 AM  

Then there's Eowyn and Galadriel. I don't think anyone could say they aren't strong characters.

Not as written by Tolkien. But it's telling that Boyens and Walsh couldn't even write the bonafide female characters right. They made Eowyn into a pitiful girl-woman, Arwen into a weepy mope, and Galadriel into a robotic hippy chick. They inserted this horrible Aragorn-Arwen subplot and didn't bother to develop the wonderful Faramir-Eowyn love story. ???

Anonymous Wendy July 18, 2012 9:07 AM  

What's next, adding some double D's and labium to Virtruvian Man or the Statue of David?

Misogynist. They must be B cup or smaller. Anything larger objectifies women.

/s

Anonymous Wendy July 18, 2012 9:09 AM  

Stickwick, I completely agree. And I hate what they did to the characters of Sam and Faramir.

Anonymous Anonymous July 18, 2012 9:11 AM  

MTV - Make The Virus!

Anonymous Josh July 18, 2012 9:14 AM  

Grinder...again, you're an utter fool...

Anonymous JartStar July 18, 2012 9:17 AM  

During the commentary to one of the movies a female writer made the point that they wrote Gollum like they did because there is no real good or bad. Considering that the Tolkien's work is all about good and evil I realized that they had no clue of what they were doing or talking about. Frankly I'm surprised the movies were as good as they were with this gang of clowns trying to shovel 21sth century progressivism into the dialogue.

Anonymous Grinder July 18, 2012 9:20 AM  

The point seemed to be that us poor humans need to rely on a race of superior beings in order to save us. It's softly paving the way for acceptance of the vanguard of multiculturalist marxist socialism (international cosmopolitan jews) to lead us into what they consider the way in which we should live because they have powers that we don't have and so we should trust them.
I am recently a fan of The Walking Dead where the power comes from the ground up and ordinary men and women push themselves to the limit to secure survival for one more day against the undead hordes. It is becoming more and more analogous to reality with each passing month.

Anonymous Grinder July 18, 2012 9:22 AM  

JoshJuly 18, 2012 9:14 AM
Grinder...again, you're an utter fool...


Josh, why do you waste time making such pointless remarks? We can already see that you never learned manners. Your mama was evidently too busy knocking back dicks for dimes to teach you. You have my pity. Satisfied?

Anonymous Seriously... July 18, 2012 9:24 AM  

Wow, this is one giant nerd battle.

Anonymous Wendy July 18, 2012 9:27 AM  

The point seemed to be that us poor humans need to rely on a race of superior beings in order to save us.

Obviously you have never read Tolkien.

Anonymous Stickwick July 18, 2012 9:28 AM  

The point seemed to be that us poor humans need to rely on a race of superior beings in order to save us.

I didn't think it was possible to be this obtuse. Did you somehow miss the climax of the LotR? Spoiler alert: Frodo and Sam save the day. The lowliest characters in the story are pivotal to all of the events. By the end of the Third Age, men ascend to become the dominant race of Middle Earth.

Anonymous Grinder July 18, 2012 9:33 AM  

I have the trilogy in one volume but I couldn't make it out of the fellowship because it never engaged me. I do recall it was a wonder cure for insomnia. So I guess it gets better in two towers? Sure.

Anonymous Josh July 18, 2012 9:33 AM  

Wow, grinder, you completely missed the point of lotr...

The hobbits are the most humble and ordinary of all the peoples of middle earth...it was a hobbit, not a great wizard, elf, or dwarf, that destroyed the ring. A humble, quiet, unassuming hobbit.

Like I said...you're a moron

Anonymous Orion July 18, 2012 9:35 AM  

Listen Mz. Martini and Mz Grinder, the problem is similar to putting battle scenes into one a movie base on one of your favorite books. Say Ann of Greengables. It adds NOTHING for all of the fans of the book. As was suggested above, write your own heroine flick and call it something else. Earn some fans/viewers on your own merit.

Anonymous Josh July 18, 2012 9:37 AM  

Dude, having aliens invade avonlea would be totally awesome...

Anonymous TLM July 18, 2012 9:40 AM  

You're correct. Although Goodfellas was a great movie, it covered only a small portion of all the s*it that happened in Henry Hills life. I read his book, Wiseguys, while stationed at Ft Bragg a few years before the movie came out. Hill was running some briillant scams with local restaurants right off post and excess chow hall food. Went awol and all kinds of other stuff that just couldnt be squeezed into a 2 hour film.

Anonymous The other skeptic July 18, 2012 9:41 AM  

It doesn't matter. I don't plan on seeing it, and neither should any of you. Most of what comes out of Hollywood is crap anyway.

Blogger Hermit July 18, 2012 9:44 AM  

"VryeDenker, I found The Silmarillion to be a crashing bore, more a collection of names than anything else. It was comparable IMO to the Bible section of innumerable "begats"."

Did you make it to the first chapter? It took me three tries (over a course of about 3 years, I've got a lot going on) to just get to the Valaquenta and on into the first chapter. It becomes much less of a slog after that, and I'm quite enjoying it.

Anonymous Poot Gibson July 18, 2012 9:44 AM  

In all fairness to women, I haven't had one screw-up the backwards cowboy...yet.

Anonymous Vidad July 18, 2012 9:44 AM  

@ Josh

No. That would be wrong and bad. Totally wrongbad.

@ Everyone in F$%&ing Hollywood

F%$# you. I'll stick with my books.

Anonymous Cheddarman July 18, 2012 9:49 AM  

Are there any good Viking sagas out there that could be made into a film?

I did not see the one about Beowulf, as it looked retarded.

and Grinder, the world in Lord of the Rings was saved by the courage of Hobbits...think about it...

Anonymous stg58 July 18, 2012 9:49 AM  

I think it would have been awesome to have Gandalf summon a platoon of Abrams tanks to cut through the orc lines at the battle for Minas Tirith. That would be more defensible than Boyens' "contribution".

Few things infuriate me more than the literary version of 1984's newspeak. Women are marxists at their core. It is up to men to contain this destructive force.

Anonymous VD July 18, 2012 9:49 AM  

The point seemed to be that us poor humans need to rely on a race of superior beings in order to save us.

You completely failed to grasp the point then. I suggest re-reading them, assuming you ever read them in the first place. It is the great who are helpless to do much more than avoid succumbing to the evil. Note that Saruman the White, the most powerful member of the most powerful race, falls into despair, while the humble Sam, the least of the least, does not.

Anonymous MendoScot July 18, 2012 9:57 AM  

Wendy July 18, 2012 9:27 AM

The point seemed to be that us poor humans need to rely on a race of superior beings in order to save us.


Obviously you have never read Tolkien.

It's not that he hasn't read Tolkein, it's that he didn't understand Tolkein.

Anonymous jack July 18, 2012 9:57 AM  

I think I will vote on this female's attempt to rewrite Tolkien by NOT seeing this movie.

I think I know now why none of the Dragon Rider series was ever made into a movie. McCaffrey probably look and saw and said, 'You're not doing that to my books.'
Now, whether her estate will bow to mammon remains to be seen...

Anonymous jack July 18, 2012 9:59 AM  

Opps: E before I Tolkein.

Anonymous Viking July 18, 2012 9:59 AM  

I would guess that she would have also seen most of "Band of Brothers" as weighed down by males. Be it in fact or in fiction, sometimes men do what they do so women don't have to. Funny though, it is almost always only on the fiction side that women show up for glory of combat and other such distasteful things.

Anonymous Stickwick July 18, 2012 10:00 AM  

Are there any good Viking sagas out there that could be made into a film?

The single greatest Viking movie of our time has already been made. You'll be amazed by its authenticity.

Anonymous Josh July 18, 2012 10:01 AM  

Only tolkien would make a gardener the hero

Anonymous scoobius dubious July 18, 2012 10:02 AM  

"Wow, this is one giant nerd battle."

No, THIS is a nerd battle! Hit it, boys:

"Now once upon a time
An old man told me a fable
When the piper is gone,
And the soup is cold on your table..."

It gets a whole lot nuttier after that...

I always thought the whole Tom Bombadil bit was one of the best parts of LOTR: you just didn't see it coming, and the whole tone of Tom is so refreshingly original, as opposed to the usual glowering villains and wise wizards and what-not. Tolkien is the best iteration of all that, but Bombadil was truly a different level. (The Ents were hilarious, too, and I thought the movies didn't do them so great.) I also loved that Tolkien constantly had the nerve to bring the whole story to a grinding halt so somebody could sing the praises of bathtubs, or chant some weird ballad about characters who don't matter, and so on. That took guts, and it's part of what makes the thing really come alive.

Does anybody know if Jackson shot the Bombadil stuff and then cut it later?, or did they decide at the start to just leave him out. I'm curious who would have played him. I suppose my vote would be for either Steve Martin, or Paul McCartney.

Calling all nerds! Who are your Bombadil casting choices?

Blogger Markku July 18, 2012 10:02 AM  

Not to mention that the elves leave in the end, leaving Middle Earth to humans. If there is to be an analogy to superior beings, it would be angels who are currently superior to us, but whom we will eventually judge.

Anonymous stg58 July 18, 2012 10:06 AM  

Hank Azaria is Tom Bombadil.

Blogger Markku July 18, 2012 10:09 AM  

Does anybody know if Jackson shot the Bombadil stuff and then cut it later?, or did they decide at the start to just leave him out.

It was never shot. The extras reveal that they soon figured out from the storyboards that everything couldn't fit into a single movie per book, so they come up with a principle: The movies are about the passage of the ring from Shire to Mordor (a deliberate deviation from the books). Anything not relevant to that is out. This included Bombadil.

Anonymous Houston July 18, 2012 10:09 AM  

Stickwick writes: "Boyens and Walsh feminized almost all of the characters..."

Indeed. The most obvious casualty was the film version of Aragorn, tormented by self-doubt and reluctant to assume the full responsibility of kingship. This is classic feminine emotional instability and risk avoidance. Aragorn's weaknesses in the book are decidedly masculine. The moist poignant of these, which he confessed to the hobbits in Bree, was weariness at being lonely (as a hunted heir to the throne) and the resulting temptation to let down his guard.

Anonymous scoobius dubious July 18, 2012 10:12 AM  

Jackie Chan, or Sammo Hung, would have been a great Bombadil too. Worst possible choice: Robin Williams.

Me, I'm gonna skip the Hobbit and wait (probably in vain) for a great multi-part adaptation of The Once and Future King.

To all those of you who were bored and/or irritated by Tolkien: check out the hilarious Finn MacCool/Sweeney sequences in Flann O'Brien's twisted masterpiece, "At Swim-Two-Birds" -- possibly the funniest book ever written. Probably un-filmable, but I'd pay to see even a bad version.

Anonymous cherub's revenge July 18, 2012 10:15 AM  

Ayn Rand was rather good at depicting the alpha male. But then, she didn't burn her bra in the 60's.

Ayn Rand was all of the anti-family, sexual revolution, autonomous feminist leftism one could find on any college campus of the 60s, just with a stock exchange veneer both in her writing and her personal life.

Just another dead end philosophy peddled by the peddliest peddlers who ever schlepped.

Anonymous The One July 18, 2012 10:20 AM  

THEY CROSSED THE LINE!!!

Blogger W.LindsayWheeler July 18, 2012 10:24 AM  

In ancient Greek literature, a lot of evil was based in women. It was Pandora, a woman, that released evil into the world. All female witches were evil. Men were portrayed as both good and evil.

What the ancient Greeks naturally saw, is that women/females destroy men. For a very masculine society, women are dangerous.

Anonymous Josh July 18, 2012 10:24 AM  

THEY CROSSED THE LINE!!!

YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous Stilicho July 18, 2012 10:33 AM  

There's a saying: never meet your heroes.

Not always true. I met Col. Ripley a few times. The man was 10 feet all. At least. Pretty amazing for an old Marine who was shy of 72 inches and probably weighed a buck sixty soaking wet. 10. Feet. Tall.

Anonymous MendoScot July 18, 2012 10:33 AM  

For the hard-core fans (or those who simply enjoy lays) I'd recommend The Legend of Sigurd and Gudrun, which he wrote prior to LoTR. You can see a lot of the elements and structure that showed up in the story.

Anonymous Stickwick July 18, 2012 10:36 AM  

The most obvious casualty was the film version of Aragorn ...

I agree that Aragorn was horribly feminized, but I thought the most obvious casualty was Frodo. In the book, Frodo is made of quite stern stuff, as opposed to the whiny Ring zombie he was in the movies. Take, for instance, how he (albeit foolishly) resisted the Black Riders on Weathertop. In the movie, he drops his sword and squirms on his back like a frightened worm. In the book, he has a glorious shining moment at the Ford of Bruinen. Here's this tiny little nobody from nowhere in the face of great evil, mortally wounded, and yet he defies this evil with the last of his strength. It's a pivotal moment that reveals who he really is. That Boyens and Walsh gave this moment to stupid Arwen is UNFORGIVABLE. They sacrifice this moment on the altar of Grrrrl Power! and squander the one moment that truly shows what's so extraordinary about Hobbits. Also, I detested the bitchy little moments he had with Sam in the movies, particularly over Smeagol. "Why do you do that? Call him names, run him down all the time?" ARGH!!! Men don't get along like that, women do.

Anonymous Houston July 18, 2012 10:41 AM  

Come to think of it, yes, Frodo did come off the worst at the hands of the coven. Compared to the character in the book, the film version is a cowardly, treacherous, unheroic little git.

Anonymous Kickass July 18, 2012 10:43 AM  

Tommy B is amazing. Plus he and his wife had traditional gender roles. I would have had Russell Crowe play him.

Anonymous P July 18, 2012 10:44 AM  

Sadly a large chunk the fans of the book will probably be okay with this.(unless the filmmakers completely wreck it) As my wife pointed out the filmmakers will likely just hollow out other characters by re-distributing parts into the female elf. In that way some fans can justify that Jackson remained "true to the spirit" of the book.

Of course I'm as guilty as anyone since I am likely to see the Hobbit films. I guess I'll take a watered down version over nothing.

Grinder: I have to add something about Unicorns, which have been subject to derision. Sure, they are completely cheesy today but if you can suffer a trip to the wretched NYC go to the Cloisters Museum. You may appreciate that Unicorns are central to the tapestries. Also Raphael famously painted one and you'll find them in many old coats of arms. So back to Vox's original point, women have even ruined unicorns.

Anonymous Stilicho July 18, 2012 10:44 AM  

Me, I'm gonna skip the Hobbit and wait (probably in vain) for a great multi-part adaptation of The Once and Future King.

Oh Scooby, Camelot, the musical part 2 is the most likely result. With Lancelot as a brooding vampire, Mordred as a racist white bigot, and a riveting scene where Galahad comes out of the closet before prancing off for brunch and mimosas with Merlin.

Anonymous Jimmy July 18, 2012 10:47 AM  

"What's next, a gay dwarf?"

Aren't the Hobbits gay? That's what some viewers of LOTR thought.

Blogger JDC July 18, 2012 10:51 AM  

Quote from Cheddarman: Are there any good Viking sagas out there that could be made into a film?

THIS is the best Viking Film every made.

Anonymous Noah B. July 18, 2012 11:08 AM  

I was disappointed in the omission of Tom Bombadil in the movies, but the omission that I haven't been able to forgive is Sauron's taking over of the Shire and the Hobbits' fight to recapture it. It always seemed anti-climactic, but thematically, it's such a critical element that it should not have been omitted.

Anonymous Clay July 18, 2012 11:08 AM  

Though I wouldn't call it the "best" Viking film, I always enjoy watching The 13th Warrior, based on Crichton's book, Eaters Of The Dead...which is, of course, loosely based upon Beowulf.

Anonymous Other Josh July 18, 2012 11:14 AM  

Wow. This really got Vox fired up.

Blogger Markku July 18, 2012 11:18 AM  

Aren't the Hobbits gay? That's what some viewers of LOTR thought.

This is really a major reason why homosexualism is so morally repugnant; It sexualises philia between men, to the point where men avoid it just so that the other wouldn't think him gay.

When the modern reader reads about David and Jonathan in the Old Testament, he immediately thinks of buggery.

Blogger JDC July 18, 2012 11:35 AM  

Excellent point Markku (it happens sometimes I know). Eros and philia - buggery versus brotherly love. We can love our brothers without wanting to shave our legs and take long showers with them.

Anonymous rubbermallet July 18, 2012 11:44 AM  

"Tolkien is stupid. super heros or anyone superior to humans saving the day is a bad story"

"Umm in this saga, anyone with super human powers (wizards, elves, etc) fails miserably. its the normal everyday nobody's that actually save the day"

"oh well..then...um....I didn't actually read them because the are booooorrrring"

Ahh I see. When does junior high registration start?

Anonymous The Anti-Gnostic July 18, 2012 11:45 AM  

but the omission that I haven't been able to forgive is Sauron's taking over of the Shire and the Hobbits' fight to recapture it. It always seemed anti-climactic, but thematically, it's such a critical element that it should not have been omitted.

It was Saruman, and the Scouring of the Shire. And yes, it's omission was HUGE. ("Ah shit!") I remember thinking at that point in the movie when Legolas kills Saruman at Isengard.

Anonymous rubbermallet July 18, 2012 11:50 AM  

i still dream of a day where they come out with the super extended version where tom and the scourging scenes exist. some day perhaps. SOMEDAY.

Anonymous Josh July 18, 2012 12:05 PM  

The scourging scene can't work in a movie

Anonymous kh123 July 18, 2012 12:05 PM  

Note from the underground: One more example of women in charge in the entertainment industry...

Company F has been hired to house world famous Company M production for the past 2 years. Company M has now moved on to their own building and started self-production on one series. M asks F to send over M-property assets (designs, artwork) done while at F, so as not to have to start from scratch.

M owns designs, yet female executive producer from F gets into argument with exec from M; "You don't own these; we're not going to give them up".

M exec: "We'll never f***ing work with you again, that's for damned sure."

Keep in mind, Company F would have needed M in order to to continue having projects, source of revenue, etc. F has been on the decline for the past few years, and is planning on ending another (unrelated) money-making production which has arguably had the longest run in television history. Now they've doubly shot themselves in the foot by losing any potential projects from M (there are several in the works).

One of the many levels of craziness from the women that have run productions there.

Blogger WATYF July 18, 2012 12:06 PM  

Vox, Vox.... I think you might be overreacting here. It's entirely possible that they only threw the female elf character in because female elves are.... well.... hot. And everyone knows it.

As long as she just stands there and looks pretty, what harm does it do? :^D

WATYF

Anonymous Daniel July 18, 2012 12:07 PM  

Film is a crummy medium for getting things right, but sometimes it can get things good. Letting girls into a man's book obviously provided annoyances, but the core story has so much...bottle...that it survives.

The stupid thing about the girlification of formerly male parts of the LOTR [Arwen defying the Nazgul, Gimli's stony, alien nature confused for bombast and goofiness, Saruman getting shoved] is that it robs the film of the book's major expression of feminine virtue and valor: Eowyn's encounter with the Witch King.

Neither an Amazon nor political equal nor (literally - by necessity of the text) a man, Eowyn's character is a shocking light in the book, but an echo in the movie: Legolas' skateboard with a better girl on it.

Despite all those flaws, LOTR, and, I anticipate, the Hobbit films, are extremely fine films in their own right, and a decent enough reflection of the books.

Can they be done better? I believe so, and hope they will be. Could they be worse? Uh, yes. See also The Seeker: The Dark is Rising Bicentennial Man, Hitchhiker's Guide and the semi-recent The Time Machine

Anonymous kh123 July 18, 2012 12:10 PM  

...Keep in mind, M still has on-going projects at Studio F, slated to wrap up at the end of the year. The exec from M still has an office there.

Anonymous Josh July 18, 2012 12:20 PM  

At least they didn't change it to river journey...

Blogger ajw308 July 18, 2012 12:33 PM  

What's next, a re-release of Saving Private Ryan with female troops landing on Normandy? Not because they were there, but they could have been, you know. /Sarcasm

Blogger ajw308 July 18, 2012 12:35 PM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger ajw308 July 18, 2012 12:35 PM  

I hit publish once. I swear it.

Anonymous Suomynona July 18, 2012 12:44 PM  

You might want to leave a comment on Peter Jackson's FB account. He keeps it current.

Distorting and twisting reality, facts, history and the truth to align with leftist ideals, aka political correctness, is de rigueur. One should hardly be surprised that a work of fiction would succumb at the hands of the entertainment industry. The majority of the power and influence in Western Civilization are allowed only to those who bow to PC. The world is changed... and it seriously sucks.

The LOTR movies were a monumental effort over a span of several years. In this respect alone, they were brilliant. Boyens is a fewhale from New Zealand. I doubt she has ever encountered a leftist ideal, nor a doughnut, that she could reject. These parasites take the things of substance and value, and remake them in their own image. They're too spiritually stunted to create anything worthwhile themselves. It's an old story.

Blogger ajw308 July 18, 2012 12:50 PM  

Tom Bombadil, I was very disappointed he was cut out.

As to who I'd like to see play him, a young Clint Eastwood or maybe the versatile Tom Hanks, or the equally versatile, but unrecognized Fred Ward.

Blogger LP 999/Eliza July 18, 2012 12:55 PM  

Women do ruin everything:

The boy scouts, the covents (lol), female OBGYN's, female drivers and female shoppers are on my list of (all good people) females who sometimes cause me trouble.

I cannot listen or watch female anchors. Only RT.com has women who speak and dress properly. Meaning they don't throw their voices, inflect in a high pitch manner or drink at 10 am like cathy gifford. Come to think of it, I am so tired of looking at the rejects of SNL that seem to appear in everything on NBC.

Anonymous Mike M. July 18, 2012 1:00 PM  

It's annoying. Just about any film adaption of a book will need editing just to get the length affordable. As a rule of thumb, one page of book is one minute of film - meaning that LOTR done as written would run about 15 hours. Six films, not three.

But it's the editing that counts. What Peter Jackson did to "The Fellowship of the Ring" I could stomach. Frankly, that book is rather slow-starting, and getting the hobbits to Bree fast is essential to the story. What he did to the next two books was rather less satisfactory.

A writing team faced with an editing job needs to bear in mind that people are paying to see a film adaption of the original author's work, not the script-writer's notions of how he could make it "better". Which requires a generous helping of humility.

And there are some stories that just don't involve women. Hollywood is fond of shoving romantic interests into just about every story line, and the reality is that this just doesn't work with some genres. Not well, and not without some FAR smarter writing than Hollywood can boast.

Blogger LP 999/Eliza July 18, 2012 1:01 PM  

But on the other hand SB, my mom, aunt, Beatrice and countless other women (here) are sensible and ever patient with idiots like me.

Anonymous Mike M. July 18, 2012 1:01 PM  

That being said, women don't ruin everything. Not even sports. You can't have ladies figure skating wihtout them. :-)

Blogger LP 999/Eliza July 18, 2012 1:02 PM  

We know she doesn't even understand Tolkien's vision.

Anonymous Ugh July 18, 2012 1:07 PM  

That Boyens and Walsh gave this moment to stupid Arwen is UNFORGIVABLE. They sacrifice this moment on the altar of Grrrrl Power! and squander the one moment that truly shows what's so extraordinary about Hobbits.

The most HORRIBLE aspect of it was the awful, awful dialogue --

"Give up the halfling, she-elf!"
"If you want him, come and get him."

Oh Lord, who wrote that shat, a 13-year old D&D player?

it robs the film of the book's major expression of feminine virtue and valor: Eowyn's encounter with the Witch King.

Which reminds me, the killing of the Witch King in the movie was appalling -- because they right away cut to the scene of "Legolas doing something cool." WTF??? Hello, Eowyn actually just did something important...

In general, the worst parts of the movies were when they strayed from the book. Don't expect The Hobbit to be any different.

Blogger Markku July 18, 2012 1:09 PM  

Six films, not three.

Incidentally, LOTR is six books, artificially combined as two in one because it was cheaper to publish that way. Now, of course, it is popular enough that it could be published in its original form, but people are already used to it as a trilogy.

Anonymous Scintan July 18, 2012 1:11 PM  

While I agree that the motivation behind the changes is an asinine one, the reality is that movies really can't stay 100% faithful to books, as a general rule. The difference in the 2 mediums makes it so, regardless of the desires of the filmmakers. Changes here and there have been happening in film since the beginning, and will continue to happen. That doesn't make the movies bad. LOTR was a solid series of movies, and I look forward to the Hobbit movies with anticipation, with the understanding that they will not remain fully true to the source.

Hell, the feminists butchered the hell out of Mansfield Park.

Blogger Markku July 18, 2012 1:13 PM  

Oh Lord, who wrote that shat, a 13-year old D&D player?

somethingawful's LOTR on the Go made much of the dialogue more appropriate.

Blogger Markku July 18, 2012 1:16 PM  

While I agree that the motivation behind the changes is an asinine one, the reality is that movies really can't stay 100% faithful to books, as a general rule.

No reasonable person would disagree with such changes as some of the Treebeard's dialogue happening in the wrong location in order to condense the events. But there is no excuse for adding characters because the original lacks girl power, or adding anachronistic events.

Anonymous Problem? July 18, 2012 1:25 PM  

Do you know what "The Old man and the Sea" didn't have enough of? Women fisherpeople.

Anonymous NewAnubis July 18, 2012 1:31 PM  

Ain't nuttin' sacred no-mo. The PC nonsense seeping its way into virtually everything that will be mass-comsumed has this viewer on the cusp of Ralphing.

Slightly OT- I could about 15 minutes of Political Animals that I mistakenly tuned into last night. Within the 15 minutes, sure enough the F sec of state has a son who was 'brave' enough to come out of the closet while dear old dad was president but apparently the onslaught was too much and he attempts suicide. Additionally, there are 2 protagonists it appears, both women in high, high places and making minced meat of their co-working numbskull men. Then, naturally, a young hottie climbing the newsroom ladder by climbing the newsroom boss...

Beam me up, Scotty.

Blogger GX3Blogger July 18, 2012 1:33 PM  

As long as they don't destroy Beorn's character. If they make him feel bad about killing Orcs or Goblins, I'll have to punch a baby.

Anonymous Suomynona July 18, 2012 1:35 PM  

I agree that women will always attempt to change everything to suit themselves - resulting in a weakened, substandard, if not downright ridiculous, form of the original. BUT, somewhere along the line in all this female meddling, is a man who has allowed her to get away with it. I very much doubt that Boyens has the last word in everything she writes. Jackson is the director. His name always appears first in the credits. He certainly had to approve of this concocted character.

Instead of you guys going after women - for being women, perhaps your ire would be less futile if it were directed at these men - for not being men.

Anonymous JCclimber July 18, 2012 1:39 PM  

Makes me wonder about who is wrecking the Disney versions of the Narnia series. Disney is full of crap these days. Grrrllll power in every single movie they make. Even their theme parks have gone too far from their origins.

Aragorn, a seriously brave and butt-kicking man's man turned into a vacillating smitten man-boy.
Faramir turned into a self-doubting man instead of the serious butt-kicker that he was in the original (yet with the scholarly side).
Frodo, robbed of his bravery at Weathertop, at the Fords, recovering from a spear thrust in Moria, confronting Boromir, mastering Gollum, and his implacable drive to get to Mordor, all robbed from him.
Sam, turned into a crybaby to some degree.
Gimli, comic relief.
Legolas, a 1,000 year old prince of elves turned into boy-band girl bait.
Glorfindel, a brave and ancient elf lord cut completely to create grlll power Arwen.
The whole Eowyn/Aragorn thing.
Elrond, who was a herald at the battle to end the Second Age, becomes the main general.
Celeborn, a serious king of elves, worthy equal to Galadriel, turned into a beta boy with a brain turned to mush by drugs or something.
No offense to Galadriel, she is a butt-kicker too, but that was a King Queen partnership.

All of this was completely

Anonymous Daniel July 18, 2012 1:43 PM  

At least they didn't change it to river journey...

That's true. George R.R. Martin did a brutal adaptation of himself.

Anonymous ENthePeasant July 18, 2012 1:48 PM  

There's a little sight called Action Figure Therapy that I've grown to love. It's geared to men with a military theme. They do videos like this.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gmIe6zzOqcg&feature=player_embedded

Recently they decided to add some "feminine energy"... or negativity if you prefer.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVeNi7bfmrI&feature=relmfu

Yes, women ruin everything.

Anonymous JCclimber July 18, 2012 1:49 PM  

.....completely cut off. Nice.

As a young man, one of the things I enjoyed about the movies "Taps" and "Lords of Discipline", to the point of discussing it with friends after seeing the movie, was that they were great movies without any serious female characters.

To some degree, The Hobbit was a children's book from the beginning and intended to be less serious.

I shudder to think of what they'll do to the story of Beorn.

Anonymous Scintan July 18, 2012 1:59 PM  

No reasonable person would disagree with such changes as some of the Treebeard's dialogue happening in the wrong location in order to condense the events. But there is no excuse for adding characters because the original lacks girl power, or adding anachronistic events.

Of course there is. You and I may hate the changes, but they are attempts to both increase female viewership and add in the writer's personal slant, which is part of almost every take on another's work. Both happen all the time, and have happened from the beginning of cinema.

Anonymous Clay July 18, 2012 2:00 PM  

JCclimber July 18, 2012 1:49 PM .....completely cut off. Nice.

As a young man, one of the things I enjoyed about the movies "Taps" and "Lords of Discipline", to the point of discussing it with friends after seeing the movie, was that they were great movies without any serious female characters.


If they were to remake those films today, it would have to be "Taps That Ass", and "She-Men of Discipline".

Anonymous ENthePeasant July 18, 2012 2:00 PM  

I loved AFT. It was a complete man sight. How can anyone not love the Angry Ranger when he speaks a soldiers truth?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WyTVkD0w--E&feature=relmfu

What could "feminine energy" possibly bring to this? It's maddening beyond reason.

Anonymous Stickwick July 18, 2012 2:02 PM  

But there is no excuse for adding characters because the original lacks girl power, or adding anachronistic events.

Or committing character rape or meddling with the overall point of the story. For all of the fun people make of Bakshi's version, he did actually manage to avoid all of those errors. Baskhi spent considerable time on the material and consulted with Tolkien's daughter in order to get the right feel for the movie. He also hired a noted male fantasy author to pen the screenplay (Peter S. Beagle).

Anonymous Stilicho July 18, 2012 2:05 PM  

As long as they don't destroy Beorn's character. If they make him feel bad about killing Orcs or Goblins, I'll have to punch a baby.

You mean Beorna, the she-bear, earth-mother vegan?

Anonymous Noah B. July 18, 2012 2:15 PM  

"It was Saruman, and the Scouring of the Shire. And yes, it's omission was HUGE. ("Ah shit!") I remember thinking at that point in the movie when Legolas kills Saruman at Isengard."

Yes it was Saruman, thanks for catching that.

It's just more of the same old crap from the left -- the message that people must remain vigilant to secure their own freedom must be suppressed. The individual must bow to the collective.

Anonymous scoobius dubious July 18, 2012 2:19 PM  

Well, don't know about the rest of you, but I'm looking forward to the new Disney flick:

"Snow White and the Four Dwarves, Two Black Guys, and an Asian Kick-Ass Martial-Arts Princess"

Blogger GX3Blogger July 18, 2012 2:54 PM  

As long as they don't destroy Beorn's character. If they make him feel bad about killing Orcs or Goblins, I'll have to punch a baby.

You mean Beorna, the she-bear, earth-mother vegan?

Exactly!

Blogger Beefy Levinson July 18, 2012 2:57 PM  

Title IX, Middle Earth style!

I can't say I'm surprised about this. Consider Faramir: in the books he's easily one of the strongest male characters in the whole trilogy, a real man's man. For the movies he was transformed into a whiny my-daddy-doesn't-love-me Oprah style headcase who tries to take the Ring back to Gondor before letting Frodo and Sam continue on their way. Philippa Boyens said in the DVD commentary that these changes were made to Faramir's character because she just didn't understand him the way he was portrayed in the books.

Anonymous jerry July 18, 2012 3:09 PM  

It's worse than anyone imagined. From IMDB:

She is a warrior and the head of the Elven guard. She knows how to wield any weapon, but the primary weapons that she uses are a bow and arrow and two daggers. She is described as lethal and deadly.

Anonymous jerry July 18, 2012 3:30 PM  

Oh, God, she's also a love interest for Kili.

Anonymous VD July 18, 2012 3:33 PM  

Philippa Boyens said in the DVD commentary that these changes were made to Faramir's character because she just didn't understand him the way he was portrayed in the books.

What a stupid bitch. He was my favorite character in the book too.

Anonymous VD July 18, 2012 3:39 PM  

She is a warrior and the head of the Elven guard

The Elven guard? What Elven guard, the Lothern Seaguard? These stupid women can't even put stories together that rise to the level of Warhammer and they're revising Tolkien?

What an asshole Jackson has turned out to be.

Anonymous Koanic July 18, 2012 3:58 PM  

"You mean Beorna, the she-bear, earth-mother vegan?"

Part of me died when I read that.

Vox always picks the obscure competent guys, like Faramir or the random pilot in the battle of Hoth. I guess he just doesn't have enough issues to make an interesting lead.

Anonymous Koanic July 18, 2012 4:02 PM  

The irony here is that it is precisely the post Saruman scouring Shire society that debases Tolkein's epic in the very spirit he describes. The ugliness of the factories invades even the art that rebelled against it, at long last.

Anonymous JCclimber July 18, 2012 4:05 PM  

Shouldn't Legolas or one of his brothers be head of Thranduil's guard?

I think her admission that she didn't understand Faramir, speaks volumes. His was the character I could most identify with (as a younger brother) when I first read the series.

A man's man. Who admired and respected his older brother. Who also related well to Mithrandir. Who took his father's disregard as blow, yet took it in stride. Who was an admired and respected leader of the people of Gondor, brave and an excellent war leader, just not as fierce and martial as Boromir.

Disgusting what they did to him and other characters. I agree with the sentiment about Jackson. Yet the movies still rock hard, and are a testament to the superior quality of the source material provided by Tolkien.

Anonymous Feh July 18, 2012 4:07 PM  

Since Elves are imaginary, let's just imagine that female Elves are just male Elves with less body hair! Or is it that the male Elves are female Elves with more hair? But wait, even the male Elves don't really have much body hair, do they?

That does it, I'm writing my own fanfic in which Sauron wins and turns all the candy-ass Elves into Orcs!

Anonymous Eh July 18, 2012 4:09 PM  

Boromir = Sonny
Faramir = Fredo

Gotta be another brother around somewhere...

Anonymous jerry July 18, 2012 4:16 PM  

Boyens is the luckiest person in showbiz. She graduates from University of Auckland with a BA in English and teaches for a year while writing a little bit for theater.

A year later her writing partner gets asked to join Jackson and Walsh for this cool project shooting in New Zealand and he invites Philippa to come along. Her partner later bows out of the picture because of other obligations leaving Philippa and Walsh as the principle writers.

A few years later she has an oscar and a 3 billion dollar grossing franchise.

No wonder she thinks grrrls rule!

Anonymous Suomynona July 18, 2012 4:16 PM  

Feh July 18, 2012 4:07 PM
That does it, I'm writing my own fanfic in which Sauron wins and turns all the candy-ass Elves into Orcs!


Tolkien beat you to it. From The Silmarillion:

Yet this is held true by the wise of Eressëa, that all those of the Quendi [elves] who came into the hands of Melkor, ere Utumno was broken, were put there in prison, and by slow arts of cruelty were corrupted and enslaved; and thus did Melkor breed the hideous race of the Orcs in envy and mockery of the Elves, of whom they were afterwards the bitterest foes."

And deep in their dark hearts the Orcs loathed the Master whom they served in fear, the maker only of their misery. This it may be was the vilest deed of Melkor, and the most hateful to Ilúvatar.

Anonymous Stickwick July 18, 2012 4:22 PM  

Philippa Boyens said in the DVD commentary that these changes were made to Faramir's character because she just didn't understand him the way he was portrayed in the books.

A man's man. Who admired and respected his older brother. Who also related well to Mithrandir. Who took his father's disregard as blow, yet took it in stride. Who was an admired and respected leader of the people of Gondor, brave and an excellent war leader, just not as fierce and martial as Boromir.

JCclimber summed up Faramir perfectly -- what's not to understand? Anyway, there were two other writers -- she couldn't have deferred to someone who did understand him?

Turn this around and image the outrage: a male screenwriter rewrites Jane Bennett to be a laudanum-addicted slut, because he just didn't understand her as she was portrayed in Pride and Prejudice.

Anonymous George July 18, 2012 4:25 PM  

Get a grip!

Nothing wrong with a business trying to attract a broader audience.

Anonymous Johno July 18, 2012 4:32 PM  

And so it begins...

http://cheezburger.com/6437378048

Anonymous FUBAR Nation (Ben) July 18, 2012 4:49 PM  

This is on par with Lucas destroying the star wars franchise.

Feminism needs to be mocked out of existence. For it to destroy movies like this is the last straw.

Anonymous Noah B. July 18, 2012 4:53 PM  

"Philippa Boyens said in the DVD commentary that these changes were made to Faramir's character because she just didn't understand him the way he was portrayed in the books.

What a stupid bitch. He was my favorite character in the book too."

There again, this was a major an unacceptable change, because not only was Faramir one of the most likeable characters, he symbolized the future of mankind. I understand if they want to add some T&A, but don't go messing with Tolkien's themes.

Anonymous Noah B. July 18, 2012 4:54 PM  

Sounds like yet another movie I'll be watching from TPB.se.

Anonymous Stilicho July 18, 2012 5:02 PM  

I may just have to root for Smaug. Especially if he is portrayed as an angry white capitalist, robbing the working dwarf.

Anonymous Stilicho July 18, 2012 5:04 PM  

Perhaps I'll write "Smoke and Mirrors: a dragon's tale" in the spirit of Bored of the Rings.

Anonymous Feh July 18, 2012 5:28 PM  

Tolkien beat you to it.

Yeah yeah yeah, I get that's where Orcs come from. There was even a reference to that in the movie.

What I mean is a LOTR in which Sauron wins, long after the original creation of the Elves. Which should have been obvious, since that's what I said in the first place.

Anonymous TheExpat July 18, 2012 5:30 PM  

Tom Bombadil, I was very disappointed he was cut out.

For you.

Anonymous Noah B. July 18, 2012 5:42 PM  

"What I mean is a LOTR in which Sauron wins..."

Why do we need that when we already have reality?

Anonymous Koanic July 18, 2012 5:48 PM  

Everybody loves Faramir. Whatta guy. An oiled-up comatose prop with questionable lineage.

It's the racist rebel riders of Rohan for me. Yee-ha, throw another orc on the barbie. Dwarf, halfling, what's the difference?

Anonymous Feh July 18, 2012 5:52 PM  

Why do we need that when we already have reality?

Coz chicks dig the sissy-boy Elves so much!

Blogger papabear July 18, 2012 5:56 PM  

Is there a link between being a geek and pedestalizing? Peter Jackson, Quentin Tarantino, Joss Whedon...

Anonymous ENthePeasant July 18, 2012 6:04 PM  

"changes were made to Faramir's character because she just didn't understand him the way he was portrayed in the books."

How could anyone, but a moron, be confused about him? What she really meant to say is she despised him for his fidelity to his father and family and new he was everything she will never be... and therefore must be destroyed.

Anonymous Suomynona July 18, 2012 6:08 PM  

What I mean is a LOTR in which Sauron wins, long after the original creation of the Elves. Which should have been obvious, since that's what I said in the first place.

Restating it won't change the fact that your general plot is unoriginal, hence the immediate association to the history of Middle Earth.

Anonymous DT July 18, 2012 6:15 PM  

"Is there a link between being a geek and pedestalizing? Peter Jackson, Quentin Tarantino, Joss Whedon..."

Yes. Generally speaking, geeks fail to see through female BS. They do not understand the true nature of women. They believe it when women tell them that all women are sweet, innocent, princess angels, equal to men only better, filled with mystical grrrl power. So naturally they put women up on pedestals.

Anonymous realmatt July 18, 2012 6:50 PM  

The only feminine energy needed is tits.

Tits or gtfo.

Anonymous JRL July 18, 2012 6:57 PM  

Fark!

Anonymous JRL July 18, 2012 7:07 PM  

“We created her to bring that feminine energy,”



She means feminist energy.

Evangeline will have cute hair.

Anonymous Godfrey July 18, 2012 7:16 PM  

Secular culture is so predictable and boring... yawn.

Anonymous Emperor of Icecream July 18, 2012 7:33 PM  

Good golly. Feminism and Hollywood--two terrible tastes that taste terrible together.

Master and Commander is a great movie 100% free of grrrl power taint.

Anonymous kh123 July 18, 2012 8:03 PM  

First the destruction of Mountains of Madness with the release of Brometheus. And now, there's not enough Barton Fink feel, so they go and throw in v.2.0 heroines.

All the more motivation to leave the media/literary Egypt behind and to do your own thing.

Anonymous paradox July 18, 2012 8:17 PM  

Hopefully as technology advances and movie making becomes more decentralized, Hollywood will become more irrelevant and fade into oblivion.

Anonymous Tom B July 18, 2012 9:01 PM  

"Since Elves are imaginary, let's just imagine that female Elves are just male Elves with less body hair!"


Sorry, but I cannot imagine Evangeline Lilly as a male....

Anonymous Wendy July 18, 2012 9:25 PM  

Turn this around and image the outrage: a male screenwriter rewrites Jane Bennett to be a laudanum-addicted slut, because he just didn't understand her as she was portrayed in Pride and Prejudice.

It's entirely possible that Boyens wouldn't understand Jane as portrayed. Perhaps Lydia...

Anonymous Wendy July 18, 2012 9:26 PM  

Well, I'm hoping down the road the remakes will be better.

Blogger Duke of Earl July 18, 2012 10:32 PM  

Then there's Eowyn and Galadriel. I don't think anyone could say they aren't strong characters.

Not as written by Tolkien. But it's telling that Boyens and Walsh couldn't even write the bonafide female characters right. They made Eowyn into a pitiful girl-woman, Arwen into a weepy mope, and Galadriel into a robotic hippy chick. They inserted this horrible Aragorn-Arwen subplot and didn't bother to develop the wonderful Faramir-Eowyn love story. ???


I watched the Two Towers recently and was struck by the contrast between book Eowyn and movie Eowyn, in the book she unveils in the face of certain death, fearless before unspeakable terror. In the movie she pulls off her helm just in time to crow as she slams her sword into a kneeling enemy. It's not the same vibe at all.

Anonymous Stickwick July 18, 2012 10:47 PM  

It's entirely possible that Boyens wouldn't understand Jane as portrayed. Perhaps Lydia...

In that Lydia was two-dimensional, immature, and irritating, you're probably right.

I watched the Two Towers recently and was struck by the contrast between book Eowyn and movie Eowyn ...

I think you meant The Return of the King, but, yeah. As dopey as it was, the animated version of RotK did this scene better.

Anonymous Stickwick July 18, 2012 10:54 PM  

Here's the superior Eowyn scene from the Rankin-Bass version of RotK. I don't wanna hear nothin' about how goofy this is or how crappy the animation is. The spirit of this moment is much truer to the book than Jackson's version.

Blogger Duke of Earl July 18, 2012 11:01 PM  

I think you meant The Return of the King, but, yeah. As dopey as it was, the animated version of RotK did this scene better.

D'Oh!

I can only plead that I watched both back to back and got confused.

Jason

Anonymous The CronoLink July 18, 2012 11:16 PM  

"Sorry, but I cannot imagine Evangeline Lilly as a male...."

It ain't that hard with such an androgynous example.

Anonymous kh123 July 18, 2012 11:39 PM  

"...or how crappy the animation is."

Actually, considering how detailed the character designs are, it's not bad at all, for the few parts where they have to rely on animation cycles to drag out a scene (the rest looks fairly posed and acted out).

I assume a good deal of the character designs and key framing were done in Japan.

Anonymous kh123 July 18, 2012 11:45 PM  

...and the voice of Casey Kasem for one of the hobbits. Classic.

Anonymous physphilmusic July 19, 2012 12:11 AM  

That's actually a bad example. Marissa Mayer is not the usual token woman, she contributed greatly to Google's success. I find it interesting that as one of the highest of the corporate high-fliers, she's still managed to marry and procreate.

As much as I agree with you about Mayer's geek cred, I find it mildly surprising that you seem hint approval at her decision to procreate. Won't her children end up spending most of their childhood in daycare?

Anonymous Stickwick July 19, 2012 12:47 AM  

kh123,

It often happens that when I bring up classic hand-drawn animation, it gets denigrated by the CGI-luvin' crowd. I agree with you, the animation is actually not bad. The only weak link in the character design was Gollum, who was inexplicably made to look like a frog.

If you think Casey Kasem as a hobbit is classic, recall that Orson Bean and Roddy McDowall played Frodo and Sam, respectively.

I will leave you all with this gem, for which you will curse me, because you'll never get it out of your heads.

Blogger Doom July 19, 2012 2:20 AM  

Women are the mother of "minority". Go figure.

Anonymous Bobo July 19, 2012 5:59 AM  

“We created her to bring that feminine energy,” Boyens said.

This reeks of new age-y, pagan goddess worship. Meanwhile Tolkien was a Christian and his trilogy reflects that and not pagan ideas.

Anonymous Bobo July 19, 2012 6:02 AM  

I assume a good deal of the character designs and key framing were done in Japan.

Probably outsourced to South Korean and HK companies from there.

Anonymous Bobo July 19, 2012 6:08 AM  

"Is there a link between being a geek and pedestalizing? Peter Jackson, Quentin Tarantino, Joss Whedon..."

Tarantino is probably just copying Japanese anime in his Kill Bill series. He wanted a joshikousei (jk) assasin, that would be ample reason - and all anime have them for fan service only, except for Miyazaki, but the latter does not attribute any super feminine powers to his heroines.

Anonymous Houston July 19, 2012 7:54 AM  

In the book, Faramir's greatest moment is when he learns that Frodo has the Ring of Power but reassures him that he would not take this thing if it were lying by the side of the road. Boyens admits in the DVD commentary that this behavior is believable in the book, but claims it would be "death" if depicted on screen. She says Faramir's easy refusal of temptation would negate the "desperate trying" of the screenwriters and director to convey the evil nature of the Ring. No, what it negates is her pagan, feminine perspective that denies the power of grace (e.g., the divinely granted strength to serve God rather than self) and cannot comprehend masculine self-control.

Anonymous Jeigh Di July 19, 2012 7:57 AM  

"Philippa Boyens said in the DVD commentary that these changes were made to Faramir's character because she just didn't understand him the way he was portrayed in the books."

"What a stupid bitch. He was my favorite character in the book too."

He was what Boromir should have been.

Anonymous Jeigh Di July 19, 2012 8:00 AM  

I think that in any movie the producer feels obliged to pee on the script. They think it tastes better.

Anonymous Jeigh Di July 19, 2012 8:35 AM  

The Broken Sword by Poul Anderson would make an interesting movie if a proper adaptation could be written, and next to impossible to feminize.

I can't remember the title of (IMO) the best viking movie, but it starred Kirk Douglas and Tony Curtis. The late Ernest Borgnine played their father.

Anonymous Matthew2323 July 19, 2012 9:13 AM  

Is everything sad going to come untrue? Ask Jason Gray

Anonymous It's the time for divine feminism July 19, 2012 10:04 AM  

Didn't Tempest's Prospero got a sex-change last year? Or did that woman play the part as a a man? Considering how Irene Adler was recently turned into a lesbian dominatrix, this is pretty childish stuff.

Anonymous Kickass July 19, 2012 11:05 AM  

I dont know about him being a Christian, maybe. But he clearly said that wasnt a Christian series in the interview I read. Christians, rather churchians, christianize everything. Even Harry Potter and stupid twilight. I expect to see a Bible study, written by a man no less, based on fifty shades of grey. Remember that I called it first

Anonymous bob k. mando July 19, 2012 12:24 PM  

Markku July 18, 2012 7:35 AM
To do everything as good as boys, only moar betterer.




Eowyn killed the Witch King of Angmar. something that "no Man" could do and that was prophesied that "no Man" could do.

how much 'more betterer' do you need?




Luke July 18, 2012 7:48 AM
VryeDenker, I found The Silmarillion to be a crashing bore, more a collection of names than anything else. It was comparable IMO to the Bible section of innumerable "begats".


the first two books of the Silmarillion are dreadfully tedious slogging. it picks up quite from the Quenta Silmarillion onwards.

if you're having trouble with it, it's probably just best to skip Ainulindalë and Valaquenta altogether.



Logan July 18, 2012 8:17 AM
I wish I could ask Ms. Boyens the following question:
How exactly is bringing feminine energy within the spirit of Tolkien, considering Tolkien saw fit to exclude female characters from the book?


Tolkien did NO SUCH THING. there are DOZENS of major female characters in his works. if you count the Silmarillion it wouldn't surprise me if you're well over 100.

the fact that his women weren't multi-time practitioners of abortion who had transitioned to a Dorito Night for Lesbian Bed Death couples does NOT mean that "Tolkien saw fit to exclude female characters from the book" or that he did not portray ( a ) "feminine energy".




Grinder July 18, 2012 9:20 AM
The point seemed to be that us poor humans need to rely on a race of superior beings in order to save us.




you dumbass.

the WHOLE POINT of the LOTR is that ALL the mighty ( whitey ) men of war, the mages, the massed armies, the machinery of destruction, the fantastical beasts were useless.

the ONLY thing that mattered was the destruction of the Ring. and the ONLY ones capable of destroying the Ring were ... a couple of little midgets.

even in the window dressing Battle of Minis Tirith ( whose only function in the book is TOO KEEP SAURON DISTRACTED ), all the glory ( the defeat of the leader of the Nazgul ) gets stolen by a woman ( Eowyn ) and a midget ( Merry ).

your miscomprehension of what is going on in there is so complete that there is virtually no common ground available for anyone to communicate too you.




kh123 July 18, 2012 12:05 PM
One of the many levels of craziness from the women that have run productions there.



check out the actions of Teresa Earnhardt vs Junior. she destroyed DEI. why? because she would NOT permit Junior to have a 50% stake in the company. she forced him out instead.

duh.




Suomynona July 18, 2012 1:35 PM
Instead of you guys going after women - for being women, perhaps your ire would be less futile if it were directed at these men - for not being men.



Peter Jackson is a Feminist. ergo, not a man in any way other than the most obtuse phenotypical expression of genitalia.

and i actually HAVE criticized him specifically before. actually on this blog.

however, THIS blog post is about the inimical effects of feminist cultural marxism ...


VD July 18, 2012 3:39 PM
What an asshole Jackson has turned out to be.



*shrugs*

if you remember, i critiqued the first two LOTR movies as being completely useless ( except for the appearance of the Balrog at the opening of TT ) and RotK as being just BARELY serviceable. as films.

it's been obvious from the release of FotR that he was a twit.



George July 18, 2012 4:25 PM
Nothing wrong with a business trying to attract a broader audience.


so to speak.



papabear July 18, 2012 5:56 PM
Is there a link between being a athletes and pedestalizing?


t,ftfy

i mean, i'm kind of tired of all the hero worship of Michael Jordan and Tiger Woods and Anderson Silva and Michael Schumacher and all the rest. aren't you?

Anonymous Wendy July 19, 2012 2:40 PM  

even in the window dressing Battle of Minis Tirith ( whose only function in the book is TOO KEEP SAURON DISTRACTED ), all the glory ( the defeat of the leader of the Nazgul ) gets stolen by a woman ( Eowyn ) and a midget ( Merry ).

The Battle of Minus Tirith was started by Sauron, the distraction was the battle at the Gates of Mordor after Minus Tirith was successful defended (somewhat). Glory was shared by many in both battles - Pippin got his turn too.

Anonymous Jeigh Di July 19, 2012 4:21 PM  

the ONLY thing that mattered was the destruction of the Ring. and the ONLY ones capable of destroying the Ring were ... a couple of little midgets.

Actually, they weren't capable of destroying it (nor were they meant to be). At the end Frodo fell and claimed the Ring for his own. It was only that Gollum bit Frodo's finger off and then accidently fell into the volcano that the Ring was destroyed.

Anonymous Stickwick July 19, 2012 4:25 PM  

Actually, they weren't capable of destroying it (nor were they meant to be). At the end Frodo fell and claimed the Ring for his own. It was only that Gollum bit Frodo's finger off and then accidently fell into the volcano that the Ring was destroyed.

IIRC, Tolkien's point with this was that mercy (towards Gollum, on the part of both Bilbo and Frodo) played a big part in saving Middle Earth.

Anonymous bob k. mando July 20, 2012 5:08 PM  

Jeigh Di July 19, 2012 4:21 PM
Actually, they weren't capable of destroying it (nor were they meant to be). At the end Frodo fell and claimed the Ring for his own. It was only that Gollum bit Frodo's finger off and then accidently fell into the volcano that the Ring was destroyed.


1 - a CAREFUL reader would have noted that i didn't actually say that they DID destroy the ring. i only said that they were the only two who were "capable". everyone else lost their minds almost immediately after donning it. some couldn't even handle being exposed to it's presence.

2 - i considered pointing out that the Ring was destroyed by the EVIL midget ... but i didn't see any point in confusing numbnuts further.

3 - more to your objection, the only reason that the evil midget was there in the first place was because he was chasing/aiding Frodo and Samwise. Frodo and Sam were the only ones who COULD have gotten the Ring to Mt Doom. the Ring being at Mt. Doom is the only reason Smeagol would have entered Mordor.

Frodo's will may have failed at the critical moment but he was STILL the thematic impetus for the destruction of the Ring.

and Grinder was raging against a thematic strand which does NOT exist in the book OR the movie.


it's kind of like having to defend Heinlein against accusations of fascism. the people making such an accusation never arrived at that conclusion from the facts, and they're never going to be dissuaded from that opinion by facts. the expression of the FACTS is for the uninformed observers.

the browbeating is for the dumbass retard who made the accusation. humiliation is the only thing that's going to have any effect on THEM.

http://www.ibdof.com/viewtopic.php?f=35&t=370&p=4669&hilit=starship+troopers#p4669



Wendy July 19, 2012 2:40 PM
The Battle of Minus Tirith was started by Sauron, the distraction was the battle at the Gates of Mordor after Minus Tirith was successful defended (somewhat). Glory was shared by many in both battles - Pippin got his turn too.



good catch.

this is what i get for commenting on something i haven't read in 20 years.

i coulda SWORN the Nazgul didn't get killed until the final battle ...


still, thematically, everything after Frodo and Sam split from the Fellowship functioned to distract Sauron from the Ring.



Wendy July 19, 2012 2:40 PM
Glory was shared by many in both battles - Pippin got his turn too.


another midget.

my point is/was/remains that the reality of the story was in direct opposition to Grinder's characterization of it. LOTR is NOT a story about how the masses must wait passively to be saved by the superheroically superheroing superhero.

passing credit around to MORE non-ubermensch kind of reinforces my point.

thanks.



ever since Ledger's role as the Joker, and so many of the geekosphere exalting the Joker character as 'heroic' i had wondered if any of them would actualize their obvious sociopathy:
http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2012/07/20/nyc-police-commissioner-said-alleged-shooter-called-himself-joker-could-have/

i don't care who you are, that there is funny.

Blogger Duke of Earl July 22, 2012 4:37 AM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger Duke of Earl July 22, 2012 4:38 AM  

I always saw Batman as responsible for the crimes of the Joker because he allowed the Joker to live and get onto the revolving door that was the Gotham legal system.

One bullet (or a magazine of bullets) and no more Joker.

Apparently he was supposed to die after his first appearance, but a writer brought him back from the dead.

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