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Tuesday, February 04, 2014

Fear of a Black Yoga Class

One has to salute the remarkable courage of this brave young woman who was faced by a terrible moral crisis in the very last place she expected it:
A few weeks ago, as I settled into an exceptionally crowded midday class, a young, fairly heavy black woman put her mat down directly behind mine. It appeared she had never set foot in a yoga studio—she was glancing around anxiously, adjusting her clothes, looking wide-eyed and nervous. Within the first few minutes of gentle warm-up stretches, I saw the fear in her eyes snowball, turning into panic and then despair. Before we made it into our first downward dog, she had crouched down on her elbows and knees, head lowered close to the ground, trapped and vulnerable. She stayed there, staring, for the rest of the class.

Because I was directly in front of her, I had no choice but to look straight at her every time my head was upside down (roughly once a minute). I've seen people freeze or give up in yoga classes many times, and it's a sad thing, but as a student there's nothing you can do about it. At that moment, though, I found it impossible to stop thinking about this woman. Even when I wasn't positioned to stare directly at her, I knew she was still staring directly at me. Over the course of the next hour, I watched as her despair turned into resentment and then contempt. I felt it all directed toward me and my body....

I got home from that class and promptly broke down crying. Yoga, a beloved safe space that has helped me through many dark moments in over six years of practice, suddenly felt deeply suspect. Knowing fully well that one hour of perhaps self-importantly believing myself to be the deserving target of a racially charged anger is nothing, is largely my own psychological projection, is a drop in the bucket, is the tip of the iceberg in American race relations, I was shaken by it all the same.
Reading this, one is left with one immediate and inescapable question: how on Earth can anyone possibly even attempt to justify female suffrage? Although one can't help but be amused by the idea that a single invasion by one African is sufficient to make this no-doubt "anti-racist" white woman begin to question the safety and value of six years of yoga classes.

Now, a few years ago, one might well have assumed that this simply had to be an SWPL parody. And perhaps it is. But we now live in a post-parodic society where nothing, no matter how absurd, can be assumed to be a joke.

Especially such deadly serious matters as interracial inter-subspecies same-sex stare rape.

213 Comments:

1 – 200 of 213 Newer› Newest»
Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 9:07 AM  

We have reached Peak White Girl

Anonymous Catan February 04, 2014 9:14 AM  

Women largely cannot handle the real, raw world.

Which is why when they vote, they come up with the brilliant idea of voting for pieces of paper that will take care of it for them. Just make it someone else's/a piece of paper's responsibility, as long as it isn't theirs, no problem.

Anonymous PA February 04, 2014 9:14 AM  

From my observation, young SWPL women go about their day reconciling two contradictory imperatives: (1) compliance with anti-racist ideology in word and (2) avoidance of compliance with anti-racism in deed. Unlike a man who pretends to believe in one thing but acts contrary to his stated beliefs, a woman is not aware of the contradiction.

A SWPL female will vote for Democrats and be genuinely offended by racism, but she will carefully pad the nest of her life in a way that insulates her from non-Whites: living in a gentrified neighborhood; dating and socializing with white men (she will date and marry a white beta over a black alpha, if she can't pull a white alpha); working at a white-run company where black women are isolated in Admin departments and black men are few and far between. And she will attend Yoga classes at white gyms. But this is old hat. We know all this.

But this SWPL woman will have a crisis when the contradiction between her anti-racist creed and racist deed.

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 9:20 AM  

#YogaIsForWhiteWomen

Blogger Tom Kratman February 04, 2014 9:22 AM  

"The really big mistake was shoes." ;)

Blogger Magister Wood February 04, 2014 9:23 AM  

If one operates under the assumption that every woman one meets is insane until she proves otherwise, this article makes perfect sense.

Blogger Feather Blade February 04, 2014 9:28 AM  

I'm...pretty sure this is a liberal-mindset problem, more than a female problem.

Seriously, that woman needs to get over herself.

Anonymous Respectabiggle February 04, 2014 9:31 AM  

This has to be a dispatch from some parallel universe. I can't fathom a yoga class causing a panic freeze, and I cannot imagine how having someone next to me who is that pathetic would make me afraid of her.

Baffling.

Anonymous Daniel February 04, 2014 9:35 AM  

Heh. "Fear in her eyes snowball."

I wonder if that sentence is missing a comma.

Anonymous Anonymous February 04, 2014 9:36 AM  

How twisted, to be able to recognize the resentment oozing from someone, and then having to accuse yourself of having "deserved" it to make sure you don't have an un-sanctioned reaction to it, even in your own mind.

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 9:36 AM  

to sum up...

I saw a black woman today... 500 words about my feelings about myself. also I.

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 9:37 AM  

"How twisted, to be able to recognize the resentment oozing from someone, and then having to accuse yourself of having "deserved" it to make sure you don't have an un-sanctioned reaction to it, even in your own mind."

Well in the black girl's defense... she may have resented the fact that crazy white girl kept starring at her.

Anonymous Salt February 04, 2014 9:39 AM  

Why does she think it was despair turning into resentment and contempt? Maybe the woman was realizing her lustful desire would not be reciprocated, exhibiting restraint at not ravishing the desirable white chick then and there.

Blogger Hamilton February 04, 2014 9:41 AM  

"We have reached Peak White Girl"

Yep, that's called Downward Facing Dog.

Anonymous PA February 04, 2014 9:43 AM  

This isn't really a case that calls for criticizing her as "pathetic" or such as an individual. The discomfort she felt was genuine and it comes from a healthy place: an imperative to keep the her home space exclusive. We all react the same way at real and symbolic encroachments on our territory.

The proper target of put scorn is, per Vox's follow-on commentary, the decision to grant women suffrage. The other proper target of our scorn is anti-racism itself, which makes a higher class of white women live as hypocrites and in worst instances creators what Larry Auster called "the dead white woman tax."

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 9:45 AM  

Ya know the article is valuable for one aspect... we get to see a brilliant example of what happens when the anti-racist lilly white liberals actually see black people.

Its always fun to be called a racist by the snow whites who almost never even see black people... much less interact with them.

Anonymous Brother Thomas February 04, 2014 9:45 AM  

It is so sad. A Liberal can never look at a person and see an individual. They always see a category. They see a race. They see an ethnicity. They see a surmised political affiliation. They seldom see a person.

Anonymous trolli February 04, 2014 9:52 AM  

***how on Earth can anyone possibly even attempt to justify female suffrage?***
 
Shouldn’t the comments of Nate, Crying Ryan, Daniel, Godfrey, Kratman, etc… etc… raise the same questions about male suffrage then?  MPAI afterall….
 

Anonymous realmatt February 04, 2014 9:54 AM  

Over the course of the next hour, I watched as her despair turned into resentment and then contempt. I felt it all directed toward me and my body....and...had her chest been a cannon she'd have shot her heart upon it.

Well meaning SWPL white girls are insufferable.

Anonymous the woodsman February 04, 2014 9:56 AM  

Here's my sales pitch to SWPL women: "You wouldn't be subjected to stares of resentment and contempt from fat Negro women in yoga class if White people take back the right of association and right of free speech. Oh, and your chances of being raped or murdered would also be seriously reduced." Oh well, I guess I just don't give a shit about the ones who don't buy into my program.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 9:56 AM  

Shouldn’t the comments of Nate, Crying Ryan, Daniel, Godfrey, Kratman, etc… etc… raise the same questions about male suffrage then? MPAI afterall….

It's never too early for popcorn!

Anonymous Anonymous February 04, 2014 9:57 AM  

No evidence of kindness anywhere. Can you imagine men behaving like that? As Prof. Higgins said," Why can't a woman be like a man?"

Blogger swiftfoxmark2 February 04, 2014 9:59 AM  

Especially such deadly serious matters as interracial same-sex stare rape

Don't you mean intersubspecies same-sex stare rape?

Anonymous the woodsman February 04, 2014 9:59 AM  

"It is so sad. A Liberal can never look at a person and see an individual. They always see a category. They see a race. They see an ethnicity. They see a surmised political affiliation. They seldom see a person."

At least this SWPL women was smarter than you! Either you are a very young child, or you are VERY lucky to have survived as long as you have.

Anonymous VD February 04, 2014 10:04 AM  

Don't you mean intersubspecies same-sex stare rape?

Good point. I stand totally corrected.

Blogger mgl February 04, 2014 10:09 AM  

Don't miss the follow-up!

It Happened To Me: I Read An Essay About A White Woman’s Yoga Class/Black Woman Crisis And I Cannot

Or the follow-up to the follow-up!

I Assigned That "Yoga Class" Piece And Here's Why

I've got to say that the Angry Black Women have a point, smothered as it is in layers of pretentious verbiage: The original essay reads very much like I'm skinny and hot, but I feel self-conscious about the fact that this black woman made me reflect on my skinny and hot privilege, so I'm telling you all about it. By the way, did I mention that I'm skinny and hot?

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 10:10 AM  

I should really submit a piece about that time a pajama boy walked into the gym and started doing one leg quarter squats while balancing on a bosu ball.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 10:10 AM  

As Prof. Higgins said," Why can't a woman be like a man?"

Because if we could, as Eliza said, "I can easily do without you."

In fact, that was kind of the point of first-wave feminism: to be like men, because being like a woman is being subhuman. So many paleo-feminists, I tells ya...

Anonymous RedJack February 04, 2014 10:12 AM  

So a black woman went to Yoga, and this gal had a meltdown..

Don't get it. Really don't.

Yoga is pretty stupid.

Anonymous NorthernHamlet February 04, 2014 10:14 AM  

Especially such deadly serious matters as [...] inter-subspecies same-sex stare rape.

Literally spit my coffee out.

Thanks.

Saw this a few days ago, and I couldn't believe it. That and the one about white-supremacist connections of facial hair.

Vox, side note: I don't think you're markup allows commentators to use "strike" or "s." If this is intentional, disregard.

Anonymous Brother Thomas February 04, 2014 10:15 AM  

@the woodsman February 04, 2014 9:59 AM "At least this SWPL women was smarter than you! Either you are a very young child, or you are VERY lucky to have survived as long as you have."


No, I' not as tough and wordly as you "woodsman". I bet you're really scary. You should try me sometime and find out how naive I am.

Anonymous Stg58/Animal Mother February 04, 2014 10:16 AM  

I've been to a bunch of yoga classes and I've never seen Dhalsim show up.

"YOGA FLAME!"

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 10:18 AM  

Odds the woodsman comes into contact with any blacks on a daily basis?

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 10:22 AM  

"Odds the woodsman comes into contact with any blacks on a daily basis?"

Don't know... but maybe his wife does.

HIYO!

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 10:24 AM  

You mean his exwife did?

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 10:30 AM  

Yoga is pretty stupid.

Yep. It's a Hindu religious practice repackaged as "physical fitness". If you aren't a Hindu, you're not getting the full benefit, so why not spend your time on a more relevant fitness program?

Anonymous Huckleberry - est. 1977 February 04, 2014 10:31 AM  

Yoga, a beloved safe space that has helped me through many dark moments in over six years of practice, suddenly felt deeply suspect

Fatty can't bend, and it made me deeply uncomfortable, because black.
I'm surprised her headline wasn't The Audacity of Hope.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 10:33 AM  

You mean his exwife did?

Monogamonormative presumption! Your privilege is showing!!!

Anonymous Jill February 04, 2014 10:34 AM  

"I'm...pretty sure this is a liberal-mindset problem, more than a female problem.

Seriously, that woman needs to get over herself."

It's neither a liberal problem nor a female problem. It's a problem of too much ease in life--that is, being "neurotic". She has the emotional problems of a person who hasn't really suffered. She should probably seek therapy immediately.

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 10:36 AM  

"Yep. It's a Hindu religious practice repackaged as "physical fitness"."

Its also the first stage of Thelema.

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 10:38 AM  

How many people asserting that yoga is stupid have actually done yoga?

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 10:38 AM  

"
It's neither a liberal problem nor a female problem. It's a problem of too much ease in life--that is, being "neurotic". She has the emotional problems of a person who hasn't really suffered. She should probably seek therapy immediately."

Society has "progressed" to the point where human beings are suffering the same neuroses as tiny yipping lap dogs.

I don't see how therapy could help though. Unless it involved forced labor.

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 10:39 AM  

"How many people asserting that yoga is stupid have actually done yoga?"

I don't do yoga because I'm not a satanist.

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 10:42 AM  

And yet you also celebrate Easter and Christmas and Halloween...

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 10:42 AM  

She should probably seek therapy immediately.

She's probably IN therapy, and on prescriptions so she doesn't suffer.

She needs to experience some actual physical pain (no, not the 50 Shades kind, I mean like a bad back or a toothache), and get outside of her little insulated circle of affirmation. You're right in that she's sheltered, but the only cure for that is experiencing reality.

Blogger JP February 04, 2014 10:43 AM  

She has the emotional problems of a person who hasn't really suffered.

This. This is why "almost raped" has its own entry in Encyclopedia Dramatica. We crave drama. And if we don't have drama then, by God, we will manufacture it!

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 10:44 AM  

"And yet you also celebrate Easter and Christmas and Halloween..."

This is probably OT at this point... but I'll be happy to explain the difference elsewhere.

Anonymous dh February 04, 2014 10:45 AM  

The white nut job is also stupid. She didn't hate you because you were white, she hates you because you are not quite as fat as she is.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 10:45 AM  

How many people asserting that shoving pinecones up your nose is stupid have actually shoved pinecones up their noses?

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 10:49 AM  

"She didn't hate you because you were white, she hates you because you are not quite as fat as she is."

or both.

or like I said.. maybe she didn't like being gawked at.

Blogger JP February 04, 2014 10:49 AM  

The only thing I know about Yoga is that Yuri Bezmenov said in one of his lectures that the Soviets thought it a good idea to spread it in the US because "it makes the head soft".

Anonymous Brother Thomas February 04, 2014 10:50 AM  

If you go through life fearful, you're screwed. Predators sense fear. They also sense “prey” that’s would give them a lot of trouble. Fear is your enemy.

Anonymous VD February 04, 2014 10:51 AM  

How many people asserting that shoving pinecones up your nose is stupid have actually shoved pinecones up their noses?

Do please to keep your obscure fetishes to yourself, Sigyn.

Anonymous Krul February 04, 2014 10:55 AM  

People, check your privilege.

The poor white woman, unable to play the sex card, found herself suddenly thrust to the "domination" side. She automatically and involuntarily dominated the black woman with her whiteness and European-ness. It's even worse if she was a young, able bodied, attractive, upper middle class, gentile, heterosexual native English speaker. Will the domination never end?

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 10:57 AM  

"Do please to keep your obscure fetishes to yourself, Sigyn."

She's all talk... I heard she has to use Nasal Ease.

Anonymous jack February 04, 2014 10:58 AM  

You don't have to do yoga; but, I know for a fact that stretching, regular and relentless stretching exercises help your body, attitude, health, and general smugness when you can lock your knees straight, bent to the floor and lay your hands flat to the floor, not just touch your fingertips and keep doing it over and over. I can still do this at 69 years old and it still amazes people who don't work out much. Yoga will get your stretches working. Disclaimer: I have never ever done yoga. And, if I were to want to, it would not be in some silly, expensive class.

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 11:00 AM  

"lock your knees straight, bent to the floor and lay your hands flat to the floor, not just touch your fingertips and keep doing it over and over."

ya gonna let me buy ya dinner first?

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 11:06 AM  

I really hope jack is short for Jacquelin..

Anonymous Krul February 04, 2014 11:08 AM  

I always thought that yoga was just stretching with patina of mystic malarkey created in the '60s, but I could be wrong. Never bothered to research it in depth.

Anonymous Jimmy February 04, 2014 11:08 AM  

If the black woman was asked, she might reply, "I'm not staring at YOU."

Nevermind.

Anonymous Porky February 04, 2014 11:08 AM  

She should have tried to initiate a conversation with the woman.

Something like.."Hi. I loved The Color Purple".

Anonymous cheddarman February 04, 2014 11:09 AM  

Send her to McRapey's yoga studio. He will let big girl have big cry, then turn her into a big black couch

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 11:10 AM  

Rebranding yoga as "static calisthenics" would make someone a fortune...

Anonymous Porky February 04, 2014 11:11 AM  

"Hi! You were great in that movie "Precious"."

Anonymous Anonymous February 04, 2014 11:17 AM  

Thanks to reading the comments section of the article mgl linked to, I have now learned that "articulate" is a racist insult.

Anonymous Krul February 04, 2014 11:19 AM  

Before we made it into our first downward dog, she had crouched down on her elbows and knees, head lowered close to the ground, trapped and vulnerable. She stayed there, staring, for the rest of the class.

Because I was directly in front of her, I had no choice but to look straight at her every time my head was upside down (roughly once a minute)


Hilarious mental image. Imagine these two staring helplessly into each other's eyes, their positions inverted, one crouched and cowering behind her arms like a puppy, the other on hands and feet thrusting her belly upward while her head hangs upside down between her arms, the fear and resentment in their eyes growing minute by minute like an involuntary and highly unorthodox stare-out contest...

Anonymous jack February 04, 2014 11:19 AM  

@Nate: Gosh Nate, so you're gay? Who would have thought it. I'm not. Very hetero and I'll stack my ability to stay limber and athletic up against yours any time. Bet I can out shoot you as well. Oh, and I am an NRA life member. Or you?
So there...

Anonymous Idle Dhalsim February 04, 2014 11:21 AM  

#YogaIsForWhiteWomen

And yet ironically, developed by men, as always. Kind of like how all the top chefs are men.


A few weeks ago, as I settled into an exceptionally crowded midday class, a young, fairly heavy black woman put her mat down directly behind mine.

This has nothing to do with being black. Hello? You are fat. Deal with it.

Fat Asians, fat white people, fat Native Americans, and even fat Indians would have a problem doing yoga.

Someone like Rihanna or Gabrielle Union would be fine.

I can't fathom a yoga class causing a panic freeze, and I cannot imagine how having someone next to me who is that pathetic would make me afraid of her.

Undeveloped amygdala? The irony being yoga is supposed to develop calm.

Don't get it. Really don't.

Yoga is pretty stupid.


That's just the Americanized ones. It's actually very old.

Yep. It's a Hindu religious practice repackaged as "physical fitness". If you aren't a Hindu, you're not getting the full benefit, so why not spend your time on a more relevant fitness program?

Bzzzzt! It's also in sects of Buddhism.

Anonymous Porky February 04, 2014 11:23 AM  

"Hi! I just think it's wondahful to have a dahkie in our yoga class!"

Blogger Random February 04, 2014 11:26 AM  

lock your knees straight, bent to the floor and lay your hands flat to the floor, not just touch your fingertips and keep doing it over and over.

Were you doing this staring at a train set with Woody Allen behind you?

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 11:31 AM  

"@Nate: Gosh Nate, so you're gay? Who would have thought it. I'm not. Very hetero and I'll stack my ability to stay limber and athletic up against yours any time. Bet I can out shoot you as well. Oh, and I am an NRA life member. Or you?
So there..."

***chuckle***

Irony... lifetime NRA member brags about his ability to bend over.

Anonymous Salt February 04, 2014 11:31 AM  

ya gonna let me buy ya dinner first?

Watch out Nate. He's 69 and in yoga pants.

Anonymous Tawmmy from Quinzee February 04, 2014 11:32 AM  

PORKY YOU AH NAWT GRITTY ENOUGH TO GET AWAY WITH YOUWAH CULTAHAL APPROPRIATION OF OUWAH GRITTY BAHSTAHN DIALECT! YOU AH EVEN A SELF ADMITTED DAHKIE! YOU WOULD NEVAH UNDAHSTAND WHAT IT MEANS TO BE TOUGH AND GRITTY LIKE MAHKY MAHK IN THE DEPAHTD OAH JERAMMY RENNAH IN THE TOWN!

Blogger IM2L844 February 04, 2014 11:32 AM  

Regardless of the skinny white girl's neurosis, Jill, it's also a liberal mindest (stirring the fire will put it out)problem. They can't understand that encouraging hypersensitivity is a contributing factor not a solution.

Blogger Hermit February 04, 2014 11:33 AM  

But we now live in a post-parodic society where nothing, no matter how absurd, can be assumed to be a joke.
Sad, irrefutable truth.
When I first heard of gender theory and shit I tought it was just a joke or a strawman but it is full of mentally ill people believing that stuff.
I had the same shock the first time I heard someone say "white privileged".

Yoga is pretty stupid.
It is like a non christian doing the spiritual excercises of the jesuits because he wants to relax and feel connected with a generic absolute.
The dangerous part is when churches and monasteries invite yoga class to practice and do sincretic conferences with yoga teachers or weird gurus (and it happens a lot).

My opinion is that this is caused by the spiritual desert of our contemporary society, while the catholic church eliminate latin from the mass many people are learning mantra and stuff in sanskrit.
The western world really has broken from reality.

Anonymous Noah B. February 04, 2014 11:37 AM  

"Irony... lifetime NRA member brags about his ability to bend over."

Nominated for thread win.

Blogger Laguna Beach Fogey February 04, 2014 11:38 AM  

Poor girl. She should take up lacrosse.

There is the chance, of course, that she is a hottie and the African female was simply turned on by what she saw.

Don't knock yoga. It can actually be good for you. Two years ago a hot blonde gf introduced me to it. I later got rid of her, and today I have better things to do.

Anonymous Noah B. February 04, 2014 11:40 AM  

"The white nut job is also stupid. She didn't hate you because you were white, she hates you because you are not quite as fat as she is."

Which is a result of white privilege, dh. Don't you know that?

Anonymous Atlantic February 04, 2014 11:40 AM  

Yoga is just an Indian reinterpretation of British Army calisthenics. Nothing 'spiritual' about it, which is fine (nothing against the British army of old), but naive White women need to stop pretending it is.
The whole thing is embarrassing for our race.

Anonymous Porky February 04, 2014 11:44 AM  

@Tawmmy from Quinzee

Actually I was going for southron. Should have included a "y'all" or two.

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 11:46 AM  

"Actually I was going for southron. Should have included a "y'all" or two."

when going for southron ya can't use "dahkie". That's a yankee thing. Boston mostly. if you're looking to mock southrons you should go with "naygra".

Anonymous bob k. mando February 04, 2014 11:47 AM  

Feather Blade February 04, 2014 9:28 AM
I'm...pretty sure this is a liberal-mindset problem, more than a female problem.



and the liberal-mindset is, at it's root, effeminate. your point is?



it’s a question of enormous systemic failure. ...
it is precisely this feeling of not being able to engage, not knowing how to engage, that mitigates the hope for change.


notice how she externalizes her personal problem ( characterizes it as systemic failure ).

she does this to avoid personal responsibility for her failure to act like a human being. because she's fucking slime and, at some level, she knows this.

because if she wasn't fucking slime, she'd have done the human thing.



Jill February 04, 2014 10:34 AM
She has the emotional problems of a person who hasn't really suffered. She should probably seek therapy immediately.


you're more deft than your average bear. this is joke, yes?



dh February 04, 2014 10:45 AM
She didn't hate you because you were white, she hates you because you are not quite as fat as she is.



right. there's nothing racist about Jeremiah Wright. he's only about unjustified privilege, his attitudes have nothing to do with skin color.

you've got another perceptual problem to get over: blacks are some of the most racist people on the planet. see hutus vs tutsis.



Krul February 04, 2014 11:08 AM
but I could be wrong.



no shit.

Pilates was based on secularized yoga. and Joseph Pilates was studying yoga in the 19th century ... so yeah, ' yoga was invented in 1960' is really ignorant.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_Pilates


Porky February 04, 2014 11:08 AM
She should have tried to initiate a conversation with the woman.


the real answer. what is so fucking difficult about striking up a conversation with her? the author even notes that it's not that unusual for a new white fatty to lock up.

at worst case, turn around after the session is over and say hi and see if you can help her. of course, this is also something that any decent instructor should be taking care of as well.


Bill Burr discussing the nuts & bolts of comedy: there is a 'hack' for every room and becoming a 'good' comedian is figuring out the hack. becoming a 'great' comedian is being able to subvert the hack.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9A8-4yC7w3g&t=30m30s

Anonymous Cryan Ryan February 04, 2014 11:47 AM  

I've asked people over the years if they can give a shred of evidence that women's suffrage is not destroying our country.

To date, no one has ever offered anything of substance.

I'm still open...anyone??

Anonymous Pajama Boy February 04, 2014 11:48 AM  

They came for our yoga and I did nothing.
They came for our mochafrapuhalfkafsoylattes and I did nothing.
They came for our gentrified urban enclave and I did nothing.
They came for our flannel onesies and I did nothing.
Then they came for our skinny jeans, but they didn't fit.

Anonymous Idle Dhalsim February 04, 2014 11:49 AM  

Yoga is just an Indian reinterpretation of British Army calisthenics. Nothing 'spiritual' about it, which is fine (nothing against the British army of old), but naive White women need to stop pretending it is.
The whole thing is embarrassing for our race.


Hahahaha. The stupid here is making my temples hurt (pun).

The earliest concrete yoga dates back to 500 BC. I say concrete, because it might be back to 3000 BC. That is speculation though.

Anonymous jack February 04, 2014 11:51 AM  

@Nate: Depend on you to turn a comment on the advantages of staying limber and exercising into what you did. Can you accomplish the exercise move I mentioned? If not, maybe you should start working out before your weight gets more out of hand.

Blogger Hermit February 04, 2014 11:53 AM  

Christians must respect other spiritual tradition but should not borrow other religious practices thinking is just stretching.

By the way we have our own ways http://orthodoxwiki.org/Hesychasm

Anonymous Stilicho February 04, 2014 11:54 AM  

general smugness when you can lock your knees straight, bent to the floor and lay your hands flat to the floor, not just touch your fingertips and keep doing it over and over. I can still do this at 69 years old

You're gonna be real popular in geezer prison

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 11:56 AM  

Is jack Jack Lalanne?

Anonymous Porky February 04, 2014 11:57 AM  

if you're looking to mock southrons you should go with "naygra".

Thanks. So something like "Hi, y'all! Be a good naygra and get me clean towel".

Blogger JCclimber February 04, 2014 11:59 AM  

Attended a yoga class a couple times in my single days.
Was surprised that it was a decent workout. Not nearly as good as lifting, however.

Mostly my friend and I attended out of curiousity about all those limber women.....in yoga pants. In the 12 years since, haven't felt the need to check it out again.

But this article is quite funny, her breakdown once she gets home and realizes that her most precious refuge from the world / scary dark brown people has been invaded is pretty humorous.

Anonymous DrTorch February 04, 2014 12:02 PM  

Well in the black girl's defense... she may have resented the fact that crazy white girl kept starring at her.

Ok, that was funny.

Anyway, I thought yoga was what the British soldiers brought into India:

http://www.amazon.com/Yoga-Body-Origins-Posture-Practice/dp/0195395344/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1300745921&sr=8-1

Anonymous JI February 04, 2014 12:03 PM  

If Whites ever turn on Blacks, it will be the white, urban liberals doing so. The gun-toting "rednecks" out in the sticks will provide the only safe havens for blacks.

Blogger Marissa February 04, 2014 12:04 PM  

When I first heard of gender theory and shit I tought it was just a joke or a strawman but it is full of mentally ill people believing that stuff.

Try reading some gushing article about the male-to-female MMA fighter Boyd Burton (now known as Fallon Fox). Guys, he's actually a woman now! He's been on hormones for ten years and his bone structure, muscularity, and all traces of masculine advantage have been completely wiped clear of his system! He has absolute no strength advantage and wins his matches against women through technique and skill alone! A cosmetic surgeon in the article said so. That's a doctor.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 12:06 PM  

Bzzzzt! It's also in sects of Buddhism.

You seem to think that Buddhism and Hinduism are unrelated. Aren't you supposed to be, like, smart or something?

Do please to keep your obscure fetishes to yourself, Sigyn.

Who knew you were such a prude?

She's all talk... I heard she has to use Nasal Ease.

Only for the opened ones.

...You people are a bad influence, you know that?

Anonymous Ferd February 04, 2014 12:06 PM  

I am in awe at this skinny white girl's ability to read minds! It has to be the Yoga and way it can heighten senses.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 12:08 PM  

now known as Fallon Fox

Definitely a bad influence. I keep thinking I see a dirty joke in that name.

Anonymous hygate February 04, 2014 12:09 PM  

Read the "Why I Assigned" response. The black female editor complains about a spring break trip she took with a bunch of skinny rich white girls who failed to be ashamed of their "body privilege" and where she felt "anonymous."

Translation, the hot girls made me feel fat and got all the male attention. Bitches.

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 12:09 PM  

"...You people are a bad influence, you know that?"

...

YOU'RE MARRIED TO LOKI!

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 12:09 PM  

I am in awe at this skinny white girl's ability to read minds! It has to be the Yoga and way it can heighten senses.

It's called "female intuition". It's kind of like empathy, which we come equipped with standard and you have to take sensitivity-training courses to learn.

Anonymous Krul February 04, 2014 12:12 PM  

Re; Marissa,

And I thought pre-match weight manipulation was questionable. That Burton/Fox character has taken sports cheating to a whole newl level.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 12:14 PM  

YOU'RE MARRIED TO LOKI!

But sanctity of marriage bed and things! It's okay for him!

THIS IS YOUR FAULT!!! *points shaking finger*

Blogger Hermit February 04, 2014 12:15 PM  

Try reading some gushing article about the male-to-female MMA fighter Boyd Burton (now known as Fallon Fox). Guys, he's actually a woman now! He's been on hormones for ten years and his bone structure, muscularity, and all traces of masculine advantage have been completely wiped clear of his system! He has absolute no strength advantage and wins his matches against women through technique and skill alone! A cosmetic surgeon in the article said so. That's a doctor.

But there are also differences in the brain, for example the female brain is better at understanding emotions.
You can firmly believe to be a woman, you can take hormones for you entire life but what about the structure of your brain?

Anonymous Idle Dhalsim February 04, 2014 12:16 PM  

You seem to think that Buddhism and Hinduism are unrelated. Aren't you supposed to be, like, smart or something?

Puerto Rican voice: Oh NO she DED-ENT!

And Islam, Confucianism, and Christianity are like, related, like, because they were started by, like a cute guy at the mall and stuff.

Of course relation not withstanding (I also left out Jainism), that directly contradicts "If you aren't a Hindu, you're not getting the full benefit, so why not spend your time on a more relevant fitness program?" now does it not?

I am in awe at this skinny white girl's ability to read minds! It has to be the Yoga and way it can heighten senses.

Her shoe chakras were in alignment.

Anonymous bob k. mando February 04, 2014 12:21 PM  

Sigyn February 04, 2014 12:14 PM
THIS IS YOUR FAULT!!! *points shaking finger*



it which Sigyn externalizes her personal foibles and assigns them to the self-designated Alpha.

*wink*

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 12:22 PM  

Of course relation not withstanding (I also left out Jainism), that directly contradicts "If you aren't a Hindu, you're not getting the full benefit, so why not spend your time on a more relevant fitness program?" now does it not?

Your wit is so razor-edged, no hair can escape unsplit.

I missed you too, Idly-poo.

Anonymous bob k. mando February 04, 2014 12:25 PM  

Idle Dhalsim February 04, 2014 12:16 PM
Of course relation not withstanding (I also left out Jainism)


but that's the point.

IF you assert that yoga has origins in Hinduism
THEN, of necessity, you include all those movements that grew out Hinduism.

it's questionable whether Hindu grew out of Jainism or vice versa ( because the origins of both are pre-historic ) or if they're merely parallel developments so if you wanted to bring up another source, mentioning Jainism would have actually served a purpose.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 12:25 PM  

it which Sigyn externalizes her personal foibles and assigns them to the self-designated Alpha.

Actually, he who takes point gets shot first.

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 12:25 PM  

"it which Sigyn externalizes her personal foibles and assigns them to the self-designated Alpha."

#winning

Anonymous Pseudo-Nate February 04, 2014 12:26 PM  

KrulFebruary 04, 2014 10:55 AM
People, check your privilege.

Consider my Jimmies rustled..

Anonymous Jack Amok February 04, 2014 12:27 PM  

The white nut job is also stupid. She didn't hate you because you were white, she hates you because you are not quite as fat as she is.

But dh, that's exactly what the nut job wanted her readers to get from the story.

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 12:27 PM  

No one has mentioned the awesomeness of girls in yoga pants yet?

You disappoint me, ilk.

Anonymous Jack Amok February 04, 2014 12:29 PM  

It's called "female intuition". It's kind of like empathy,

You misspelled solipsism there.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 12:30 PM  

No one has mentioned the awesomeness of girls in yoga pants yet?

They're too busy measuring their...uh...alphas.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 12:30 PM  

You misspelled solipsism there.

Maybe I should have spelled "sarcasm" instead.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 12:34 PM  

Well, naptime for Squish, and I'm going to go be all RACISSSSS by scrubbing the shower stall until it's white.

Have fun with your privilege and stuff, peoples.

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 12:36 PM  

You don't have minions to do that for you?

Your overlord is stingy with his alleged army indeed.

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 12:36 PM  

"They're too busy measuring their...uh...alphas."

oh go blow your nose.

Anonymous Idle Spectator February 04, 2014 12:37 PM  

Your wit is so razor-edged, no hair can escape unsplit.

I missed you too, Idly-poo.

* * *
It's called "female intuition". It's kind of like empathy

Awwww, that Ted Bundy is just so handsome. We should definitely stay in for dinner. He wants me to sign his cast!

Anonymous Sir_Chancealot February 04, 2014 12:42 PM  

While reading that extended quote, a thought came to mind. "Why didn't she offer that woman some encouragement?"

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 12:45 PM  

"While reading that extended quote, a thought came to mind. "Why didn't she offer that woman some encouragement?" "

WHAT?

and speak to a dahkie?

Are you kidding?

Anonymous DrTorch February 04, 2014 12:45 PM  

While reading that extended quote, a thought came to mind. "Why didn't she offer that woman some encouragement?"

Same here. Is that not allowed in yoga?

Anonymous RedJack February 04, 2014 12:45 PM  

Yoga pants, on the right woman, is awesome.

On the wrong one, it is a horror beyond belief.

Anonymous bob k. mando February 04, 2014 12:48 PM  

Josh February 04, 2014 12:27 PM
No one has mentioned the awesomeness of girls in yoga pants yet?
You disappoint me, ilk.



pics or GTFO.
http://www.themontyminute.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/fat_girl_in_yoga_pants.jpg

[ waiting for someone to tell me how classy i am ]



Sir_Chancealot February 04, 2014 12:42 PM
While reading that extended quote, a thought came to mind. "Why didn't she offer that woman some encouragement?"



i already covered that; because she's fucking slime.

just like leftists almost always are.

Blogger Marissa February 04, 2014 12:53 PM  

Krul February 04, 2014 12:12 PM

And I thought pre-match weight manipulation was questionable. That Burton/Fox character has taken sports cheating to a whole newl level.


Krul, I think they should have same-day weigh-in. I've read both 4HWW articles on weight gain and loss. It's fascinating, but it's completely unfair competition to have 165-pounders competing in a 135-pound class (or whatever the disparity may be). Similar things happen in powerlifting though some organizations have same-day weigh-in to discourage it.

Anonymous DT February 04, 2014 1:04 PM  

Read the "Why I Assigned" response.

Even worse then the original article.

So to summarize all the articles and drama and naval gazing...

* Fat girls shouldn't try yoga.

* White liberal anti-raciss girls are raciss.

* Women really do hate each other. Especially black 'curvy' editors who spend too much time around thin, rich, blonde sluts.

* Finding, pointing out, comparing, and complaining about everyone's various 'privileges' will take longer then developing a unified field theory of everything in particle physics.

Am I missing anything important?

Reading this, one is left with one immediate and inescapable question: how on Earth can anyone possibly even attempt to justify female suffrage?

I'm going to print and save these articles. The next time someone in my family looks at me funny when I say women shouldn't vote, I'm not going to say a word. I'm just going to hand them copies.

Anonymous Krul February 04, 2014 1:06 PM  

Re: Marissa,

I'll tell you what I'd like to see. I'd like to see a male athlete claim to be a woman and try to compete in the women's league. No surgery, no hormones, no behavior or appearance changes at all; he just says "I used to be a hetero man, now I self-identify as a lesbian woman".

After all, "male" and "female" are just social conventions, right? To keep him (I mean "her") out of the women's league or demand that (s)he get surgery or hormones would be heterocisgendernormative fascism.

Anonymous DT February 04, 2014 1:09 PM  

pics or GTFO.
http://www.themontyminute.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/fat_girl_in_yoga_pants.jpg


If this is comparable to what naval gazing white privileged yoga girl saw, then I take back my scorn and offer my sympathies.

I would have cried when I got home to.

Anonymous bob k. mando February 04, 2014 1:10 PM  

Krul February 04, 2014 1:06 PM
I'd like to see a male athlete claim to be a woman and try to compete in the women's league.



will not happen. Female Imperative.

more accurately, has already happened on several occasions but the men are always thrown out and it never gets play beyond local media. because if it went national, the hypocrisy would be a little too blatant.

what you want is for this to happen WITH a media megaphone.

Anonymous Idle Dhalsim February 04, 2014 1:28 PM  

Anyway, I thought yoga was what the British soldiers brought into India:

http://www.amazon.com/Yoga-Body-Origins-Posture-Practice/dp/0195395344/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1300745921&sr=8-1


That's just some of it. A lot of the greatest in both Buddhism and Hinduism yoga they don't even teach to westerners or outsiders. Both from either religion or safety.

pics or GTFO.
http://www.themontyminute.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/fat_girl_in_yoga_pants.jpg

[ waiting for someone to tell me how classy i am ]


The thinner girl could probably have put her yoga mat on that ass and then yoga'ed on top of it.

CLASS STOLEN.

Blogger jdwalker February 04, 2014 1:37 PM  

If you don't understand this woman's story, you obviously have never been to a yoga...class...session...whatever they call it. I recently experienced one myself, and it was difficult not to break down...laughing. My girlfriend purchased a groupon for yoga classes. When I came home from work one day she asked if I would go with her to one class. I reluctantly agreed since I felt like it couldn't hurt to work on flexibility and what not. By the end of the class I was convinced that yoga, at least not some general class, is not a great way to improve flexibility. It doesn't really focus on improving flexibility, and if you have some messed up joints from years of athletic pursuits, it will probably just aggravate them. Well, enough with the aside, and back to the point: the class was an hour and a half of trying not to laugh as the yoga instructor made various noises that I guess was chanting and talked ceaselessly about giving in to life's obstacles and bowing down to the universe. As I looked around, everyone seemed to really be into it. This story is of a piece of that environment and philosophy I guess. The saving grace was that the instructor was quite attractive and not afraid to be hands on in trying to get me into the proper form, which I hope is the reason why there appeared to be several single guys in the class...otherwise, it is even more pathetic than just hoping to get groped by the instructor. Needless to say, I made fun of the class and told my girlfriend she would be going alone to the rest of her classes.

Anonymous Molon Rouge February 04, 2014 1:46 PM  

"White girl stare a lot."

Anonymous Montfort February 04, 2014 1:47 PM  

Yoga is an eastern religious ritual, i.e. satanic. It provides a pathway into the soul for demons to enter. Any Christian (Catholic) should NOT perform yoga.

Anonymous WinstonWebb February 04, 2014 1:52 PM  

Josh February 04, 2014 12:27 PM

No one has mentioned the awesomeness of girls in yoga pants yet?
You disappoint me, ilk.


There is not an ass in the world that can make a pair of Yoga pants overcome the issue about Yoga classes that no one here has mentioned yet:

The farting.

It's awful.

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 1:54 PM  

"The farting.

It's awful."

charcoal lined yoga pants?

Anonymous Anonymous February 04, 2014 1:54 PM  

This obsessive trek into the first person singular has inspired me to share the beautiful poetry of Jewel...

Me

I
I have blonde hair
I pluck my eyebrows
I have my father's nose
my mother's hands
I have crooked teeth
and green eyes
I play guitar
I used to get sick alot
I like the color of wine
I've cheated on boyfriends
I've owned fake ID
But my hair is still blonde
and my teeth are still crooked
and I probably won't always like
the color of wine

II
I have firm breasts
I have lips that always smile
I have veins that bleed
I laugh when I'm nervous
I feel the pain of others
but cry for no reason
I like open flame
I've been selfish since a child
I'm from Alaska
but hate the cold
I've cheated on diets
I've faked applications
But I still bleed
and my lips still smile
and my breasts won't
always be firm

III
I have strong shoulders
I have olive skin
I have a Swiss face I
borrowed from my grandmother
I have long nails on my right hand
which break regularly
My little toe is strange
I write
I used to make wreaths from dandelions
I brush my hair before bed
I cheated on tests
I faked flirtatious French accents
But I still have gold skin
and my nails still break
and I probably won't always have
strong shoulders
and I may not always write
But maybe I'll start
making wreaths
from dandelions again

Anonymous Fran February 04, 2014 1:56 PM  

How come these "white privilege " liberals don't get called for the condition they clearly have.
Stockholm Syndrome!

Blogger Laguna Beach Fogey February 04, 2014 1:56 PM  

Yeah, yoga sucks.

http://www.girlsinyogapants.com/

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 1:59 PM  

I cannot help but note that none of the Girls in Yoga Pants are actually doing yoga.

Anonymous Stilicho February 04, 2014 2:08 PM  

OT: finally, someone tells Rand Paul How to get leftists to like you...because that's all that matters, you see...

Blogger Marissa February 04, 2014 2:14 PM  

Krul, I'd like to see their heads explode when you ask, "which one is MORE female?" They'd turn themselves inside out and then just say both are absolutely female, no ifs, ands, or buts.

Re: yoga and flexibility, has anyone read Kelly Starrett's "Becoming a Supple Leopard"? I prefer this kind of mobility as opposed to static stretching and holds.

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 2:29 PM  

I have not, Markku

Anonymous Dr "And" February 04, 2014 2:44 PM  

Take away lesson if you happen to be black, female, and overweight:

Wandering into an enclave of skinny, white women doing leisurely breathy-stretchy things while showing off their workout apparel and marinating in their own narcissism is not conductive for your feelings of acceptance.

No matter how much faux sorrow they have for you when they gossip among themselves in the locker room.

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 2:46 PM  

That Hoover article is an awesome example of strawmanning.

Anonymous kh123 February 04, 2014 2:54 PM  

"I can still do this at 69 years old and it still amazes people who don't work out much. Disclaimer: I have never ever done yoga. Gosh Nate, so you're gay? Who would have thought it. I'm not. Very hetero and I'll stack my ability to stay limber and athletic up against yours any time. Bet I can out shoot you as well... And, if I were to want to, it would not be in some silly, expensive class. Can you accomplish the exercise move I mentioned?..."

Welcome back, Miss Morgan.

Blogger Glen Filthie February 04, 2014 2:55 PM  

Well boys, sometimes things happen in such away that everyone wins despite the idiots involved!

Consider that while there is nothing better looking than a woman in yoga pants - the yoga studio is a magnet for the worst of female ass-hattery. They go to the studios supposedly to focus their minds (don't ask them on what), relieve stress (don't ask them from what) and promote healthy spirituality (don't ask what that is either). The only thing WORSE than a gaggle of chicken headed women at the yoga class is a gaggle of chicken headed women at the coffee shop afterward!

Can't go to yoga anymore, Chickie? Awwwwwwww. Hey - I know what will make ya feel better! Make me a sammich and do some house cleaning!

HAR HAR HAR!

Anonymous kh123 February 04, 2014 2:56 PM  

...Or, it could be a replay of the "my SWPL's bigger than yours" that took place at Whatever some months ago.

In which case, bravo.

Anonymous Tit for Tat February 04, 2014 3:13 PM  

Once we're back in control and this is all just a bad dream, remember to add the following to the Dark Enlightenment Constitution:


Anyone caught advocating women's suffrage will be given one chance to recant or otherwise face a firing squad.

Blogger Outlaw X February 04, 2014 3:14 PM  

Two words. Drama Queen! I think she is lying and really not that upset about it. She has an inferiority complex while wanting to feel superior to everyone else. Know someone just like her. The woe is me bullshit is really just a cover and the fear and loathing are all in her mind. She wasn't afraid she just wanted everybody to know she has a black belt in Yoga.

Anonymous Anonymous February 04, 2014 3:16 PM  

The culture ("special snowflake" schooling, twitter and other social media, etc.) has programmed people to think their every passing thought is worthy of analysis...that it has meaning. Hence, we get people tweeting what they had for breakfast.

We don't need to see most people's thoughts for the same reason we don't wish to watch actors taking a crap or brushing their teeth in movies: it is uninteresting and unimportant.

People need to get over themselves.

Anonymous cheddarman February 04, 2014 3:21 PM  

Nate, Porky is dying to see you in yoga pants.

Anonymous Stilicho February 04, 2014 3:25 PM  

Nate, Porky is dying to see you in yoga pants.

Wait... I thought Sigyn had a picture of him wearing skinny jeans...

Blogger Laguna Beach Fogey February 04, 2014 3:30 PM  

Yoga pants can be deceiving.

I speak from personal experience.

While yoga pants can certainly frame an attractive behind, they also have the ability to make a flabby lady-arse look harder, firmer than it actually is.

Proceed with caution where women in yoga pants are concerned.

Blogger Outlaw X February 04, 2014 3:31 PM  

To buster my point, I have a good friend whose wife has breast cancer and went through the Chemo and radiation. She was handed pamphlet after Pamphlet of breast cancer support groups. So she attended one, and my fiend said she left before the meeting was over and it was nothing but one big pity party. I am not disparaging people with breast cancer but she certainly disparaged the group think (propaganda). She has a degree in psychology and figured out what was going on real fast. She won't attend another according to him.

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 3:33 PM  

"Wait... I thought Sigyn had a picture of him wearing skinny jeans..."

poppin' tags. that's me.

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 3:37 PM  

Nate wears your granddad's clothes

Blogger Outlaw X February 04, 2014 3:40 PM  

Nate wears camouflaged yoga pants to the deer stand.

Anonymous gwood February 04, 2014 3:40 PM  

...what Larry Auster called "the dead white woman tax."
I was never a big Auster fan, but the man could turn a phrase.

Anonymous bob k. mando February 04, 2014 3:42 PM  

Tit for Pat February 04, 2014 3:13 PM
Anyone caught advocating women's suffrage will be given one chance to recant or otherwise face a firing squad.



naw. we won't care what the women are advocating for, they can keep yelling all they want.

and if it's a man advocating for women's suffrage he doesn't deserve a 2nd chance. genetic hygiene, dontcha know.




Outlaw X February 04, 2014 3:14 PM
The woe is me bullshit is really just a cover and the fear and loathing are all in her mind.



wrong.

read the follow up article by the BLACK FEMALE editor who assigned the story in the first place. this is actually the black woman's natural response.

because the black woman is doing the same thing the white woman is doing, externalizing her own faults onto someone/thing else.

black woman can't do yoga? time to hate the limber white chick in front of you who keeps flaunting her good hair.

white woman picks up that black woman is uncomfortable due to BW's physical inability? blame 'systemic problems' with the yoga class.

Sigyn doesn't like admitting that pine cones fit in her nostrils without lube? blame Nate.

it's all the same thing.



Outlaw X February 04, 2014 3:14 PM
She wasn't afraid she just wanted everybody to know she has a black belt in Yoga.



agreed.

there's little SWPL libs like to do more than humblebrag.

Blogger Outlaw X February 04, 2014 3:55 PM  

wrong.

read the follow up article by the BLACK FEMALE editor who assigned the story in the first place. this is actually the black woman's natural response...

Sigyn doesn't like admitting that pine cones fit in her nostrils without lube? blame Nate


Sorry, information overload. I can't keep up with the amount of BS I see on the net. But I know human nature. I am sure you have had someone call or visit you about a death or sickness that you know was not sincere. That is what I am seeing here.


Anonymous Salt February 04, 2014 4:07 PM  

While yoga pants can certainly frame an attractive behind, they also have the ability to make a flabby lady-arse look harder, firmer than it actually is.

Proceed with caution where women in yoga pants are concerned.


Employ the Charmin test. Yes, caution advised.

Anonymous Noah B. February 04, 2014 4:09 PM  

Reading this, one is left with one immediate and inescapable question: how on Earth can anyone possibly even attempt to justify female suffrage?

Unparalleled comedy value?

Anonymous Porky February 04, 2014 4:10 PM  

Cheddarman: "Nate, Porky is dying to see you in yoga pants."

Coming from the president of the Nate Fanboi Club, this comes off as projection.

Anonymous Just_Michael February 04, 2014 4:14 PM  

Fat black women only know one yoga position,.....the Roosevelt inversion.

Anonymous Earl February 04, 2014 4:47 PM  

Fear of a black yoga class. I have had that phrase stuck in my head for months ever since I first heard it at the end of a debate I watched. It was a debate Q&A with the guy who runs AmRen re: white student union at Townsend U. The black guy gets up and asks the white guy if he's afraid of a black planet. Wow Just wow

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 4:54 PM  

Sorry, information overload.

Don't worry about it, Outlaw. It's basically just an illustration of poor logic that mutated completely out of control because of overexposure to unstable Alpha particles.

I don't really put pinecones up my nose. That would be stupid. I don't have to try it to figure that out. *looks at Josh*

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 4:56 PM  

The black guy gets up and asks the white guy if he's afraid of a black planet.

Correct response: I prefer to live on a blue one.

Blogger Outlaw X February 04, 2014 5:04 PM  

I don't really put pinecones up my nose. That would be stupid. I don't have to try it to figure that out. *looks at Josh*

I know it was sarcasm, Sigyn, not a joke. Me saying Nate wears camouflaged yoga pants was sarcasm. It is different than a Joke. Some people think sarcasm is a joke it is not, it is being ridiculous to point out another absurdity. A Joke is the Juxtaposition of two Ideas simultaneously (you won't find that in the dictionary). We lost the language many years ago.

Blogger Feather Blade February 04, 2014 5:07 PM  

Or the follow-up to the follow-up!

I Assigned That "Yoga Class" Piece And Here's Why


"body privilege" is the only thing I go out of the editor's follow-up. Body Privilege.

"The skinny chicks are oppressing the curvy ones by being skinny! We must prevent this terrible injustice!"

bob k. mando February 04, 2014 11:47 AM
and the liberal-mindset is, at it's root, effeminate. your point is?


Oh, certainly it is effeminate, and effeminacy is the male counterfeit of femininity. Point ^_^.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 5:09 PM  

We lost the language many years ago.

Yes, unfortunately. As goes the language, so goes the culture.

I sometimes think that was the point.

Anonymous cheddarman February 04, 2014 5:11 PM  

Let me attempt to make a joke:

Whereas, I am Nate's number one fanboi according to Porky
whereas Nate has suggested that the U.S. never went to the moon
whereas Big black girls are uncomfortable in yoga classes with skinny white girl SPWL's
whereas the U.S. recently announced it is not going back to the moon any time soon

let it be proposed here that the old negro space program be reactivated, in order to lift the spirit of all peoples everywhere (see link below)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6xJzAYYrX8



Blogger Brad Andrews February 04, 2014 5:11 PM  

Would the original writer had the same sympathy for a fat omega male? I somehow doubt it.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 5:13 PM  

Oh, certainly it is effeminate, and effeminacy is the male counterfeit of femininity. Point ^_^.

Be careful with that there. Some of these guys wouldn't know humor if it got shoved up their noses, with or without lube.

Blogger El Borak February 04, 2014 5:14 PM  

the old negro space program

One of the greatest documentaries of all time.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 5:16 PM  

Let me attempt to make a joke:

Whereas, I am Nate's number one fanboi according to Porky
whereas Nate has suggested that the U.S. never went to the moon
whereas Big black girls are uncomfortable in yoga classes with skinny white girl SPWL's
whereas the U.S. recently announced it is not going back to the moon any time soon

let it be proposed here that the old negro space program be reactivated, in order to lift the spirit of all peoples everywhere


And let cows truly jump over the moon!

*ducks*

Blogger Outlaw X February 04, 2014 5:16 PM  

Sorry, That should read. "The juxtaposition of two incongruent ideas simultaneously".

Anonymous Krul February 04, 2014 5:21 PM  

Outlaw, what drug was the duck on?

Qwack.

"The juxtaposition of two incongruent ideas simultaneously" - Yeah, I can see that.

Blogger Outlaw X February 04, 2014 5:22 PM  

Let me attempt to make a joke:

Sigyn that's not a joke, this is a joke.

Wife texts husband on a cold winter's morning: "Windows frozen, won't open."

Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it."

Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really screwed-up now.”

Anonymous Krul February 04, 2014 5:24 PM  

Knock Knock

Anonymous toothy February 04, 2014 5:25 PM  

let it be proposed here that the old negro space program be reactivated

Classic.

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 5:29 PM  

Y'all...it ain't Wednesday...

Anonymous Noah B. February 04, 2014 5:32 PM  

It is in Japan.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 5:33 PM  

Sigyn that's not a joke, this is a joke.

Yes, and it's funny.

Y'all...it ain't Wednesday...

Actually, it is in Finland! *party*

Blogger Feather Blade February 04, 2014 5:39 PM  

Sigyn February 04, 2014 5:13 PM
Oh, certainly it is effeminate, and effeminacy is the male counterfeit of femininity. Point ^_^.

Be careful with that there. Some of these guys wouldn't know humor if it got shoved up their noses, with or without lube.


* snicker * Well, it only stands to reason; this mockery of stupid women ("but I repeat myself! Amirite, fellas?" *ba-dum-tish*) thing is really SRS BSNS around here, don'cha know.

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 5:47 PM  

Oh, Feather Blade, let's not get crabby. It spoils the party atmosphere. They're mostly okay; some of them just have slow days and have to fill the gaps in witty banter with cheap shots.

*offers tray* Bacon-wrapped chicken wing?

Anonymous Sigyn February 04, 2014 5:50 PM  

Well, damage done. I'll leave the tray here and go make some real food for His Lordship now. He's the REAL party, as far as I'm concerned.

Anonymous bob k. mando February 04, 2014 6:06 PM  

Sigyn February 04, 2014 5:13 PM
Some of these guys wouldn't know humor if it got shoved up their noses, with or without lube.



oh baby, i'm getting all excited over here.

rule 34?

i am actually, honest to god, dying laughing right now.

pine cone in the nose porn. it just don't get no funnier than that.

Markku? make it so.




Feather Blade February 04, 2014 5:39 PM
this mockery of stupid women



and the men who act like stupid women.


nice of you to draw the NAWALT distinction. we truly do appreciate a finely turned intellect and some ample credentials around here.

did you know if squeeze two credentials together you can motorboat them? i'm tellin ya, credential cleavage is where it's at.

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 6:42 PM  

"Don't worry about it, Outlaw. It's basically just an illustration of poor logic that mutated completely out of control because of overexposure to unstable Alpha particles."

Always blaming me... its like i'm on your mind a lot or something...

Blogger Outlaw X February 04, 2014 6:48 PM  

Always blaming me... its like i'm on your mind a lot or something...


Nate how can you take that personally? Is she the black women on the mat looking at your ass? You are in a position to teach and are one of the brilliant men I know.

Blogger Outlaw X February 04, 2014 6:51 PM  

Never mind Nate, It took me a while.

Blogger Nate February 04, 2014 6:55 PM  

heheehehe... no worries old man. I know how it is.

Blogger Tommy Hass February 04, 2014 9:10 PM  

"I'm...pretty sure this is a liberal-mindset problem, more than a female problem.

Seriously, that woman needs to get over herself."

Not even the most retarded mangina would type up such a ridiculous rant.

Blogger Tommy Hass February 04, 2014 9:18 PM  

"gentile"

Being a goy is a privilege now? HA.

Anonymous bob k. mando February 04, 2014 9:19 PM  

Tommy Hass February 04, 2014 9:10 PM
Not even the most retarded mangina would type up such a ridiculous rant.




not even ... PajamaBoy?

not even ... Gore Vidal?

not even ... Barack "if i had a son, he could be Trayvon" Obama?

i think you may underestimate just how low liberals are willing to go.

Blogger Outlaw X February 04, 2014 9:40 PM  

Test, is this sarcasm or a joke?
It's a great day to kick someones ass






Blogger tz February 04, 2014 9:52 PM  

Women should be able to vote on the color of the curtains.

Men can be stupid, especially when testosterone poisoned. however this has a tendency to result in death. Estrogen poisoning is no less damaging, but the result is in hysteric (some will understand the pun) voting.

The problem is voting in the first place. It is futile to try to find a rational "mob". A republic where each has their rights, and errors in the governmental system (which must be small and simple and obvious) should be correctable only with effort. The evil is when effort can be used to extend error.

Blogger LP 999/Eliza February 04, 2014 10:46 PM  

There could be cause for a yoga pant/yoga gear contest here.

Anonymous Josh February 04, 2014 11:30 PM  

Pics will be required, LP

Anonymous Big Bill February 04, 2014 11:45 PM  

A few years ago I mentioned it here and I'll mention it again: call yourself a
"pre-conversion-bull-dyke-lesbian-transsexual".

In other words, you dress like a guy, you have guy's equipment and you like fool around with women ... but you are a girl [deep down inside].

Actually, (and we are almost there!) say you are an "ANTI-conversion-bull-dyke-lesbian-transsexual".

The way things are going, within the decade you can get enraged at women and call them "oppressors" for insisting that you "mutilate" yourself by chopping off your 'nads.

Anonymous bob k. mando February 05, 2014 12:26 AM  

Outlaw X February 04, 2014 9:40 PM
Test, is this sarcasm or a joke?



the audio is a Bob & Tom skit.




Josh February 04, 2014 11:30 PM
Pics will be required, LP



don't you think you ought to clear it with Vox before you arbitrarily reinstate Taylor?

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