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Tuesday, February 24, 2015

You had ONE job!

Far too many women of my generation were let down by their mothers failing to teach them the one basic skill they actually need in life:
My mother hadn’t felt the need to give me a recipe—she knew that I had watched her, and before her my Nani, make the same pot of sauce nearly weekly in my previous 17 years. So many times I smelled the meat, browning in olive oil before the garlic and onions were added, intensifying the distinctive aroma of Nani’s kitchen, which lingered even years after her last pot had been simmered. Yet I didn’t know how to cook.

But what did my mom expect? Both she and my late Nani had always praised and encouraged my good grades and scholarly instincts, and neither had encouraged me to do anything in the kitchen other that set the table. Nani never taught me to forage for burdock or can tomatoes because “you won’t need to,” she said. Cooking was something else the modern young woman wouldn’t have cause to do either, it seemed. So, I focused on my career.

What had stuck with me from those hours in the kitchen watching my mom and Nani cook weekly Sunday dinners or nightly from-scratch meals was not the recipes for beef bracciole or manicotti, but the conversation. “Go to college,” I was always told, “have your own money and don’t rely on a man.”
Let's not make the same mistake with our daughters and sentence them to a lifetime of bad food, obesity, and culinary frigidity. There is nothing more important than for a young girl to be taught how to be a good wife and mother. Nothing. Because nothing less than civilization and the continued existence of the human race depends upon it.

Don't raise your daughters to be dead ends.

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221 Comments:

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Blogger Guitar Man February 24, 2015 12:04 PM  

When I was dating my wife, she knew where my heart was. Yes, I am definitely attracted to her, but it was those chocolate chip cookies that she baked from scratch that finalized the deal. And besides that, there's something very attractive about a woman in the kitchen cooking or baking up a storm.

Blogger Aquila Aquilonis February 24, 2015 12:11 PM  

I knew my wife liked me when she cooked for me when she didn't need to. I knew I liked my wife when I tasted her cooking.

Anonymous Jill February 24, 2015 12:11 PM  

My mom worked for most of my childhood, and she still managed to teach me how to cook, sew, care for children and do number crunching. My dad taught me gardening and other valuable skills. I'm surprised at how many people have no concept of cooking or anything else, really. All of those homely skills women used to be valued for--such as making beautiful art for their homes, cooking, budgeting--are of low value in our society. The feminist movement did pick up on crocheting and knitting for some reason, but they are always so ironic in everything they do. Irony is great in literature, but living in an intentionally ironic way is retarded (belies the meaning of the word); not to mention that it's condescending to one's forebears.

Anonymous MrGreenMan February 24, 2015 12:17 PM  

There's some humor in the failure at what she tried to cook:

In 1983, Paul Fussell described the aspiring middle class girl, moving to the city (yes, always, always Brooklyn), and then reading the New Yorker, failing at quiche lorraine, and then settling on making her "Specialty" spaghetti.

This "lady writer" couldn't even make an edible tomato sauce with it all laid out for her.

In 30 years, we've gone from spaghetti being the go-to option of last resort for the culinarily-inept girl to spaghetti being too complex for the brain on feminism.

Blogger haus frau February 24, 2015 12:18 PM  

Home cooking from whole foods changes your tastes. after a while you won't like most restaurant food more than once in a while and fast food loses its alure almost completely. Its not difficult to learn either. It just takes effort.

Blogger Josh February 24, 2015 12:26 PM  

This is why Martha Stewart is a modern day saint.

Anonymous daddynichol February 24, 2015 12:32 PM  

It's rather telling that the writer of that article was very proud of her academic achievements, yet it seemed she was incapable of reading a recipe and following simple directions. It really pisses me off that she seems to seek praise for doing what she and other feminists shamed traditional mothers for doing. Feminists are retched and vile creatures.

In our house, my wife takes great pride in her culinary skills that were pass to her from her grandmother and mother. She shared that love of food preparation with our daughter (and sons) and now, granddaughter.

Blogger Raggededge February 24, 2015 12:32 PM  

We are raising our daughters to be good wives and mothers and hope that others are doing the same with their daughters. My son needs a good wife someday.

Blogger Leatherwing February 24, 2015 12:34 PM  

Reminds me of my mom. She was an orphan (1st and 3rd birthdays were spent at burials for her parents) and was passed from relative to relative all through childhood. She married at 16, not knowing much about home economics.

My dad would stop by a friend and coworkers place on the way home. When he got home, mom would offer him dinner, but he'd always say that he'd had dinner at Junior's house (which was true). After a little while, my mom walked down to Junior's house, while the husbands were at work, and told her "I need you to teach me how to cook so my husband will come home for dinner".

She was a very good student, not only keeping her husband, but 6 kids well fed and happy with her cooking for the rest of his life. She worked outside the home much of the time, but always saw feeding her family as top priority (and she still does - can't keep her out of the kitchen at 82).

Blogger AmyJ February 24, 2015 12:35 PM  

I love my mom. She's a great cook, skilled at sewing, and always managed to keep a clean house and full table despite five rowdy kids.

But she never showed any interest in teaching me these things. I asked her why she didn't a few years ago. She said she wanted me to enjoy my childhood. My thinking was it just didn't cross her mind.

Didn't really start cooking much until I got married. It's a fairly simple skill; no one expects fine cuisine exquisitely plated every night, so I'm not sure why women of my generation pride themselves on not knowing how to cook. It's like saying you don't know how to do laundry or make the bed.

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 12:36 PM  

I remember that time, I was there. It was considered a symbol of status for a woman to not know how to cook.

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 12:36 PM  

I still remember the pride in their voice, when they pronounced that they could not cook at all.

Blogger James Dixon February 24, 2015 12:37 PM  

Sort of like Lenovo and Superfish. :)

Yeah, cooking is a basic. And it's not like it takes any special skill to throw some meat in the oven and some canned vegetables on the stove.

Blogger Kevin Riley February 24, 2015 12:43 PM  

There were three things my dad said every guy needed to know how to do; shoot, cook and darn socks. I've never darned a sock in my life, but I'm pretty damn good at the other two.

Anonymous Leonidas February 24, 2015 12:45 PM  

I lived on my own for ten years before I got married and I'm pretty sure that I can cook better than the vast majority of modern women.

Despite that, praise be to God that I married a woman who can cook - not just better than me, but better than my mother, better than her mother, and generally she enjoys it and enjoys improving it.

Blogger SarahsDaughter February 24, 2015 12:47 PM  

Yet, despite my years of pride that I had resisted domestic duties, my first attempt at cooking came in a decidedly non-intellectual way: I wanted to impress my boyfriend.

Feminism betrayed again by nature!!!

Yesterday my husband and a male coworker were in the elevator as two women got to the closing door late and attempted to open it themselves. The other man said "huh, and here the two of us men stand not doing anything to help." The woman looked up with a look of agreement. My husband announces "Feminism's dead." - caught off guard and clearly expecting him to have said "chivalry's dead" she blustered "huh, what do you mean feminism's dead?" He replied, "Look at you, failing at opening an elevator door and looking to men to help you, evidently feminism is dead." She cowered "I guess you're right" and got off the elevator at her floor. The other guy busted a gut after the doors closed.

Anonymous Jill February 24, 2015 12:49 PM  

" And it's not like it takes any special skill to throw some meat in the oven and some canned vegetables on the stove." Are you kidding me? Cooking is about the purity of ingredients, understanding and being able to taste distinct flavors. It's about freshness and nourishment and beauty. Sorry, one just doesn't open a can of vegetables or throw meat in the oven. That's just wrong. I'm very French in my cooking philosophy.

Blogger David February 24, 2015 12:51 PM  

Once again, girls so busy (being told to be or) being boys that they aren't even decent girls.

OpenID genericviews February 24, 2015 12:55 PM  

Funny thing is, no matter how good girls are in school or how many degrees they get, or even how well they do jumping into industry, chances are still very high they will put it all behind them and become moms.

Blogger David February 24, 2015 12:56 PM  

My sons all can cook.
Their wives are learning to cook WITH them. Cooking together turns a daily activity into a social event.

"A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects."

-Robert A. Heinlein

Blogger SarahsDaughter February 24, 2015 12:59 PM  

Cooking is about the purity of ingredients, understanding and being able to taste distinct flavors. It's about freshness and nourishment and beauty. Sorry, one just doesn't open a can of vegetables or throw meat in the oven.

One step at a time, Jill. one.step.at.a.time.

Anonymous hygate February 24, 2015 1:01 PM  

She was getting savaged in the comments.

As someone there said (paraphrased), "Does learning how to change a tire make me a misogynist?" Its a life skill. Get over yourself.

But she is also making a big deal about cooking for her husband, even preparing meals for him while she is out of town. I seem to recall a Chris Rock bit about men bragging that they were taking care of their children. Something about not getting credit for doing what you are supposed to do. Not that she is supposed to cook for her husband, that is between her and him. Its the idea that she should be getting extra credit as a loving wife because she does so.

NSFW

http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=chris+rock+credit+for+doing+what+you+should&qpvt=chris+rock+credit+for+doing+what+you+should&FORM=VDRE#view=detail&mid=31DEC3F005443B5CA7A031DEC3F005443B5CA7A0

Blogger David February 24, 2015 1:04 PM  

Raggededge, I understand your position.

My one granddaughter is a charming tot. What I hope most for her is that she has a sweet disposition, nurtured by her parents.

If she's also well-read, a good cook, willing to get muddy when appropriate, has a talent for music and smart, that's GREAT, and if she's easy on the eyes, great, too........but......I've seen girls do really well with nothing but a sweet disposition, while watching pretty or beautiful, colleged-educated girls crash and burn in all the pitfalls of modern life.

Being the center of males orbiting during the critical 13-18 years of age has ruined just about every pretty or beautiful girl I've ever seen. Almost the best thing a father could do for his very attractive daughter would be to put her in an ugly mask during those years.

Blogger Nate February 24, 2015 1:05 PM  

this reminds me of a girl I knew... her apartment was always a wreck because she refused to clean. Because she was a professional see... and professional women don't clean.

What planwt do these people come from?

Blogger JartStar February 24, 2015 1:06 PM  

There's a lot more to being a good cook for a family than just following a recipe or even being competent at the stove and oven. Like: meal planning, efficient grocery shopping, picking and using the freshest produce, and even knowing how to preserve leftovers.

Protip for men: If the woman you are dating has an empty fridge and pantry, and rarely cooks, she won't cook in marriage and doesn't even know how to plan to cook.

Blogger Cataline Sergius February 24, 2015 1:09 PM  

Just an observation here.

You'll notice America got fat, right about the time men learned to cook.

Blogger MidKnight February 24, 2015 1:11 PM  

I lived single long enough that beyond the art of Chili and grilling (including a smoker) I've long ago graduated to starting with a chicken and ending up with soup, many other dishes, and of course the popular "let's see, we have some meat, some vegetables, some oil, and some seasonings, I can work with this.."

Blogger JDC February 24, 2015 1:12 PM  

My wife regularly uses cooking in homeschooling. It is a great way to teach following directions, fractions, measures and making good food. The problem now is my three little ones eat like horses, and it is not uncommon for me to come home to an apologetic wife saying, "Sorry, the kids ate it all." I never mind...I'm just as good with peanut butter and jelly every night, knowing my children are being well cared for.

Blogger Joshua Dyal February 24, 2015 1:14 PM  

Despite that, praise be to God that I married a woman who can cook - not just better than me, but better than my mother, better than her mother, and generally she enjoys it and enjoys improving it.

It's the only way to go. Sure, I can cook (although I don't very often, because my wife hates my cooking; it's too spicy for her taste.) Anyone can cook. Cooking really well is a skill, but cooking a decent meal? Any moron can do that. If these feminists were so proud that they couldn't do something that any moron can do, why would anyone expect them to be able to do anything else either?

Blogger Joshua Dyal February 24, 2015 1:17 PM  

Just an observation here.

You'll notice America got fat, right about the time men learned to cook.


Also about the time that the Nutrition Industry declared war on animal fat. I think that's much more likely the cause.

Anonymous MendoScot February 24, 2015 1:20 PM  

Fire + meat = dinner.

Rocket science, it ain't.

Blogger Chiva February 24, 2015 1:26 PM  

A young lady who can cook has an immediate advantage over a lady who does not cook.

I met my wife in the dorms at school. She was the only young lady in the dorm who could cook, and the only young lady who had a line of young men interested in her.

Anonymous Raggededge February 24, 2015 1:28 PM  

What planwt do these people come from?

Venus

Blogger bob k. mando February 24, 2015 1:30 PM  

AmyJ February 24, 2015 12:35 PM
But she never showed any interest in teaching me these things.



while true, this is a subset of a larger problem.

many fathers today are also disinterested in teaching their sons anything.

sometimes this is pawned off as being something that the schools are supposed to do ....

Blogger bob k. mando February 24, 2015 1:32 PM  

Cataline Sergius February 24, 2015 1:09 PM
You'll notice America got fat, right about the time men learned to cook.



you think mountain men living in the Yukon didn't know how to cook?

Anonymous Athor Pel February 24, 2015 1:33 PM  

" Cataline Sergius February 24, 2015 1:09 PM
Just an observation here.

You'll notice America got fat, right about the time men learned to cook."



Shut the hell up you fat bastard.

Is cause and effect a mystery to you?

Men have always known how to cook. What do you think happens after a successful hunt? What do you think is going on in a temple that performs blood sacrifices? Who are the majority of world class chefs?

Come on, if you're going to crack wise then do it right.

Blogger JDC February 24, 2015 1:35 PM  

I met my wife in the dorms at school. She was the only young lady in the dorm who could cook, and the only young lady who had a line of young men interested in her.

I distinctively remember in college a young gal walk into our fraternity house, she was nice looking - a little shapely, but not bad. She brought her man a plate of lasagna and chocolate chip cookies. She walked into the chapter room, kissed him on the cheek, put the food in his lap and left. The lustful gaze of the other men in the room was the same as if Claudia Shiffer had come in and taken off her top.

OpenID cailcorishev February 24, 2015 1:35 PM  

One step at a time, Jill. one.step.at.a.time.

Yeah, subtle flavors and quality ingredients are great, but the most important thing is that she can put three edible meals on the table every day. If she can't (or won't) do that, it doesn't matter how many cooking shows she's watched or how many books she's read about the science of cooking.

I've known women who took great pride in making some fancy recipe they got from a magazine, utterly trashing the kitchen and ending up exhausted from the unusual workload. But you couldn't get them to make scrambled eggs for breakfast, tuna salad for lunch, and spaghetti for dinner, all in the same day, if you twisted their arms. And that's what a man wants and needs -- good enough food on schedule at mealtimes, not an occasional fancy meal with a lot of TV dinners and takeout in between.

Anonymous Donn February 24, 2015 1:36 PM  

It was my great grandmother's cooking that caught my great grandfather. She raised six kids and all of them could cook.

Anonymous Roger February 24, 2015 1:46 PM  

On more than one occasion I've resented my Boomer mother-in-law. The woman can't cook to save her life, was never interested to learn, and was way more interested in her career. She's retired not, but still not interested. As a result her daughters can't cook - and I married one of them. Love her to bits, she tries hard, but it is so glaringly obvious that there was something missing in my wife's upbringing. She hasn't inherited her mother's disinterest, she just doesn't know what she's doing, even simple things are a mission for her. And it's taken a while to change her thinking - yes, you can heat food to make it edible and survive, but good cooking can nourish not only the body, it delights the soul too. I'm teaching her, slowly.... Funny, when my parents first got married, my father had to teach my mother how to cook as well... After that she was never a Martha Stewart, but she tried hard, and she did teach her boys as well as her girls - we were told we weren't allowed to leave home until we could cook, and we were encouraged to try often and from an early stage. As a result all her kids, even the boys, can cook well, and have a love of cooking. The contrast between the two older women and her children couldn't be clearer.

Blogger Chris Mallory February 24, 2015 1:47 PM  

A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.
-Robert A. Heinlein

Sons and daughters should both learn to cook, shoot and change a tire.

Blogger Res Ipsa February 24, 2015 1:49 PM  

Leatherwing

Great story and a great testimony to a good hearted women.

Blogger Azimus February 24, 2015 1:51 PM  

Guitar Man February 24, 2015 12:04 PM
When I was dating my wife, she knew where my heart was. Yes, I am definitely attracted to her, but it was those chocolate chip cookies that she baked from scratch that finalized the deal.


Way back on the eve of asking my wife out, I knew I liked her. But she was going to school in Fargo and I was in Milwaukee. I sought higher Counsel. I got down on my knees and said "Lord, could you give me a sign that this is the girl for me?" The next day (no exaggeration) I got a package from her in the mail - 3 dozen home-made M&M cookies and a note that I looked hungry last time she saw me. The deal was sealed.

Anonymous JohnR February 24, 2015 1:51 PM  

cail: don't forget the blowjob with that tuna sandwich

Anonymous Will Best February 24, 2015 1:53 PM  

after a while you won't like most restaurant food

Stop going to Applebee's and other chain restaurants that engage in economies of scale with the source of their ingredients.

If you want the stuff you make at home to taste as good as high quality restaurants
1) Tallow/Lard/Butter
2) Salt

In 30 years, we've gone from spaghetti being the go-to option of last resort for the culinarily-inept girl to spaghetti being too complex for the brain on feminism.

Yeah spaghetti is what we suffer through on Tuesday, so that we can afford Ribeyes on Saturday. That anybody considers it a signature dish without literally picking the tomatoes off the vine of their own garden is beyond ridiculous.

Blogger Corvinus February 24, 2015 1:54 PM  

Just an observation here.

You'll notice America got fat, right about the time men learned to cook.


Cataline, I suspect you actually mean "about the time women stopped bothering to cook".

Fixed.

Blogger SarahsDaughter February 24, 2015 1:58 PM  

but the most important thing is that she can put three edible meals on the table every day.

Here it is all about meat. One night my daughter and I were prepping an Eastern European ham and green bean soup. All my husband could see were the veggies: "You got some dead animal to go with that craziness?"

Blogger Nate February 24, 2015 1:58 PM  

"You'll notice America got fat, right about the time men learned to cook."

idiocy.

Men have never not known how to cook.

Blogger Azimus February 24, 2015 2:03 PM  

Our family has taken to having "family cooked meal" Saturdays - where we watch the morning cooking shows on PBS, or page through cookbooks, pick something we like, go pick up the ingredients in the afternoon, and spend a couple hours making the meal together. Ends up costing about the same as going out to eat but we get 2x the amount of food usually. Kids are young so we're keeping it simple, but its a great thing to do in black hole created between the end of football season and the start of baseball season. Everybody improves their cooking skills (including my wife and me), and the kids (2g, 2b) really enjoy it.

Anonymous Miserman February 24, 2015 2:03 PM  

From the linked article:

Yet the more I cooked, I also struggled with whether this was what Nani would have wanted for me – to be wearing an apron rather than just a suit.

Modern feminism wants a career woman with domesticity as her dirty little secret. 50 Shades of Cooking.

Anonymous TLM February 24, 2015 2:07 PM  

haus frau

You are spot on! My wife is a good cook, but after watching a bbq contest show a few years ago I went out and bought a Weber grill, nothing fancy. That lead to grilling meats, then smoking. Soon after I went indoors and continued by trial & error to make new meals. The wife says I've surpassed her skills in 2 years what took her at least a decade to master. IMO, the key to learning is mastering the seasoning with spices, herbs, & rubs. By developing this skill I can hardly eat out anymore. Most restaurant food tastes like sh@t now! And the idea of going to a high end steak house and paying them $50/steak for something I can do better at home is absurd. And now we both are teaching the kids these skills.

Anonymous Jill February 24, 2015 2:14 PM  

"Yeah, subtle flavors and quality ingredients are great, but the most important thing is that she can put three edible meals on the table every day. If she can't (or won't) do that, it doesn't matter how many cooking shows she's watched or how many books she's read about the science of cooking." People think simple, pure food is complicated, but it's not. It doesn't take complicated recipes or cooking shows or food science; it's just breaking things down to their constituent parts. Spaghetti, eggs, and tuna sandwiches can be very pure and basic if you buy the right ingredients--and in my twenties, I had many days where I cooked that trinity of food. But since my kids were diagnosed w/ celiac, I branched out. If it's one thing I wish I could teach younger women, it would be how simple it is NOT to cook w/ cream of mushroom soup and frozen potatoes. How to bake potatoes. Roast a bird. Grill a steak. All very simple, non time consuming stuff that doesn't involve recipes. Sorry, I'm a little OCD about food. Will shut up now.

Anonymous Sir Brian February 24, 2015 2:14 PM  

This woman is full of shit. She thinks its cute to cook inedible sludge, or to buy microwave dinners and make a show out of it while talking about her career and blaming her mother and grandmother, who were also retards.

Blogger James Dixon February 24, 2015 2:20 PM  

> Anyone can cook. Cooking really well is a skill, but cooking a decent meal? Any moron can do that.

Exactly. At yet all to large a portion of the population can't.

Blogger Marissa February 24, 2015 2:21 PM  

The internet taught me how to cook!

Anonymous Athor Pel February 24, 2015 2:26 PM  

" bob k. mando February 24, 2015 1:30 PM
AmyJ February 24, 2015 12:35 PM
But she never showed any interest in teaching me these things.


while true, this is a subset of a larger problem.

many fathers today are also disinterested in teaching their sons anything.

sometimes this is pawned off as being something that the schools are supposed to do ...."





This is a lack of accountability. Real proof of knowledge is shown in the ability to teach others what you know. Public school never does this, it never requires a student to teach younger students. This is what I mean by lack of accountability.

Sure you can take tests and get good scores but do you know the material well enough to teach someone else what you know?

Is it really a surprise that a person raised in a public school finds it alien to teach another human, even their own flesh and blood? They literally have no experience doing it.

If you want to see truly massive wastes of potential then visit a public school.

OpenID The Practical Conservative February 24, 2015 2:31 PM  

My comment was eaten, so a quick version:

White Americans used to have cooks, even the middle class ones. Home-cooked food was more common before women flooded the workforce, but it was done when people still lived with extended family or in boarding houses, so it wasn't all individual mothers cooking for individual families to the extent portrayed these days. Cooking has always been considered a special talent.

Anonymous CherynStalg February 24, 2015 2:32 PM  

"Let's not make the same mistake with our daughters and sentence them to a lifetime of bad food, obesity, and culinary frigidity."

More young women (and men) are interested and learning about cooking today than they did a decade or two decades ago primarily because of the Cooking Channel and Food Channel. There is a huge renaissance in both cooking among GenX and the Millennial generation. Add to this the resources on the net.

As for the girl who's Nani didn't teach her to cook, she shouldn't blame her Nani. My mother didn't teach me to cook and I'll take on all of you in the kitchen. If you can read, you can cook. Pick up a god damned recipe. Making a red sauce is pretty F'n easy. She's just a big, lazy complainer.

If girls don't reproduce, it won't be because their mothers (or fathers) didn't teach them how to cook.

Blogger SarahsDaughter February 24, 2015 2:32 PM  

But since my kids were diagnosed w/ celiac, I branched out.

I credit my daughter's diagnosis (12 years ago) for why I cook as well as I do. I know exactly what you're saying, don't shut up. :) We were forced to figure out the literal food chemistry in order to cook without the most abundant staple in the American diet, wheat.

Anonymous rho February 24, 2015 2:34 PM  

Men have never not known how to cook.

And sew, and clean, and do the shopping, etc. Men are often better at doing all of that, individually and all together.

What men are particularly bad at is being a wife and mother.

OpenID The Practical Conservative February 24, 2015 2:38 PM  

Cooking is time consuming and preparing three fresh meals a day has never been a white Anglo Saxon norm. It is a norm in hotter, blacker and browner parts of the world, though. It's kind of funny that the majority of comments are promoting a Latin American or Caribbean standard for home cooking rather than a white standard.

Anonymous Steve Canyon February 24, 2015 2:43 PM  

Her book is about cooking artisanal food? The only way these feminist/sjw sorts can make something that once was mundanely referred to as "cooking dinner" palatable to their delicate sensibilities is to rebadge it in some hip/trendy sounding package. Then they act like they're a revolutionary doing something novel.

Anonymous jamsco February 24, 2015 2:44 PM  

When my parents-in-law were married nearly 50 years ago, the officiating pastor said in his address (referring to my mother-in-law's education), "Gentlemen, let me give you some advice. Marry a Home-Ec major. She's got it covered."

When my Mother-in-law died a few years after Debbie and I had been married, my brother-in-law and I put an edited version of this statement into the Eulogy: "Gentlemen, let me give you some advice. Marry a Home-Ec major's daughter. She's got it covered."

Blogger LP 999/Eliza February 24, 2015 2:48 PM  

MK, no way really? is that a gen x thing?

Stateside I recall sex in the city HBO (fuck you failed cable station, still watching my seasons of Game O T, canot recall if that showtime or HBOhoes), the girls or women would brag about using their stove for storage. Idiocy but it worked ruining women taking that version of programming in..

Both parents taught me ok I guessfor our family we strive for perfection which is something I back away from, too much pressure. Meals should be relaxing and enjoyable.

I'd expect the husband to show me what he wants at the grocery store as to not waste money on missing whatever brand he favors, what time he wants it and keep the fridge stocked with things he wants. I dojt change and I dont change men. No one else is ever required to live or nourish like me.

I adhere to my philosophy regarding thinness yet men need 2 things; keep them well nourished and happy behind closed doors. If a woman trashes their house with a dirty kitchen, dirty house, dirty kids, no real meals, multi pets and no sex she is NOT a wife, she needs to be tossed out on her lazy ass.

My ways are a little possessive. I have a bit of a burr in my shoe over my kitchen, dont touch anything, dont clean, dont do the trash, go to the kitchen to eat. Have or add a well stocked mini fridge for him as well.

Superbowl parties are cooked for as i disappear.Usually hit the gym or leave for the day after everyone is happy.

My old dinner parties carry a common theme, why do people bring plastic for left overs? plastic ruins the taste of the food but whatever. I used to send them packing with left overs and treats. I would not let anyone eat on plastic, there is fine china, flutes or just everyday dinner sets.

Anonymous Trimegistus February 24, 2015 2:51 PM  

Cooking is too important to be left to women.

Anonymous Alexander February 24, 2015 2:51 PM  

I'm not buying that - northern european cuisine is much more limited owing to its climate - there isn't the variety and the length of growing season as one finds further south. So I can see how a food culture where food is something that merely must be eaten to survive can come about compared to in say, Spain or France. I mean really, if you're going to risk your life to pick up some pepper in India, things have to be pretty dire.

Add to that a country where you'll freeze to death in the wintertime is no place for lazing over an hour long lunch when the weather is good.

But that is not the same as saying that the women did not do the best they could with what they had, and did not prepare three solid meals for their working men.

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 2:57 PM  

MK, no way really? is that a gen x thing?

Yep. Since they never had the chance to learn even basic cooking, it implied that they always had a man to cook for them. And this meant status.

Anonymous Ivan Poland February 24, 2015 2:58 PM  

My mom was taught to cook from her dad who was a chef. She only had boys so she taught us how to cook. Dad had been a hunter since he was a kid and taught us how to cook wild game. My daughter started cooking when she was 6, simple stuff, now at 16 she cooks at least too full meals a week, from scratch and she is as good as me, if not better. My wife can cook very well and likes to experiment with new dishes while I like to cook game and the classics. My 8 year old son is cooking now, mostly game (roasts), but it is a start. I tell both that they need to learn how to cook. To my son: if the girl can't cook, don't waste your time. To my daughter, if the guy can't cook at least 4 or 5 meals pass. He should know some survival skills, if he can't master the basic one...how to feed one's self how is he going to be as a husband for the more complicated skills?

Anonymous CurlyQ February 24, 2015 3:02 PM  

Some of my fondest memories come from cooking, canning, and ransacking the garden at Grandmas house. My mother, stepmother, and father never really took the time to involve my sister and I in that sort of stuff, but most every time at Grandmas house we were making things in the kitchen together. Grandpa was always there, teaching us how to fish, garden, and pull pranks. Life was a positively utopian at their house for a child, and they are well loved for it.
This whole mentality of "let them enjoy their childhood, don't make them do x, y, or z" has always been a mystery to me. Not only do parents incapacitate their children by doing this, they miss out on bonding with them as well. Love grows when skills are taught.

Anonymous Noah B. February 24, 2015 3:03 PM  

"Yep. Since they never had the chance to learn even basic cooking, it implied that they always had a man to cook for them. And this meant status."

They're out there. Two of my cousins married girls who still don't cook at all.

Blogger CarpeOro February 24, 2015 3:04 PM  

" I was always told, “have your own money and don’t rely on a man.”

Except to feed her something other than what comes out of a can or the frozen food section.

" And it's not like it takes any special skill to throw some meat in the oven and some canned vegetables on the stove." Are you kidding me? Cooking is about the purity of ingredients, understanding and being able to taste distinct flavors. It's about freshness and nourishment and beauty. Sorry, one just doesn't open a can of vegetables or throw meat in the oven. That's just wrong. I'm very French in my cooking philosophy."

The idea that cooking is simple skill is like saying anyone can play chess. Sure, anyone can move a piece or boil water. Whether that leads to something worth watching or eating is another world entirely.

My own mother could hardly cook before marriage back in 1964. She learned over time. My father's mother died when he was a teen, so he had cooked for years (some things quite well). My father died when I was 15. My mother went back to school and I ended up learning to cook most of the family meals. I still cook a good portion of our dinners because my wife gets home later than I.

Not to pile on but seriously, has the one commenter never watched a cooking show? The majority of top chefs are men.

Anonymous Anonymous February 24, 2015 3:06 PM  

Of course this is a subset of an even greater problem, that is, the death of the home economy. I think Wendell Berry writes about this better than just about anyone, reclaiming the dignity of labor devoted to the modest - but wonderful - arts of farming/gardening and, yes, cooking good, nutritious meals.

At the risk of sounding like I'm simplistically longing for the "good ol' days," I'll say that, as hard as they were at times, families were largely stable, every member having a vital task. Yeah, Daddy and the boys did most of the heavy chores outside, but Mama's (and the daughters'!) contribution was no less important nor valued!

But, obviously, we're SOOO much more enlightened than our hayseed ancestors!

Regards,
David Smith

Blogger dw February 24, 2015 3:06 PM  

"Yep. Since they never had the chance to learn even basic cooking, it implied that they always had a man to cook for them. And this meant status."

The Millennial thing then would probably be she never was taught by mom (most likely a Boomer or older Xer) how to cook and laments this, so she decided to learn it herself. Perhaps it's just cause I live in the South, but most young women I know take some pride in being able to cook. They're always posting pictures of their latest homemade meal on Facebook or Instagram. It's like they're waiting for the culture to change so they can be more openly proud of doing these things again.

Anonymous Scintan February 24, 2015 3:09 PM  

Are you kidding me? Cooking is about the purity of ingredients, understanding and being able to taste distinct flavors. It's about freshness and nourishment and beauty. Sorry, one just doesn't open a can of vegetables or throw meat in the oven. That's just wrong. I'm very French in my cooking philosophy.

Any fool can cook, and it doesn't require that you have a working garden just outside your window to to it.

And, yes, it can be as simple as opening a can of vegetables and tossing some meat in the oven. That's a big part of why there's no excuse for a competent adult to be unable to adequately prepare and cook basic meals.

Blogger Laguna Beach Fogey February 24, 2015 3:09 PM  

Absolutely right.

Blogger CarpeOro February 24, 2015 3:13 PM  

"This whole mentality of "let them enjoy their childhood, don't make them do x, y, or z" has always been a mystery to me. Not only do parents incapacitate their children by doing this, they miss out on bonding with them as well. Love grows when skills are taught."

That manure is why the last few generations have learned the concept of responsibility too late. My parents had us weeding the garden, washing the floor, doing dishes, mowing the lawn and shoveling snow in our early teens. The concept of them picking up our toys? Never existed. The teaching of responsibility from an early age is one of the greatest things you can teach a child. Anything that needs to be done around a home they should be taught how to do.

Blogger Shibes Meadow February 24, 2015 3:14 PM  

JDC: literal LOL. Great story. Nothing is more attractive to a man than a woman who makes taking care of him her first priority.

I think the reason so many girls are so frantically pushed onto the career track is the Boomers' E-Z Divorce culture. So many Boomer chix ended up dumped with no skills that they became paranoid about it, and passed the fear down to us GenXers. "I know he loves you now, honey, but one day he's going to drop you for a younger model, AND THERE YOULL BE LIKE I WAS WITH A HOUSEFUL OF KIDS NO HUSBAND AND NO WAY TO EARN A LIVING BAWWW"

My wife cooked a meal for me on our very first date (an herb-roasted chicken). We are still married 23 years later.

Anonymous Leonidas February 24, 2015 3:19 PM  

More young women (and men) are interested and learning about cooking today than they did a decade or two decades ago primarily because of the Cooking Channel and Food Channel. There is a huge renaissance in both cooking among GenX and the Millennial generation. Add to this the resources on the net.

I agree with the phenomenon but disagree about the cause. I think it's mostly because of all the shitty food we grew up eating from our Boomer mothers who can't cook.

Anonymous Leonidas February 24, 2015 3:20 PM  

Boomer mothers who can't cook

Or won't, as the case may be.

Anonymous Noah B. February 24, 2015 3:26 PM  

"Any fool can cook, and it doesn't require that you have a working garden just outside your window to to it."

But a garden outside the window definitely helps. Slice some fresh, ripe Celebrity tomatoes from the garden, add sea salt and freshly cracked pepper, and you've got a real treat. Do the same thing with most store bought tomatoes and that nasty McCormick pepper, and it's mediocre. Fresh, quality ingredients are the starting point for any good meal.

Anonymous Anarchopurplism February 24, 2015 3:26 PM  

Ignorance of how to cook is odd to me. Call it quality of life mixed in with self-survival. I like to eat, consume healthy food & like variety.

My wife did not know how to cook when we got married. She does now.

Its funny though.....she is much more patient 7 follows a recipe far better than I. I might start saying my prayers if you asked me to make a smooth alfredo sauce from scratch. I typically dominate in the meat category.....especially the high-profile roasts & etc. I am a bit more inventive on creating unique dishes, however.....she recently gave up gluten & most grain, so she is being forced to experiment.

Blogger AmyJ February 24, 2015 3:30 PM  

"This whole mentality of "let them enjoy their childhood, don't make them do x, y, or z" has always been a mystery to me. Not only do parents incapacitate their children by doing this, they miss out on bonding with them as well. Love grows when skills are taught."

I agree. None of my brothers left home knowing how to work a washing machine (one didn't leave home at all). I left without knowing how to even sew a button onto a shirt or scramble eggs. I love her, but my mom really did her kids a disfavor by not teaching basic skills in order to "enjoy childhood".

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 3:34 PM  

Interesting, you don't have that word to describe this sociological phenomenon in English. We call it "uusavuttomuus", which would translate to something like "neo-ineptness"

Anonymous Stickwick February 24, 2015 3:35 PM  

Marissa: The internet taught me how to cook!

Yeah, there really is no excuse with all of the resources out there. My mom taught me the basics, but I sharpened my skills and developed my own style by watching cooking shows and looking up stuff on the Internet.

I love to cook and bake. The planning, the shopping, the execution, are all part of the enjoyment. It goes back to childhood -- my mom would literally sing with joy in the kitchen, she loved cooking and baking so much. My daughter is only 14 months old, but I'm already making the grocery store and the kitchen central parts of her existence.

The funny thing is, even as a professional woman, I just feel contempt towards women who can't do this stuff. It's like a man who can't chop wood or change a tire. What good are you?

Blogger AmyJ February 24, 2015 3:35 PM  

Disservice, I mean

Anonymous Scintan February 24, 2015 3:37 PM  

But a garden outside the window definitely helps. Slice some fresh, ripe Celebrity tomatoes from the garden, add sea salt and freshly cracked pepper, and you've got a real treat. Do the same thing with most store bought tomatoes and that nasty McCormick pepper, and it's mediocre. Fresh, quality ingredients are the starting point for any good meal.

I have a working garden, and I love using my own grown produce. However, the notion that I could not make "any good meal" without, as you put it, fresh, quality ingredients is simply not true.

I can make a damn fine meal with grocery store ingredients, and I do it all the time.

As an aside, your post, and the posts of others in this thread, are great examples of the way in which modern western man has made pretty much everything an issue of snobbery. From beer snobs to "organic" snobs, to pretty much everything else, we've become a world of people who feel the need to 'other' pretty much everything that falls even the slightest bit outside of their chosen circles.

Blogger Res Ipsa February 24, 2015 3:53 PM  

I've never known a man whose wife cooked, cleaned, was faithful and kept him happy in the bedroom to divorce his wife.

Anonymous Fullerton February 24, 2015 3:57 PM  

"The funny thing is, even as a professional woman, I just feel contempt towards women who can't do this stuff. It's like a man who can't chop wood or change a tire. What good are you?"

I wonder if these women will be able to go on given your contempt??!!

You are an idiot. BAsic cooling is simple. Being able to cool well neither makes or breaks a woman. Nor a man. And why the hell would a man care to know how to chop wood unless he absolutely had to??

You are an idiot!

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 3:59 PM  

And why the hell would a man care to know how to chop wood unless he absolutely had to??

Because that is so utterly basic that the only explanation for not knowing how, is almost mortal levels of cowardice.

Blogger Res Ipsa February 24, 2015 3:59 PM  

Side note for those reading who aren't food people, cooking is about ingredients, recipe, technique and tastes. I don't understand what people mean when they say they don't know how to cook. If you know your tastes its a matter of finding a recipe and ingredients and putting it together. If you are unsure how to put it together its a matter of technique. There are many good recipes available, and learning technique can be as simple as checking out a video from the library or watching some samples on the net.

We live in an age where "I don't know how" is code for "I don't care enough to Google it".

Anonymous pseudotsuga February 24, 2015 4:00 PM  

From above: "That anybody considers [spaghetti] a signature dish without literally picking the tomatoes off the vine of their own garden is beyond ridiculous."
I take it that the poster of that sentence has never had fresh-made pasta, made earlier that day from semolina flour. There is a TASTE to that pasta that dried grocery-store pasta will never match, even if it's pasta imported from Italy.
Throw that pasta into some good olive oil (not the blended supermarket-brand tasteless stuff--get some single variety that has some spice or fruitiness to it) with fresh garlic, top it with crisp fried pancetta or guanciale (which are the flavors that American bacon is trying, but failing, to be), some pepper, and parmesan cheese (no, no, no--don't shake it from the can!).
That's some mighty good eating right there. Sure, you can throw in some tomatoes fresh from the garden, but if they're not in season, don't bother with them. Olive oil, garlic,and bacon are always in season!

Blogger Res Ipsa February 24, 2015 4:01 PM  

Fullerton

Do you know you are insulting one of the most educated and intellectually elite women you are likely to ever meet?

Anonymous pseudotsuga February 24, 2015 4:08 PM  

"And why the hell would a man care to know how to chop wood unless he absolutely had to??"
Because if he cannot do so, when he HAS to, people may die--either from exposure or from hunger. That's a good reason right there--the electricity ain't always gonna be on, friend. Men and women both should know basic survival skills. My mom knew how to use a splitting maul. Dad could fell 'em, mom and oldest brother could split 'em, and us littler kids stacked 'em on the truck.

Anonymous Jill February 24, 2015 4:09 PM  

When I used the term "fresh" I meant from the grocery store--like a regular grocery store, not a Whole Foods. I've had gardens, but they take a lot of time and effort to maintain. People tend to think in the fallacy of the excluded middle. There is a whole world between all organic/import/farmers market/fresh from the garden snobbery and Hamburger Helper. As far as the snobbery about everything, it falls under the category of post-modernist irony I can't stand. If I have any snobbery at all, it's for real food that is enjoyable to eat. Food that won't make you cripplingly ill after you've eaten it. That's why French cuisine appeals to me, as it's so very basic (their home cuisine, not high restaurant cuisine).

Anonymous Noah B. February 24, 2015 4:09 PM  

As an aside, your post, and the posts of others in this thread, are great examples of the way in which modern western man has made pretty much everything an issue of snobbery. From beer snobs to "organic" snobs, to pretty much everything else, we've become a world of people who feel the need to 'other' pretty much everything that falls even the slightest bit outside of their chosen circles.

To me, looking for ways to improve is a good thing. If you choose to see that as snobbery, that's fine by me. Most of what I cook comes from the store too, but it often doesn't compare to what I can grow on my own.

Anonymous sir brian February 24, 2015 4:13 PM  

Ive never been in a situation where I would have to chop wood. Women however are in situations where they need to eat multiple times a day every day of their lives and are surrounded by the tiols and appliances needed to heat edible things.

The problem with a woman that cant cook is her persoanlity. She most likeu has many other terrible defects

Anonymous Fullerton February 24, 2015 4:13 PM  

"Because that is so utterly basic that the only explanation for not knowing how, is almost mortal levels of cowardice."

Bullshit...One can easily go through life never having chopped wood, wanting to chop wood or even thinking about chopping wood and do just fine. What is this, 1802?

Holy shit!

Blogger Doom February 24, 2015 4:14 PM  

I have learned to cook myself. Portions? Nutrition? I stick with meat, mostly, and it has served me well. But I do know how to do veggies. Now, that works solo. However, if I happen to yet obtain a suitable woman to make into a wife, I will teach her how to cook. I'll still grill meat from time to time, but I will teach her how to actually cook, and depend on her to learn portion and nutrition. It won't be a request. None of them know, anymore, how to cook. Just keeping their booger hooks off a cell phone will be a monster trick. Breaking the damn thing every time I suspect it has interfered with some wifely function will probably be required. Going without, from time to time, and having to buy new out of her pocket money, will... over time... fix that addiction.

The only way to get good at cooking is experience. If you want to teach her to cook chicken, buy ten chickens, teach her how to butcher it (economy is part of it), then have her fry half a chicken at a time, over and over, just tasting. When she has it right... buy another ten chickens to get that ingrained. Do this with several main meals. Then let her bring in some foods she (sort of) knows or remembers. Some things have to be tossed, if they are absolutely repugnant. Many women who have had some training, were trained using junk foods, premade crap, and stuff not fit for dog or man. And, some things are just not suitable. Veto the crap and ugly stuff.

Or, shut up and take it. You get what you earn.

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 4:15 PM  

Bullshit...One can easily go through life never having chopped wood, wanting to chop wood or even thinking about chopping wood and do just fine. What is this, 1802?

But when you come across such a situation, you should pick up the hatchet and start hitting without thinking twice about it. If your reaction to the situation is anything other than that, you are a little girl inside.

Anonymous Fullerton February 24, 2015 4:15 PM  

"Do you know you are insulting one of the most educated and intellectually elite women you are likely to ever meet?"

And all the evidence here is to the contrary. If she's so "educated and intellectually elite" she should act like it.

Anonymous Athor Pel February 24, 2015 4:16 PM  

" Fullerton February 24, 2015 3:57 PM
...
You are an idiot!"



You're a funny man.

___________


"ScintanFebruary 24, 2015 3:37 PM
...
As an aside, your post, and the posts of others in this thread, are great examples of the way in which modern western man has made pretty much everything an issue of snobbery. From beer snobs to "organic" snobs, to pretty much everything else, we've become a world of people who feel the need to 'other' pretty much everything that falls even the slightest bit outside of their chosen circles."



But we're right!


and yes I am laughing right now

Anonymous A.B. Prosper February 24, 2015 4:18 PM  

Happily I am out of the meet market since all the unmarried White women top at at a solid 5 on a good day with Vanna White levels of pancake makeup, if they aren't meth heads anyway .The local LDS women exempted.

However were I still playing the game . What good would a woman be who wouldn't cook. I can cook, keep house, and steward a house as well as any woman and do all the things any man needs to do as well.

If she isn't interested in doing the things I either am not good at (mothering) or don't care to do (cooking) she doesn't bring anything to the table. Now I don't mind splitting the kitchen chores, I make 10 meals,She makes 10 meals we eat out once but she had better make up for it somehow.

No doubt if any feminist types weren't afraid to read the blog, I'm sure they'd melt down, but seriously, what do won't cook women even bring the table?

Alright one caveat, if she was young and very attractive and loyal and smart and our sex interests synced very well, well alright. That's something I hope though if we were a couple by the time were married along time and both getting on there , I'd still hope she'd learn to cook.

Blogger Res Ipsa February 24, 2015 4:19 PM  

And all the evidence here is to the contrary. If she's so "educated and intellectually elite" she should act like it.

But how would you know the difference?

Anonymous Fullerton February 24, 2015 4:23 PM  

"But when you come across such a situation, you should pick up the hatchet and start hitting without thinking twice about it. If your reaction to the situation is anything other than that, you are a little girl inside."

We are talking about chopping wood here. It's not as though it's as complicated as walking and talking at the same time.

Anonymous Fullerton February 24, 2015 4:25 PM  

"But how would you know the difference?"

How? Well, one piece of really good evidence is this, from her: ""The funny thing is, even as a professional woman, I just feel contempt towards women who can't do this stuff. It's like a man who can't chop wood or change a tire. What good are you?"

Chopping wood?? Really? Good God....Now the term "intellectually elite" is being dumbed down!

Blogger SarahsDaughter February 24, 2015 4:25 PM  

We are talking about chopping wood here. It's not as though it's as complicated as walking and talking at the same time.

I think this was Stickwick's point.

Blogger Josh February 24, 2015 4:28 PM  

The Practical ConservativeFebruary 24, 2015 2:38 PM
Cooking is time consuming and preparing three fresh meals a day has never been a white Anglo Saxon norm. It is a norm in hotter, blacker and browner parts of the world, though. It's kind of funny that the majority of comments are promoting a Latin American or Caribbean standard for home cooking rather than a white standard.


Given that a very small percentage of Anglo Saxons had slaves or servants throughout history, I think you're incorrect.

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 4:28 PM  

We are talking about chopping wood here. It's not as though it's as complicated as walking and talking at the same time.

It is. And yet, your reaction to Stickwick was this:

And why the hell would a man care to know how to chop wood unless he absolutely had to??

You are an idiot!

Anonymous Sun Xhu February 24, 2015 4:30 PM  

I think this was Stickwick's point.

Yeah, but this guy is obviously an intellectual midget who just likes to get his panties in a twist. He is incapable of any form of extrapolation or nuance, and is purely a knee-jerk SJW.

Blogger Josh February 24, 2015 4:32 PM  

Happily I am out of the meet market since all the unmarried White women top at at a solid 5 on a good day with Vanna White levels of pancake makeup, if they aren't meth heads anyway

Where do you live?

Anonymous ThirdMonkey February 24, 2015 4:33 PM  

My wife was raised by a single career mother, but spent the summers at her grandmother's ranch, learning to cook for hungry cowboys and tending the massive garden that fed them. Even though we have been gone for 17+ years, her family still begs her to come back every summer to cook for brandings because her siblings and cousins don't cook and didn't marry women who cook, either. She has always made things from scratch, cans and freezes our garden veggies, and keeps us well fed. This afternoon she is making homemade applesauce for the baby with help from our 6 yr old daughter and two neighbor girls, one 14, the other 20. She caught my attention with her pretty smile, but I stuck around for the meatloaf, stuffed sopapillas, and pecan pie.

Anonymous Leonidas February 24, 2015 4:35 PM  

And why the hell would a man care to know how to chop wood unless he absolutely had to??

Wait, was that a serious question?

Real men know how to chop wood.

We also know how to fetch the chainsaw when we realize that it's been so long since we chopped wood that we've completely underestimated how long it's going to take and there's an ice storm coming on.

Always know how to do it by hand, but never be afraid to fetch the power tools.

Anonymous Sun Xhu February 24, 2015 4:36 PM  

but I stuck around for the meatloaf, stuffed sopapillas, and pecan pie.

So many women cannot seem to comprehend the value of just cooking a good meatloaf. They tend to want to be "creative", and end up over-thinking the process and producing something no sane man wants to eat.

Blogger Res Ipsa February 24, 2015 4:36 PM  

Dude its just her opinion.

Some things are so basic that anyone should be able to do them. Grilling pork chops isn't in the same category of as a Beef Wellington. Frying fish isn't the same as my coquille st. Jacques, but everyone should be able to grill, boil or bake. She has no use for someone who can't do basic stuff.

Neither do I.

Blogger SarahsDaughter February 24, 2015 4:42 PM  

Anyone ever see that Friend's episode with the Ben Stiller cameo appearance?

Step away from the duck, Fullerton.

Anonymous Scintan February 24, 2015 4:47 PM  

So many women cannot seem to comprehend the value of just cooking a good meatloaf. They tend to want to be "creative", and end up over-thinking the process and producing something no sane man wants to eat.

I've been in rooms where people almost came to blows over how to make a so-called 'real' meatloaf. Arguments over fillers, meat choices, ketchup v. tomato sauce, and the like, were about as vicious as it gets short of throwing down.

Good times...

Blogger Josh February 24, 2015 4:52 PM  

I've been in rooms where people almost came to blows over how to make a so-called 'real' meatloaf. Arguments over fillers, meat choices, ketchup v. tomato sauce, and the like, were about as vicious as it gets short of throwing down.

Can't be as viscous as the Great Bean / Beanless Chili War.

Blogger Zach February 24, 2015 4:53 PM  

What Cail said. It doesn't have to be haute cuisine - good enough is good enough.

The logistics of managing a pantry and a meal plan for 3 squares a day, every day, for everyone is key.

Happily, I married a woman who is good at that.

And teach the kids to cook. If you have teenagers and can't say "dinner needs to be at six, this is what we have, recipe is in the cookbook" and have it happen, why not?

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 4:54 PM  

That's easy. Chili has exactly one mandatory ingredient, and it's chili.

Blogger Tim February 24, 2015 4:58 PM  

Chop wood? Not unless you mean split wood, that I will do, but cutting wood is a job for a chainsaw. Crazy to try to chop wood, even in pre power tool days saws were used (my father in law actually taught me to use a two man crosscut saw, but we just sawed a few pieces by hand for my education lol, chainsaws are a blessing from God, as are hydraulic splitters, the savings in labor are unbelievable until you have actually done it both ways). I do have an axe that I use to chop limbs when camping, but when putting up wood for the winter a chainsaw is the only way to go. (Or for clearing a neighborhood road after a winter storm, my brother and I and the two wives and one nephew cleared a couple of Lake Tansi roads to dig out my other nephew and his 8 months pregnant wife Sunday, without a chainsaw would have been impossible for days, with two chainsaws it was 3 hours work.

Anonymous ThirdMonkey February 24, 2015 5:00 PM  

My only complaint about my wife is that she puts beans in her chili. I never refer to it as chili, it is frito pie filling.

The other day, I took a road trip with a friend of mine, who is a Free Methodist preacher. I shared some cookies that my wife had made for the trip, and his response after the fourth one was, "Man, these cookies will F@&k you up!"

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 5:02 PM  

Chop wood? Not unless you mean split wood

Splitting wood that has already been dried, obviously.

Blogger njartist February 24, 2015 5:05 PM  

@Leonidas February 24, 2015 4:35 PM
Real men know how to chop wood.
How much wood would a real man chop if a real man chopped wood; would it be a much wood as a woodchuck could chuck wood if a woodchuck chucked wood?

Hey, you knew that was coming.

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 5:10 PM  

A hatchet has only two usages here: Splitting dry wood, or chasing your wife. Any other usage didn't even occur to me.

Blogger S1AL February 24, 2015 5:20 PM  

This comments that would be the funniest thing I've read all day, except that I read Larry's fisking earlier.

Also discovering how rare it is that my wife and I both come from families where both parents know how to cook... It's like a whole different world, apparently.

Blogger S1AL February 24, 2015 5:21 PM  

*comments thread

Anonymous pseudotsuga February 24, 2015 5:23 PM  

Markku, you never use a hatchet to split wood--it's too small. I don't know what you Finnish folks use on your birch trees up there, but surely you don't try to split cut logs (about 1 - 2 feet in height, 1-2 feet diameter) with your puny little hatchet! From heaviest to lightest you have a splitting maul, an axe, a hand axe, and finally a hatchet. (We're going to ignore double-bladed felling axes, like my father had, because chainsaws do it so much better and faster.)

Anonymous A.B. Prosper February 24, 2015 5:24 PM  

Josh. I live in the California Desert Its only about 33%-40% White for starters. I wasn't quite fair, some of the Christian women might be OK if they don't have kids from a previous divorce or the like and i met a nice Ukrainian Barista too.

Really its a good chunk of me not caring, I fully admit to preferring to choose how I spend my free time over catering to a woman or chasing after a woman who has basically very little to offer me. And my sex drive is happily very easily managed, It doesn't drive me at all which is IMO a blessing.

while I don't use the term MGTOW but I do identify with it and while its not virtuous, I'm not interested in saving this rotten civilization either. At least I'm not a degenerate, I even gave up porn long ago.

That said I have nibbles at work in a much Whiter area and might be more interested then.

Anonymous Salt February 24, 2015 5:24 PM  

"Man, these cookies will F@&k you up!"

Used that special Colorado style butter, huh?

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 5:25 PM  

Ah, yes. I see. Checked wikipedia. Wrong word.

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 5:27 PM  

I thought axes were only for killing humans. But yes, I was talking about a splitting axe.

Anonymous Leonidas February 24, 2015 5:32 PM  

Chop wood? Not unless you mean split wood

I assumed that that was... assumed. What idiot would try to cut wood with an axe when better tools are available? Oh, right, the idiots described above who don't know how to chop wood.

Blogger Matamoros February 24, 2015 5:37 PM  

I remember the old Amish axiom: Lovin' gets old, but Cookin' don't.

Anonymous Salt February 24, 2015 5:40 PM  

I've heard people use chop wood. Know what they mean saying it too. Hand me a hatchet, except camping, and it's a deal breaker.

Anonymous MendoScot February 24, 2015 6:02 PM  

Wood. Burnt down to coals. Meat on top, close but not too close. With all the fat that drops and hisses.
You can throw veggies on if you haven't left your mother's tit.
As meat is just concentrated veggies.

Anonymous Noah B. February 24, 2015 6:05 PM  

"That's easy. Chili has exactly one mandatory ingredient, and it's chili."

I'm almost afraid to ask but... is there Mexican food in Finland (or anywhere in Europe, for that matter)?

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 6:07 PM  

There are pathetic attempts of Mexican food all around, but as far as I know, there is just one authentic Mexican restaurant in Helsinki.

Blogger pbuxton February 24, 2015 6:12 PM  

If she had *understood* Camille Paglia, she would have learned to cook.

Anonymous Salt February 24, 2015 6:13 PM  

Got a Taco Bell do you, Markku?

[ducks]

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 6:25 PM  

Nope. We just got Burger King about half a year ago, and Dunkin' Donuts just announced that it will be next, but no plans to that effect have been heard from Taco Bell.

Anonymous MendoScot February 24, 2015 6:32 PM  

Good grief.

I used to cut wood for a manor with 17 fireplaces - two of which could take 6 foot logs.

You chop wood with whatever you have at hand, including your feet.

You can start a fire with a log and a couple of matches.

Provided your fingers are strong enough.

The question is, how tender do you like your meat?

Blogger dw February 24, 2015 6:36 PM  

You know, I've been to many a bad Burger King, McDonald's, and Wendy's, but I've yet to find a Taco Bell that screwed it up.

Anonymous Noah B. February 24, 2015 6:40 PM  

That's because Taco Bell can't possibly be made any worse.

Blogger bob k. mando February 24, 2015 7:03 PM  

Athor Pel February 24, 2015 2:26 PM
If you want to see truly massive wastes of potential then visit a public school.


yes. amongst the many problems with modern ed ( because the parochial schools use the exact same methodology taught and administered by people with degrees from the exact same colleges as pub ed teachers ), this may be the worst sin.

this would be an aspect of the old one room school house ( older students helping teach younger, while the one / two teachers function more as managers ) that most would miss.

the obvious advantage of a ( properly run ) one room school house would be mitigation of bullying. it's quite easy for a retard who's been held back multiple grades to beat up on kids who are 2-4 years younger than he/she is. when that same retard doesn't get artificially segregated with biologically younger children but, instead, has to face upper classmen who might be 10 years older than him?

it wouldn't put a complete stop to bullying. nothing ever could. but we wouldn't have the metastasized, compartmentalized stupidity we have now.



The Practical Conservative February 24, 2015 2:38 PM
Cooking is time consuming and preparing three fresh meals a day has never been a white Anglo Saxon norm.



homie be crack smokin.

all 8 of my great grandparents were majority Deutsch farmer ( to such an extent that they all grew up speaking PennDutch ) and they ALL got three meals a day every day.

when the men are up at 5am milking 365 days a year, they don't have much patience for a woman who won't put breakfast on the table by 7am.

during the summer, lunch is usually a cold meal, true. that doesn't mean they didn't eat.



Markku February 24, 2015 3:59 PM
Because that is so utterly basic that the only explanation for not knowing how, is almost mortal levels of cowardice.


beware to keep your backswing clear.




Fullerton February 24, 2015 4:15 PM
And all the evidence here is to the contrary. If she's so "educated and intellectually elite" she should act like it.



shhhhhh, everybody be vewwy, vewwy quiet.

Fullerton is social proofing us as to how badass he is.



Fullerton February 24, 2015 4:23 PM
It's not as though it's as complicated as walking and talking at the same time.


says the guy who, thus far, hasn't managed anything exceeding the intellectual equivalent of single finger, hunt-n-peck typing.

Anonymous Salt February 24, 2015 7:13 PM  

That's because Taco Bell can't possibly be made any worse.

It's called Tex-Mex. Border food the peasants like.

Anonymous CK February 24, 2015 7:13 PM  

"Nope. We just got Burger King about half a year ago, and Dunkin' Donuts just announced that it will be next, but no plans to that effect have been heard from Taco Bell."

Whoever does open one in Finland is going to be racking in the dough.

Anonymous CK February 24, 2015 7:16 PM  

A Taco Time in Finland would also rake in the dough.

Anonymous CK February 24, 2015 7:22 PM  

"I still remember the pride in their voice, when they pronounced that they could not cook at all."

How perverse.

Anonymous tiredofitall February 24, 2015 7:30 PM  

"Sons and daughters should both learn to cook, shoot and change a tire." - Chris Mallory

Seems like that'd be one chewy meal, but if you put enough ketchup on it I might give cooked tire a chance,

OpenID cailcorishev February 24, 2015 7:40 PM  

I still remember the pride in their voice, when they pronounced that they could not cook at all.

Reminds me of people who proudly state they've never read an entire book unless forced to for school. I can understand that it's true for some people; I just don't understand why you'd brag about it.

Anonymous Mike M. February 24, 2015 7:43 PM  

I'm shaking my head...when I got my own place, my first purchases were a Bible...and a Betty Crocker cookbook.

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 7:43 PM  

As I said later on:

Yep. Since they never had the chance to learn even basic cooking, it implied that they always had a man to cook for them. And this meant status.

Blogger Dennis February 24, 2015 8:01 PM  

"Men have never not known how to cook."

It's possible that it's just because I've never seen it, but aside from the grill, none of the men I knew growing up in my father's (boomer) generation cooked. Granted, they were generally masculine men that worked all week and their wives stayed home and raised the kids/cooked. My mom taught me to cook, my dad taught me to work.

Anonymous Stickwick February 24, 2015 9:18 PM  

Fullerton sez: You are an idiot. BAsic cooling is simple. Being able to cool well neither makes or breaks a woman.

This would normally be a good opportunity to discuss the concept of irony, but I have a feeling the point would be lost.

Tim: Chop wood? Not unless you mean split wood, that I will do, but cutting wood is a job for a chainsaw.

Is there a difference? Maybe it's a Canadianism, or maybe I don't know 'cuz I've never had to do it, but I've just always referred to it as chopping wood.

Markku: A hatchet has only two usages here: Splitting dry wood, or chasing your wife.

?! You mean, if she forgets the olut and the makkara?

Anonymous farmer Tom February 24, 2015 9:18 PM  

I gotta throw my two cents in on this thread.

My wife is the college graduate in our house. I went to some college, never finished. After college I lived with my folks for a couple of years trying to sink all my money into getting started farming.
So when I got married, I had done little cooking, and what cooking my wife had done was very utilitarian. Small meals for just her.
She started a new job after we married and so often I would be around late in the afternoon before she would be. I started raiding my mothers cookbook and trying to make something I enjoyed for supper.

My mom is a great cook. Not fancy food, but great filling, good tasting, enjoyable food. She often cooked large meals for extended family on holidays and had special guests from church or missionaries at our house constantly.
My wife's mother on the other hand is a cook, a utilitarian cook. She made edible food. Nothing special, often bland. You could eat it, but it was never special.

So I raided my mothers recipe files, tried a few new ones on my own and encouraged my wife to try the same recipes when she had time to cook.

Fast forward 20 years. I no longer work for myself, so I have little time to cook. But my wife has become a fabulous cook. We never have guests that she isn't being complemented on her cooking, and being asked for recipes and cooking tips.

As a sort of hobby we now do cooking for wedding rehearsals or even for large groups of people, and always she is complimented on her ability to cook.

Even her own mother has complimented her on her cooking.

Blogger Nate February 24, 2015 9:22 PM  

"Granted, they were generally masculine men that worked all week and their wives stayed home and raised the kids/cooked. My mom taught me to cook, my dad taught me to work."

ya blithering idiot. The greatest chefs in the world have ALWAYS been men.

Anonymous Chief_Tuscaloosa_welcome_white_man February 24, 2015 9:27 PM  

Dated a Mexican lawyer who actually tried to argue with me that eating out was cheaper in the long run than cooking because "economies of scale." The sex was amazing, though. Which is why it went six months longer than it should have. I'm now married and my WASP wife wasn't a great cook at first, but like Bill Murray in "Stripes" said she "was willing to learn." Don't miss the Mexican chick at all.

Blogger Markku February 24, 2015 9:27 PM  

?! You mean, if she forgets the olut and the makkara?

Needs there be a reason? A drunk Finnish husband chasing the family with an axe is one of those archetypical Finnish scenes. Something to make paintings and songs about, not something to question.

Blogger Nate February 24, 2015 9:29 PM  

also... these folks saying that anyone and everyone can split wood... No. They can't.

You think jerry fucking seinfeld can swing an axe? how about woody allen? you think he can swing an axe?

The Jacksonville Jaquars decided "chopping wood" was gonna be their work motto under jack del rio... so he got a big log and put in in the locker room. Everyone was supposed to take a swing at it.

First round... the kicker damned near cut his own leg off.

Blogger JaimeInTexas February 24, 2015 9:33 PM  

1) Cook steak on hard wood fire. Gently fan the ash away and place the steak right on the wood. Since there is no air gap, no flame up. 5 minutes per side, depending on thickness, for a rare finish. Best way to cook a steak.
2) Don't you love feminist women? They do not learn how to cook, so they have to depend on a man for theur meals.
3) Men who kill for their meat, or toil for a harvest, also know how to prepare and cook.

Blogger SirHamster February 24, 2015 9:35 PM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger JaimeInTexas February 24, 2015 9:35 PM  

Nate, that is funny, in a sad way. Knowing how to swing an axe to split wood has other benefits.

Blogger SirHamster February 24, 2015 9:40 PM  

A hatchet has only two usages here: Splitting dry wood, or chasing your wife. Any other usage didn't even occur to me.

Is that a sign of affection for the wife? Hard to tell from across the pond.

Anonymous Stickwick February 24, 2015 9:50 PM  

Markku: Needs there be a reason? A drunk Finnish husband chasing the family with an axe is one of those archetypical Finnish scenes. Something to make paintings and songs about, not something to question.

Ah, of course. My experience (not specifically with my husband, mind you) has been more along the lines of drunken shouting from the kitchen table, and the kids finally locking the father in the kitchen. But I can see how an axe might figure in there.

Blogger bob k. mando February 24, 2015 9:55 PM  

Stickwick February 24, 2015 9:18 PM
This would normally be a good opportunity to discuss the concept of irony, but I have a feeling the point would be lost.



aw, go on.

he won't get it, but everybody else will.



Stickwick February 24, 2015 9:18 PM
Is there a difference?



if you want to get finicky, 'chop' would be to cut the wood to lengths or drop the tree.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/chop?s=t

splitting would be what you do with the logs *after* you've sectioned them to size for your fireplace so they'll burn quicker and hotter.

however, in the vernacular, if we're goin out choppin, like as not we're splitting. because, as he pointed out, you're going to chainsaw the logs to length ( crosscut ).

you don't chainsaw for splitting ( with grain ) because
1 - it wastes wood
2 - it chews up your chain for no good reason




Nate February 24, 2015 9:29 PM
You think jerry fucking seinfeld can swing an axe? how about woody allen? you think he can swing an axe?
...
First round... the kicker damned near cut his own leg off.



kickers, Seinfeld and Woody are 'real men'?

Blogger Shibes Meadow February 24, 2015 9:59 PM  

Please note that I am a native Texan. Chili con carne is our national dish. Outsiders have no more right to define "chili" than a non-Japanese has to define "tonkatsu ramen".

Rule 1. Chili is made from beef, beef tallow (or other fat), chiles, masa, various spices (e.g., cumin) and water. A dish made from anything other than these ingredients may be called "chili-style [soup, rattlesnake, etc.]" or the like, but never chile. My wife (whose folks are from Oklahoma, for Pete's sake) is careful to always call her chili-like dish with beans in it "chili stew", not "chili". "Chili with beans" does not and cannot exist.

Rule 2. Never add the cheese, onions, or other garnishes to chile until after it is served.

Rule 3. Chili is a dish in itself. It is not a sauce, a garnish, a gravy, or a topping. It is a stand-alone food. Never serve chili on top of rice, noodles, hot dogs, etc. ("Chili dogs" are topped with chili sauce, not chili.) The only food which may legitimately be topped with chili is an enchilada (which means "topped with chili").

Rule 4. That stuff they serve in Cincinnati is NOT chili.

Rule 5. Canned "chili" is for emergency use only. Avoid it unless it's a matter of physical survival. And even then...

Finally, a protip from personal experience: NEVER eat "Mexican food" or "Tex-Mex" in Europe. The horror... the horror...

In fact, one should never eat "Tex-Mex" (which is just Texas food, by the way -- fajitas and the like are not part of Mexican cuisine) anywhere north or east of the Red River. It's like "gay marriage" -- an unnatural abomination that no moral man can abide.

Anonymous Trimegistus February 24, 2015 10:15 PM  

You also don't chop wood because that is about the hardest job there is.

I cut my firewood with a chainsaw and split it with a maul. I have an old axe, and just for fun I tried to chop a fallen pine (no use as firewood). Even though pine is pretty soft wood, chopping through a tree with an axe is incredibly hard work. Each swing cuts away a tiny chip, and you're hacking your way across the grain. I got about six inches into the trunk over maybe fifteen minutes of hard swinging.

When you hear about pioneers clearing land with axes, you should be impressed. Those men were iron.

Blogger bob k. mando February 24, 2015 10:22 PM  

it's more impressive that they pulled the stumps and root balls with draft animals and picks/shovels than that they cut the trees with an axe.

that's the REAL backbreaking work.

and you cannot plow until after the stumps are pulled up.

lucky farmers got ahold of dynamite.

Anonymous Trimegistus February 24, 2015 10:39 PM  

I've cleared some small stumps in my time, and yes, that is backbreaking work. Though a brace of oxen might have made the job easier.

Anonymous Dennis February 24, 2015 10:50 PM  

"ya blithering idiot."

That made me laugh, I'm just going to assume you're using it in the friendliest of ways.


"The greatest chefs in the world have ALWAYS been men."

I definitely agree here. I'm basing this merely on my experiences, but the vast majority of men that perform manual labor don't have the luxury of becoming great cooks. Like I said, my mom taught me, and I like to think I'm pretty darn good. I had to teach my wife, because her mom overcooked and under-seasoned everything. But I work compressed work weeks and she's a SAHM, so she cooks during my work week, and we take turns on my weekend.

Blogger bob k. mando February 24, 2015 11:05 PM  

Trimegistus February 24, 2015 10:39 PM
I've cleared some small stumps in my time, and yes, that is backbreaking work. Though a brace of oxen might have made the job easier.



i've used an excavator, both to pull trees down and to dig up the root balls, for house pads in Fla. the variance in effort between the two tasks is easily an order of magnitude. maybe two.

i can pull a 20 ton ( that's 40 THOUSAND pounds ) machine up on the toe of the tracks and not budge some of the larger root balls without a butt load of digging, root shearing, and stump rocking.

and that's in Fla sand.

there ain't no ( none machine ) way to clear Indiana clay without a wheelbarrow to carry your balls around in. i don't give a damn how many draft animals you have.

palm trees are easy ( and not really trees ). oaks are a bitch to pull, not bad to dispose of. brazilian peppers are easy to pull up, hard to pack into the dump because they grow in all kinds of crazy directions and won't stack very compactly.

Anonymous Stickwick February 24, 2015 11:17 PM  

bob k. mando: aw, go on.

All right, then. Irony: it's like goldy and bronzy, only it's made of iron.

(And, thanks for clarifying on the chopping vs. splitting issue.)

Anonymous Discard February 24, 2015 11:41 PM  

Trimegistus: I have read that historians have determined, from bookkeeping accounts in logging camps, that old time loggers ate 8000-9000 calories per day. Takes a lot of work to burn through that much food in a day.

Anonymous Lulabelle February 25, 2015 12:11 AM  

"Rule 1. Chili is made from beef, beef tallow (or other fat), chiles, masa, various spices "

Who in the hell puts masa in their chili?!? Masa is for tamales.

*shakes head*

Anonymous Rolf February 25, 2015 12:35 AM  

Trimegustus - you must be using a seriously dull axe, or not have a well-practiced technique, to only get six inches into pine in 15 minutes. You should be able to drop a 12-inch maple in less time. Logging / land-clearing is seriously hard physical labor. You want to lose weight? Go clear an acre or two of trees by hand. Even with a chainsaw it can be pretty brutal. If you have some small stumps, though, it can be a great way to keep your energetic 8-year old boy with a visiting friend occupied for an afternoon of playing with shovels and mattocks so they sleep well (ask me how I know :-)

Yes, root-balls are a serious pain. Power tools, chemicals, explosives, and fire are the preferred methods. All are fun, but not equally useful (depends on how close the house / barn / septic / etc are).

Cooking - it's a life skill. Basic competence in the kitchen is not about feminism, it's about being a bloody adult. Being good at something that is necessary for your self and family is not something to be ashamed of; to even consider that it might be a fair question says you are hanging out with the wrong people, not ones that have YOUR best interests at heart.

Blogger Eric February 25, 2015 1:22 AM  

There is a huge renaissance in both cooking among GenX and the Millennial generation. Add to this the resources on the net.

Welllllll, there's a huge renaissance in cooking interest among GenXers and Millennials. But I don't know how much actual cooking they do. They watch the cooking shows and go all out every other Saturday with some fancy dish, but they don't do much in the way of everyday meal preparation.

I may not be getting a representative sample, but people in my social circle all have giant kitchens with bazillion BTU top-of-the-line Viking ranges... which only get used a couple times a month.

Blogger Sherwood family February 25, 2015 1:52 AM  

Two main points. Point 1: A wife consistently cooking delicious meals is a treasure whose worth cannot be overstated. That's what makes a house a home. The kitchen is the heart of any home and a wife who brings no skills in that area to a marriage and remains unwilling to acquire them, preferring to go to restaurants, etc. is an unnecessary redundancy. I can go get a pizza, I don't need a wife to tell me to do it. I can also cook reasonably well. What I cannot do is come home after a long/late day of work and put together a delicious meal for myself and my children consistently.

Fortunately, I married a wife who cooks very well. She budgets for groceries, buys them, balances nutrition/portions and consistently produces a great meal. She also, when there is time, cooks gourmet meals. These require a lot of effort and the results are on par with the finest restaurants. It is a passion for her, though one that time does not always allow her to indulge.

I am a diplomat so every two to three years we move and my wife has to reestablish a house, figure out what ingredients are available locally, where they are the cheapest, and learn a number of local recipes to add to her repetoire. Having a wife who is capable and willing to take on this task is a godsend. My single colleagues at the embassy either have to subsist on what they can make on the weekends, try to get household help (in many cases very expensive, depending on country) or eat at restaurants (also expensive and often a source of food poisoning, again, depending on country).

Point 2: Martha Stewart, for all her foibles (and they are many), has introduced many women to the notion of domesticity as a necessary and elegant occupation for a woman. My wife, when she fills out forms that ask for her profession always fills them in with "domestic goddess." That is an apt description for what a wife should be and how she should view her position. A wife should be the goddess of her sphere and rules under her husband's sovereignty. When I come home, my wife has things in place, dinner ready, children prepared for story time with me and then bed (unless I can get home for dinner, which is, unfortunately, not always the case.) and then we have time to ourselves.

Martha Stewart has raised the bar on domesticity. She has raised the sights of women from merely slopping food onto the table in front of a couple of screaming kids in a house that looks like a tornado passed through, to creating an elegant, orderly, and pleasant haven from the outside world. That vision used to be universal but feminism has eroded it or degraded it to the point that many do not know that it even exists. Martha Stewart should be thanked for her efforts in this regard.

Single men: that is what you are looking for if you choose to wed. I believe marriage and raising children to be a Christian duty but understand that opinions differ as do understandings of scripture. But if you do want to marry someone, make sure your wife will be a worthy consort, complimenting your efforts with her own, instead of competing with the children to see which of them will be the biggest brat.

Anonymous rho February 25, 2015 2:46 AM  

also... these folks saying that anyone and everyone can split wood... No. They can't.

Perhaps if you modify the statement it becomes true: "Anybody can split wood. There's about a 50/50 chance they'll lose a toe during their first 200 swings, and the odds slowly decrease after that but never reach zero. But luckily they'll be worn out by swing 37, and will probably decide that Smokey the Bear has a point and take up vegetarianism and quilting at the same time."

That may be a bit too wordy.

Who in the hell puts masa in their chili?!? Masa is for tamales.

Texans. It thickens the chili. There's like 1/4 cup of masa per gallon of chili, it barely counts as an ingredient.

Chili arguments are the best. Beans/no beans is the Kirk/Picard argument for chili. For real entertainment, find the guys who argue over whether grinding the beef is acceptable over finely dicing 5 lbs of beef shoulder. Ground/diced beef is the infield fly rule argument for chili.

Blogger Rantor February 25, 2015 2:57 AM  

Funny, this came up at work yesterday. Half the men share cooking duties, a few had wives that don't cook at all, no one asked me, they know... My wife cooks and bakes often sending first rate treats to the office. She also often asks what I want for dinner and then prepares it. When traveling if I run across something new or different, she'll figure out how to make it. When asked, I say her cooking was a third of the reason I married her.

Blogger arthur thurman February 25, 2015 3:39 AM  

Do you also comment on FN? If so, you're one of the sane voices on that blog.

Blogger arthur thurman February 25, 2015 3:40 AM  

Do you also comment on FN? If so, you're one of the sane voices on that blog.

Blogger Sherwood family February 25, 2015 3:59 AM  

I take firm stand on the chili argument: only deviants make meat slurry and call it chili. Beans are the sine qua non of chili.

Anonymous rho February 25, 2015 4:12 AM  

I take firm stand on the chili argument: only deviants make meat slurry and call it chili. Beans are the sine qua non of chili.

Pics or GTFO.

Blogger Sherwood family February 25, 2015 4:20 AM  

Picks of deviants or of chili beans?

Blogger Plump Pleasant Plumber February 25, 2015 4:24 AM  

Actual Texan here. Chili got started out as chopped meat, as fine as the cook could chop it. You see, the cattle back then were really tough. I was raised butchering our own livestock. Fresh meat is tough. It hasn't been aged in a cold locker for at least 28 days to tenderise it. As a practical matter, cooking chili in a Dutch oven nowadays is only similar to yesteryear, not the same. Chili grind beef does a good job of cutting up the connective tissue. Back then, corn meal was the staple, not corn flour. I make my own, btw. Yeah, some folks really like to make a big deal out of chili. That's cool. But if you really think about it, folks back then weren't so picky. Beans, no beans, are you kidding? They were hungry. I commented on Dalrock's thread, and I said that if a young woman can't cook, then the young man should take a pass. That she wasn't a nuturing type. You know them as feral feminists.

Blogger Sherwood family February 25, 2015 4:25 AM  

Here is the link: http://spiritweek.njit.edu/spiritweek/images/chiliCookoff.jpg

As you can see there is a criminal and the very devil herself in the picture. No doubt, attempting to foist meat slurry onto the unsuspecting who instead, have come for chili.


Anonymous rho February 25, 2015 4:38 AM  

Here is the link: http://spiritweek.njit.edu/spiritweek/images/chiliCookoff.jpg

It has all the hallmarks of good chili. Costumes? Check. Nothing to do with food? Check.

You are horrible, and everything you like is horrible. Go be horrible anywhere else.

Anonymous clk February 25, 2015 5:03 AM  

Fire, time and hard hard work .... just imagine how hard won each arce of farm land in the orginal 13 colonies was... all the stone walls you find in the deep woods of NE ? Each stone was hand carried and placed.... those were hard times I am sure rewarding too.

Blogger Sherwood family February 25, 2015 5:10 AM  

Hit it close to the mark, Rho? Come on...I'm not saying you can't eat your filthy meat slurry...I'm just saying that calling it chili degrades an otherwise decent meal. I can understand eating it that way if you were starving but to do so by choice? That's just sad.

Anonymous rho February 25, 2015 5:36 AM  

They are the cultural enemy. They have openly declared no quarter and asserted that there is no place in their society for those who don't submit to their vision of social justice. Rendering them unemployed, from within and without, and otherwise removing their microphones is a purely self-defensive, and above all, necessary tactic.

ARGLE BARGLE.

You can be irrelevant cheaper elsewhere.

Blogger Sherwood family February 25, 2015 5:51 AM  

Argle bargle is not one I was familiar with. I looked it up. Makes sense. Thanks for the new word.

OpenID cailcorishev February 25, 2015 8:40 AM  

also... these folks saying that anyone and everyone can split wood... No. They can't.

Yeah, he sounds like a good candidate for a cut foot or smashed ankle. Although I'd guess the more likely thing is that he'd be unable to lift my maul in the first place, so he'd thump at a few pieces with a light trimming axe for a few minutes, then whine that the snow was soaking through his loafers, and go inside so I could get some work done.

Blogger JaimeInTexas February 25, 2015 9:03 AM  

Love chili and enjoy the chili wars. Real chili dos not have beans and the meat may be cut small but it is not grounded.
Another war amuses me is the West Carolina versus East Carolina BBQ. They ain't ... Texas BBQ.

OpenID cailcorishev February 25, 2015 9:18 AM  

I may not be getting a representative sample, but people in my social circle all have giant kitchens with bazillion BTU top-of-the-line Viking ranges... which only get used a couple times a month.

That's what I was getting at. I know plenty of women who have kitchens that cost 100 times what their grandmothers had, who share lots of fancy recipes online, who drive an hour into the country to get strawberries from their Amish connection. But they don't cook more than a few times a week, if that. When they do, it's always a big deal, because they don't do it often enough to develop the habitual skills involved.

Blogger Leatherwing February 25, 2015 10:03 AM  

Real chili dos not have beans and the meat may be cut small but it is not grounded.

You can't trim the fat as well if you grind vs hand cutting the meat. Yes it's time consuming, but it makes a difference.

Another war amuses me is the West Carolina versus East Carolina BBQ. They ain't ... Texas BBQ.
Ain't that the truth. I live in NC, but moved here from TX. I can't stand that vinegary crap they call barbecue. There is one place in town that makes TX influenced BBQ. All the locals hate it, all the expats can't get enough.

Blogger Marissa February 25, 2015 11:12 AM  

Rule 4. That stuff they serve in Cincinnati is NOT chili.

Why, you....! :: shakes fist ::

Anonymous Sheila February 25, 2015 12:02 PM  

One issue I haven't seen anyone else address is who you are cooking for. I'm a fairly good cook, and I used to enjoy it. Both everyday stuff (roasted chicken or homemade spaghetti sauce) and fancy recipes (used to love giving dinner parties and trying out new recipes). The problem is, my husband doesn't like new recipes. He'll eat what I put in front of him, but if asked, will ALWAYS reply he likes the usual food or style better. He won't eat meatloaf or chili or any sort of casserole or anything from the slow cooker. When we first married, and I asked him his favorite dessert, he replied "pound cake." I tried various recipes but they just didn't please him; turns out what he meant was plain yellow cake from a box. The first time I made his favorite cookies (a type of shortbread) he complained they didn't taste the way his mother's did. Turned out she used Parkay and I used butter. I now make them half and half and he's content.

Anyhow, 25 years of meat and potatoes, same old same old, has pretty much destroyed my pleasure in cooking. I still get up and cook him breakfast (and everyone in my house starts the day with a bowl of freshly cut up fruit), and he usually has leftovers to take into work for lunch, but if I never have to fry another pork chop I'll be happy.

Blogger Markku February 25, 2015 12:26 PM  

What's this? Turns out you silly Americans call chili con carne just "chili", thereby discriminating against chili sin carne. I find this offensive and triggering. But all right, with that terminology, there is another mandatory ingredient too.

Blogger Shibes Meadow February 25, 2015 12:47 PM  

"Let there be you, let there be me,
Let there be oysters under the sea,
Let there be wind and occasional rain,
Chilli con carne and sparkling champagne"

No offense meant, but the first time they took me to a "chilli parlor" in Cincy I literally almost vomited. Baby diahhrrea served over egg noodles is what it looked like. And it had cinnamon in it. CINNAMON. I mean, why not paint haloes on the dogs playing poker and call it The Last Supper? If people up there like to eat that swill, fine, but can't they use another name for it besides chili? It's like serving SPAM on a roofing tile and calling it prosciutto.

On the other hand, the pork ribs I had at the Montogomery Inn were memorable. They are not Barbecue As We Know It, but they were Cinci-licious.

Anonymous clk February 25, 2015 1:09 PM  

"Anybody can split wood. There's about a 50/50 chance they'll lose a toe during their first 200 swings, and the odds slowly decrease after that but never reach zero."....

Processing tree's into fire wood is a very dangerous job .. even the experts will tell you this. having cut wood my entire life for wood heat I will tell you are always one bonehead move/loss of attention for a bad day .. thats why I use the chainsaw chaps and boots last 10 years .. too many near "oh shit.." moments. Although there are worse ways of dying than bleeding to death in the woods surrounded by tree's.... I will choose that over in a nursing home anyday.

"... unable to lift my maul in the first place....so he'd thump at a few pieces with a light trimming axe for a few minutes" ... the days of the moster heavy maul are numbered ... try one of these new fancy fiskars splitting axes .. you will put the 8 pound maul back in the shed...

The pot pie, chilli, soup, stews .. these are are great meals that interestingly have progressed from their earliest incarnations as food for the poor, as ways of turning poor cuts of meat, scraps, carcuss etc into food and to feed more with less in a now gourmet fare... its all very intresting stuff..

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