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Sunday, September 20, 2015

I may have to reconsider women's sports

Sure, they don't grasp either sportsmanship or emotional continence, but that doesn't mean they don't offer considerable entertainment in their own right:
By the side of the green, Hull could clearly be seen walking towards the next tee in a gesture that golfers the world over will recognize as the tacit concession of a tiny putt. Lee duly scooped her ball up, only to be met by Pettersen’s fiery insistence that no such concession had been made. ‘Europe one up,’ declared the referee, who had no choice but to apply the dictum: rules are rules.

Cue pandemonium. Down the 18th hole the European coterie of captains and assistant captains debated what had happened. Surely one of them could see it drove a coach and horses through the idea that the spirit of the game is a vital part of the integrity of these matches?

Under the rules they had the opportunity to offer a concession of the final hole and make things right. It cried out for strong leadership – or just common sporting decency, for that matter – but sadly none was forthcoming from the captain, Carin Koch.

It says everything about the grotesqueness of it all that Hull had taken her record to four wins out of four – and yet still ended the match in floods of tears.
Awesome. Frankly, I think women's sports would be a lot more popular if they stopped trying to imitate the men and just embraced the full extent of cattiness and head games that women are capable of bringing to intra-sexual relations.

This will serve as your NFL open thread.

Labels:

81 Comments:

Blogger Iowahine September 20, 2015 12:05 PM  

Looking for it to end in hair-pulling and jello wrestling? Reality usually involves dykes, sluts, and land-whales. Bring on reality.

Blogger Steve September 20, 2015 12:26 PM  

I don't normally like female golfers, due to their off-putting sideburns and general lezzieness, but...

Would comfort, then get a hole in one.

Blogger Just Mark September 20, 2015 12:29 PM  

@ Gavin Veil

Panthers over Houston Panthers D will win it.

Pittsburgh over San Fran 10 days vs 6 days rest and at home.

New Orleans over Tampa Bay QB rookie blues vs a quite competent Saints team at home.

Vikings over Detroit but only because they are at home this might be a case of a resistable force meeting a moveable object. If that happens then it will be a Calvin Johnson day. This game is really a coin flip but I'm listening to my heart over my head.

Cardinals over Chicago Excellence over mediocrity

New England over Buffalo with trepidation

Cincinnati over San Diego. I think the Bengals will run all over the Chargers and control the tempo.

Tennessee over Cleveland. I just don't believe in Johnny

Atlanta over New York. Giants offense is meh, Giants defense is meh. Maybe the Giants score 20 but Atlanta will score more.

St. Louis over Washington. Washington is New York only worse. Washington may score 16 or 17 and that ain't enough.

Miami over Jacksonville. Jacksonville looks beat up. I think Miami takes this one by 7 to 10 points ... maybe more

Baltimore over Oakland. The Raiders will continue to live up to their reputation of suck.

Philadelphia over Dallas. I like Philly at home in a shoot out.

Green Bay over Seattle. Another pick with trepidation. If Marshawn Lynch controls the game and/or Seattle gets a pick or two ... on the other hand if Rodgers cuts up the Seattle secondary and they are at home ... flip a coin.

Colts over the Jets. They are at home on a Monday night and they ain't the Browns nor are the Jets the Bills.

Lost track of time with work last week so didn't get a pick in for Denver vs. KC. Mia Culpa

Blogger Dave September 20, 2015 12:32 PM  

– and yet still ended the match in floods of tears.

Somebody has to say it: There's no crying in the LPGA Ladies European Tour Solhiem Cup.

E-A-G-L-E-S Go Birds

OpenID b1bae96e-6447-11e3-b6bb-000f20980440 September 20, 2015 12:34 PM  

So I read this article and realized how completely alien golf is to me. Must be some sort of different scoring.

I wouldn't think you could give anybody a putt. It might not affect your head to head but aren't there 50 other people vying for position with thousands of dollars on the line?

---

SNF. Something tells me Rodgers is going to humiliate the Seahawks.

Bruce Arians is going to go for the jugular to just rub the McCaskey's noses in not selecting him.

Blogger Giuseppe September 20, 2015 12:44 PM  

Shiesh! I knew Vox was a bloodthirsty leader of a pack of rabid faceless minions...but I didn't know his viciousness extended all the way to female sports! Truly cruel.

Blogger haus frau September 20, 2015 12:54 PM  

"Frankly, I think women's sports would be a lot more popular if they stopped trying to imitate the men and just embraced the full extent of cattiness and head games that women are capable of bringing to intra-sexual relations."

Pedopunter approves this message. I expect him to don a dress and take up golfing any day now.

Blogger toadbile September 20, 2015 1:02 PM  

Having never watch women golfing
I thought it looked like this: http://tiny.cc/v5qm3x
and now awful reality has ruined it for me.

Blogger Stickwick Stapers September 20, 2015 1:07 PM  

The infighting, head games, and lack of sportsmanship is why I gave up very early on girls team sports and went for solo sports like powerlifting.

I have actually seen women sabotage a win for the whole team just to get back at a teammate. That's exceedingly rare in male sports. It's admirable the way male athletes are able to band together and work toward a common goal when some of the teammates don't like each other -- and even hate each other -- which would be impossible for a women's team. And the way they put the integrity of the game ahead of their own egos or feelings or whatever -- very difficult for women.

Blogger Student in Blue September 20, 2015 1:07 PM  

Iowahine, are you talking about something like this?

Blogger Eric September 20, 2015 1:07 PM  

That was entertaining.

Blogger Dave September 20, 2015 1:15 PM  

Stevil? Is that you? No burnt retinas?

Blogger James Dixon September 20, 2015 1:22 PM  

> I expect him to don a dress and take up golfing any day now.

Which raises the question of when Jenner is going to demand to be allowed in the LPGA.

Blogger bob k. mando September 20, 2015 1:26 PM  

Vox
This will serve as your NFL open thread.



oh, snap.

i think Vox just said he's in favor of female place kickers.

Blogger YIH September 20, 2015 1:29 PM  

From what little golf I've played, not only is there not such a thing as a 'concessionary' putt, the length does not look like it would be.
From the photos, it appears to be about 15 inches = 0.381 meters. Not a 'tap in' (<2in/3cm).
In football, it's the equivalent of a 30 FG.
She used the rules, nothing wrong with that.
BTW, from everything I'd heard and read, I thought the Vikes were a team on the rise and the Niners were a team on the decline. That's not what the score indicated.
That hurt, it was out of the division. That's where the Vikes need wins because like the Niners they are in a tough division.

Blogger Markku September 20, 2015 1:32 PM  

She used the rules, nothing wrong with that.

It was not the length, it was the gesture. This is the same as saying "Ok, I admit it, you w*cough*", then the other picking up her ball, and then she claiming she was actually calling her a wimp. And therefore be declared the winner since the other picked up her ball.

Blogger James Sullivan September 20, 2015 1:33 PM  

I know jack squat regarding golf.

That whole thing read "blah blah blah catty yadda yadda yadda and other catty bitch cries blah blah blah..."

Blogger Markku September 20, 2015 1:37 PM  

This is why there are the principles of sportsmanlike behavior. So that you don't always have to go through "ok, so let's be very clear, you concede the round? You are absolutely sure? I'd like that in writing, sign here, here, here and here.

And here.

Blogger Danby September 20, 2015 1:39 PM  

I have actually seen women sabotage a win for the whole team just to get back at a teammate. That's exceedingly rare in male sports

That's because a man or boy who did such a thing would be 1)immediately thrown off the team and 2)savagely beaten

Blogger YIH September 20, 2015 1:42 PM  

@16 Marrku:
I disagree, that's not 'an automatic', it's far enough to miss. She taps, just slightly off-center, it 'rims' the cup and does not go in.
In NFL 'extra points' every now and then the 'automatic' PAT does fail.
She had every right (as would a male golfer) to say, 'nope, you have to sink it, sorry'.

Blogger automatthew September 20, 2015 1:46 PM  

Pettersen looks like a man.

Blogger automatthew September 20, 2015 1:46 PM  

YIH, can you even read?

Blogger automatthew September 20, 2015 1:49 PM  

Markku said, quite clearly, that the problem was that the Euro team made a physical gesture -- walking away from the green -- that indicated they were accepting the putt.

It has nothing to do with whether the putt was a gimme.

Blogger Cataline Sergius September 20, 2015 1:56 PM  

There was an Irish Music in Muskegon Michigan this weekend.

And while it's not particularly Irish they always conduct a Highland Games tournament.

This year for whatever damn reason they decided to let women participate. It was more pathetic than actually amusing. None of them of course could even lift the caber let alone toss the freaking thing.

My wife kept asking, what was the point.

I told her it was symbolic of their struggle against reality.

Blogger YIH September 20, 2015 1:59 PM  

@22 automatthew:
Point taken. She should not have whined about it, she should have put the ball back down and attempted the 'easy' putt.
BTW Vox, looks like Monday night lit a fire under the Vikes ass. I hope so.

Blogger luagha September 20, 2015 2:15 PM  

Was watching American Ninja Warrior recently. While the women who make it as far as they do to get on the final show are truly incredible, the difference in explosive speed between them and even the last male competitor is so gross it can't be denied. And of course the relentless upper body portions are impossible so the women qualify with good partial times on the initial qualifying course, then face a first course of three that has less upper body.

Blogger Feather Blade September 20, 2015 2:16 PM  

And while it's not particularly Irish they always conduct a Highland Games tournament.

This year for whatever damn reason they decided to let women participate.


There have always been women's events at highland games. How else could you determine who can throw an iron skillet the farthest?

Blogger JACIII September 20, 2015 2:20 PM  

Women's golf will end up doing away with that particular principle. If university women can't be trusted to consent to sex without a signature there is no way this won't come up again.

Blogger haus frau September 20, 2015 2:23 PM  

That's because a man or boy who did such a thing would be 1)immediately thrown off the team and 2)savagely beaten

There's a lot to be said for the reformation power of a good beating. Some people just don't grasp abstract concepts well.

Blogger bob k. mando September 20, 2015 2:25 PM  

25. YIH September 20, 2015 1:59 PM
She should not have whined about it, she should have put the ball back down and attempted the 'easy' putt.



that's illegal.

the technical rule is, you're not allowed to touch or move the ball EXCEPT as an attempted stroke to put the ball in the hole.

by turning and walking from the green, the Euros were conceding the stroke as successful. this is convention, not truly in the rule book.

this would be like a 3rd baseman telling a baserunner he could tie his shoes ... and then tagging him out when he took his foot off the bag.

technically legal? certainly.

still a douchebag move.




21. automatthew September 20, 2015 1:46 PM
Pettersen looks like a man.



dude, do NOT even go there.

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2015/09/20/13/2C83FCB200000578-3241906-America_captain_Juli_Inkster_pictured_on_Saturday_said_Europe_ha-a-26_1442753828296.jpg

Blogger pbuxton September 20, 2015 2:35 PM  

This article is so badly written I have no idea what Petterson or Hull or Lee's first names are or who they played for. What shaved monkeys wrote and then passed this article? Pathetic.

Blogger Cail Corishev September 20, 2015 2:44 PM  

From what little golf I've played, not only is there not such a thing as a 'concessionary' putt

There's not in standard play where your score counts against the field, but there is in match play, which it sounds like this was. In match play, each hole is scored separately, just you against the player you're matched up against, so concessions on short putts are common.

I totally suck at golf, but I did play a lot one year and learned the rules. Even I consider 18" a gimme, and a sportsman would have conceded it after realizing his action made the other player think he conceded, even if he didn't intend to. If you're tied on the 17th hole and you want to make your opponent sink every putt no matter how short, you damn sure make that clear.

Interestingly, in real (men's) golf, some of the best young players are bringing class and sportsmanship back to the game, after the last couple decades of golfers being known more for things like drinking problems and ugly divorces. But the guys bringing it back are very white (Day is Australian/Filipino), so I don't know whether they're getting much attention outside golf broadcasts.

OpenID malcolmthecynic September 20, 2015 2:55 PM  

Think of golf more like chess. In chess matches between truly great players if it is clear that one side has the game in the bag it is considered good sportsmanship to concede the match (if for nothing else than that it shortens things and makes things more convenient for the other players).

Golf isn't a normal sport, and different ideas of sportsmanship are in play.

Blogger Cail Corishev September 20, 2015 2:57 PM  

Must be some sort of different scoring.

Match play.

Blogger Markku September 20, 2015 2:57 PM  

that's illegal.

Exactly. The Euro team became the winner when she picked up the ball, but only by stunning dishonesty.

Blogger Eric Wilson September 20, 2015 3:11 PM  

I AM a golfer, and this is absolutely hideous. YIH, a 15" putt will be missed by the sum total of all PGA golfers on tour in all tournaments something like 5-10 times per year. It is far, far more automatic than even the old NFL PAT from the 2 yard line. I'd say an order of magnitude better. Even among the women. There are a number of golfers who won't miss a putt under 36" all year long.

That said, Vox is right. The pictures in the article were hilarious.

Blogger Dave September 20, 2015 3:15 PM  

Uh back to a real sport; lots of teams appear to have shot their wads last week. SF, Tennessee, Atlanta, Buffalo

OpenID Jack Amok September 20, 2015 3:19 PM  

There's a lot to be said for the reformation power of a good beating. Some people just don't grasp abstract concepts well.

Another aspect of the realization that not all violence is uncivilized.

Blogger Daniel September 20, 2015 3:51 PM  

Today is proof that midnight monday west coast openers are not designed with the actual game in mind.

Blogger roundeye September 20, 2015 4:05 PM  

And that is done all the time. It is part of the game. What the euros did was walk off the green, which is universally known as conceding the putt (it is very bad form to go to the next tee without your competitors).

Blogger roundeye September 20, 2015 4:08 PM  

This will never happen again. She has ruined her reputation.

Blogger Wayne September 20, 2015 4:36 PM  

Saints make a great case today for being the worst team in the NFL.

Blogger rcocean September 20, 2015 5:02 PM  

18 inches is a clearly a 'gimme' although I've never experienced the "walking to the next green means you've conceded" - IRC in two famous instances in the Ryder Cup both Nicklaus and Langer Verbally told the other player they were conceding the putt. In the case of Nicklaus, Sam Snead the captain complained about Jack's sportsmanship, thereby confirming the Snead was 1/4 asshole.

Blogger Guitar Man September 20, 2015 5:03 PM  

Ugly 4th, but the Pats got the W.

Blogger rcocean September 20, 2015 5:07 PM  

Yes, women are a little weak on sportsmanship and team play but then it ties in with the female emphasis on relationhships. When thrown into close contact, Women usually become very, very good friends, tighter than any male friends. or they go to the extreme and really really dislike each other. They're not very good at putting their feelings aside and tolerating each other for the "good of the team".

Blogger Eric Wilson September 20, 2015 5:15 PM  

Women usually become very, very good friends, tighter than any male friends. or they go to the extreme and really really dislike each other.

And often vacillate between the two with incredible rapidity.

Blogger HardReturn¶ September 20, 2015 5:21 PM  

A sport where women would occasionally weep, wail, and sob as an occasional acceptable tactical distraction to the game (like fighting in hockey) might lure in prospective pink ESPN audience. With lots of back story accompanied by soft piano music. Never mind, that's the Olympics…

I was just about sure the Bucs would squander their lead and end up losing. Still unsure how Jameis is making transition to NFL.

Blogger bob k. mando September 20, 2015 5:34 PM  

45. rcocean September 20, 2015 5:07 PM
They're not very good at putting their feelings aside...



you do realize that this is a complete sentence, yes?

Blogger SciVo September 20, 2015 5:58 PM  

@ Eric Wilson: And often vacillate between the two with incredible rapidity.

I've been told that female conversations have at least three levels, so they could presumably do both concurrently. Naturally, they invented the frenemy.

Blogger Hammerli280 September 20, 2015 6:12 PM  

Figure skating. Cute girls, great legs. Or rythmic gymnastics.

Blogger Steve September 20, 2015 6:21 PM  

Dave - I'm not so far gone in my Stevilness that I'd subject the good people of VP to your average woman golfer. They mostly look like Colin Montgomerie.

That little Chinese cookie is a rarity in the world of ladies golf. She's probably the only one on the tour who doesn't have to shave every day.

Blogger Eric Wilson September 20, 2015 6:27 PM  

@ SciVo

Yes, this is probably true too. I'm pretty sure that's why Mean Girls was such a successful movie.

Blogger SirThermite (VFM #0025) September 20, 2015 7:02 PM  

You'd think an American woman would know that "Only Yes Means Yes" /s

Blogger Harsh September 20, 2015 7:42 PM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger Harsh September 20, 2015 7:49 PM  

That little Chinese cookie is a rarity in the world of ladies golf.

If it's the Chinese cookie I'm thinking of, she's little nothing. Six foot one or so.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

OpenID b1bae96e-6447-11e3-b6bb-000f20980440 September 20, 2015 7:55 PM  

Skins, Browns, Jags, Bucs, Raiders all win.... that parlay would have had to been worth billions.

WillBest

Blogger ray September 20, 2015 8:54 PM  

In match play, if walk turn away and walk off while your opponent has a short one left, it's considered good. I've even seen players stay and jab at the putt, miss it, then have the crowd gasp. The opponent just glanced over his shoulder and shrugged. Being an actual man (as opposed to the hordes of modern males) everyone understood the politesse, and his honor as a man was more important than winning one hole in a mere competition. Albeit a City Championship competition.

Women don't do it that way, because women don't have certain intangible elements 'breathed' into them by God. Including honor and thirst for justice. It is folly and disaster for any nation to assume the intellectual, spiritutal, or moral/ethical equivalence between male and female. It doesn't exist except in the minds of the matriarchate -- women, girls, the parents of daughters, and the vast array of vampires who feed off making females 'equal' to males.

Point of story: females are not equal to males; females do not carry the basic Service Assumptions ingrained in males, and fairness to females is whatever Gets Them Their Way. Which of course you're heroic politicians are a zillion miles from confronting, much less communicating. So y'all tell yourselves that all that matters is Stopping Immigration! lol

This message was wholly funded and forced upon you by The Evil Joos. Because They are everywhere.

Blogger Conan the Cimmerian September 20, 2015 8:57 PM  

Dez goes down, Romo the Homo goes down...

F the start of this season.

And F the F'in Eagles.

Blogger Conan the Cimmerian September 20, 2015 8:58 PM  

Worst 2 and 0 start ever. (two NFC East wins at that).

Brandon Weedon sucks a weedon.

Blogger Conan the Cimmerian September 20, 2015 8:59 PM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger Conan the Cimmerian September 20, 2015 9:02 PM  

And, let it be clear, if you posted on this thread about golf (and not the NFL, this the NFL open thread that this is), then yes, you are gay.

Blogger Harsh September 20, 2015 9:11 PM  

And, let it be clear, if you posted on this thread about golf (and not the NFL, this the NFL open thread that this is), then yes, you are gay.

Dammit!

Blogger Conan the Cimmerian September 20, 2015 9:15 PM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger Conan the Cimmerian September 20, 2015 9:16 PM  

Harsh,

You were making comments about a chick and her looks. That has an exception just as guns have an exception.

Officially recognised as not gay.

OpenID Jack Amok September 20, 2015 9:19 PM  

I'm still winning in FF even though by QB and both RBs went out with injuries.

Wow, GB used all their timeouts in the 1st Quarter?

Hands to the Face is one of the dumbest penalties in the NFL.

Michael Bennet back to the locker room? Just getting an early jump on halftime...

Blogger Anonymous September 20, 2015 9:46 PM  

Coming soon: The golf slap.

- Koanic

Blogger Cail Corishev September 20, 2015 10:31 PM  

I watch more football than golf; but just for fun, a multiple choice quiz, answer either NFL or PGA:

Which celebrates Pinktober, encouraging its players to wear fabulous pink accessories?

Which continues to blackball a talented player because he punched his fiancee (who married him six weeks later and defended him against critics) in the middle of a fight where they were both drunk and hitting each other, while happily giving second chances to felons of various other kinds?

Which has its stars participate in an offensive, treacly "No More" campaign that implies that if you haven't turned a man in for domestic violence lately, you're part of the problem, and probably an abuser yourself?

Which shoehorns women into coaching and refereeing positions as blatant publicity stunts?

And the bonus question: Which nickname is for real: Sparklepunter or Sparkleputter?

Blogger Daniel September 20, 2015 10:33 PM  

Weedon will get you where you want to go if where you want to go is home for the holidays.

49ers ought to change their name to Andrew. They crazy. St. Louis beat seattle last week. Seattle's head is not right.

Blogger bob k. mando September 21, 2015 12:16 AM  

61. Conan the Cimmerian September 20, 2015 9:02 PM
And, let it be clear, if you posted on this thread about golf (and not the NFL, this the NFL open thread that this is), then yes, you are gay.



auto racing is the only major sport that requires two balls to play.

Blogger Markku September 21, 2015 12:23 AM  

Beer pong.

I WIN!

Blogger LP999/S.I.G. September 21, 2015 2:35 AM  

Cool.

The lack of football triggers me! Fall is that stabilizing force meaning The Lord, dad, football and Fall weather are wonderful!

Of course I do not comment on football/soccer, its for the men but I enjoy the threads.

Why can't we have women's sports like pretty sports like dainty ballet (non-modern) or yoga or what gymnastics used to be 25 years ago.

Here's to football. if the lady is gifted for golf, great, just let the men play in peace.

Blogger The Overgrown Hobbit September 21, 2015 4:01 AM  

Sure, they don't grasp either sportsmanship or emotional continence

Two words: deflated balls.

Female athletes do sportsmanship just fine. The problem with female sports is for the spectators. Sure they're fun an exciting for the gals who play them but compared to men's sports they're just boring. Kind of like soccer

Blogger James Dixon September 21, 2015 4:07 AM  

> The lack of football triggers me! Fall is that stabilizing force meaning The Lord, dad, football and Fall weather are wonderful!

For your enjoyment then: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPLmxtiVOe0

From back when the Raiders were a team to reckon with.

Blogger Harsh September 21, 2015 10:19 AM  

One dubious example doesn't disprove male sportsmanship. The tendencies are what matter.

Blogger bob k. mando September 21, 2015 1:47 PM  

70. Markku September 21, 2015 12:23 AM
Beer pong.
I WIN!



poor Markku.

sports which require a multitude of balls are just ... gay.

Blogger ray September 21, 2015 2:10 PM  

Conan - "And, let it be clear, if you posted on this thread about golf (and not the NFL, this the NFL open thread that this is), then yes, you are gay."



Great! Go ahead and put on your Porkrind Conehead and your garters, and assume the position. No kneepads for Mouthy!

Blogger ray September 21, 2015 2:12 PM  

@67 -- Indeed. But Macho Man Conie is already greased up. Oh my what shall we do?

Blogger Carl Philipp September 21, 2015 5:09 PM  

@75 "poor Markku.

sports which require a multitude of balls are just ... gay."

Counterexample: Muggle Quidditch. Wikipedia says it's an internationally played mixed-gender contact sport, and that doesn't sound at all like a try-hard rationalization.

OpenID Jack Amok September 22, 2015 2:07 AM  

For your enjoyment then: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPLmxtiVOe0

From back when the Raiders were a team to reckon with.


The Raiders may have been on an extended voyage of ineptitude lately, but no other franchise can boast inspiring a better poem.

Maybe they're just a franchise meant for a time when the NFL wasn't quite so wimpy.

Blogger Mark In Mayenne September 22, 2015 3:57 AM  

There is something in that

Blogger Dirk Manly September 23, 2015 12:23 PM  

Beer pong is gay.

Real men play quarters.

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