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Saturday, July 22, 2017

To scalzi or not to scalzi

It's all so confusing. Of course, the confusion is further complicated by the fact that the real John Scalzi is a fraud.


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41 Comments:

Blogger Benjamin Kraft July 22, 2017 8:46 AM  

Isn't it the same thing either way? After all, even if you're Scalzi you're not "Scalzi".

Blogger JACIII July 22, 2017 8:47 AM  

Such great times to be alive:

Good Morning. Good coffee. Sun's out. Birds singing. Somebody is f**king with Scalzi.

It's gonna be a great day!

Anonymous Anonymous July 22, 2017 9:01 AM  

LOL

Sorry to be completely off topic, but i really need to let you know something.

Vox. You may have heard in the medias of the country you are living in, that a police officer posted on social media a video of him escorting a vibrant individual that thought it was safe to ride a bicicle on the motorway.

For the above video, the italian police officer has been suspended. For the reason that he criticised the President of the house of representatives, Laura Boldrini, who has a great part in importing such vibrant resources into the country.

I do not need to mention that the police officer did nothing wrong apart from expressing his opinions. He saved the life of the stupid cyclist, and did not even fine him.

Wouldn't it be great if somebody who knows how to do it ( i don't ), would spread the rumour that the President of the italian house of representatives, Laura Boldrini, is under investigation by the Internation Court on the account of human traficking?

...which by the way, she is really doing.

Thanks, bye.

Anonymous BBGKB July 22, 2017 9:04 AM  

Good Morning. Good coffee. Sun's out. Birds singing. Somebody is f**king with Scalzi

I just posted the "Everyone has AIDS" video under a Everyone has A's everyone a valedictorian post and see a new Scalzi article.

Anonymous 5343 Kinds of Deplorable July 22, 2017 9:09 AM  

This continues to be the single most consistently entertaining year of my entire life. And the Pats won the Superbowl too, Nate.

Gonna have to change my online name to 5343 Bowls of Cherries.

Blogger Didact July 22, 2017 9:11 AM  

There are days when I wonder whether we of the alt-Right will ever stop WINNING!!!- and then I see things like this which make me fall off my chair laughing, and I realise that we will never get tired of winning. Not EVER.

It is truly a great day to be alive.

Blogger Cataline Sergius July 22, 2017 9:26 AM  

How is Scalzi NOT a member of the Blue Check Mark mafia?

Anonymous Goldberg Wrangler July 22, 2017 9:28 AM  

One of his relatives messaged me thinking I was him

http://i.imgur.com/jrygEPB.png

http://i.imgur.com/mWAyDJc.png

Blogger Benjamin Kraft July 22, 2017 9:36 AM  

@8. And yet, all of what you said is so true! Even the real(?) Scalzi must hate kids (little boys because he writes crap sci-fi, and little girls because he writes women as "heroes" in crap sci-fi).

Anonymous Goldberg Wrangler July 22, 2017 9:41 AM  

I haven't read any Scalzi books but I'd hazard a guess that his female heroes are basically "men with tits", nerd fantasies that reflect a crippled understanding of actual femininity, as you see in so many new superhero movies.

Anonymous basementhomebrewer July 22, 2017 9:41 AM  

Goldberg Wrangler wrote:One of his relatives messaged me thinking I was him



Vox needs to put this as an update to the OP. The dialogue is hilarious.

Blogger VD July 22, 2017 9:44 AM  

I haven't read any Scalzi books but I'd hazard a guess that his female heroes are basically "men with tits", nerd fantasies that reflect a crippled understanding of actual femininity, as you see in so many new superhero movies.

You guessed correct. And his male heroes are vulgar atheists who really respect women and know the Bible better than any Bible-thumping Christian, believe it or not.

Blogger Lucas July 22, 2017 9:45 AM  

LOL

Blogger ZhukovG July 22, 2017 9:47 AM  

If Scalzi had actually posted the above picture, I would have been forced, however reluctantly, to improve my opinion of him.

Anonymous Man of the Atom July 22, 2017 9:49 AM  

Didact wrote:There are days when I wonder whether we of the alt-Right will ever stop WINNING!!!- and then I see things like this which make me fall off my chair laughing, and I realise that we will never get tired of winning. Not EVER.

It is truly a great day to be alive.


The Winning has become akin to Bacon. Never can have enough.

Blogger Dirtnapninja July 22, 2017 10:10 AM  

Ahahahaha!

I love the alt-right.

Blogger Student in Blue July 22, 2017 10:20 AM  

Well McCain accomplished the Cuckservative dream: he has a liberal saying nice things about him.

Blogger Nakota Publishing July 22, 2017 10:35 AM  

Whew, for a moment I thought the post was real and I'd have to start liking Scalzi.

Blogger Dave July 22, 2017 11:01 AM  

I'd have thought McRapey would be busy trying to rig the Dragon Awards nominations instead of paying attention to a fake twitter impersonator?

Two days left before the second annual Dragon Awards Nominations are closed: deadline July 24, 2017

http://application.dragoncon.org/dc_fan_awards_nominations.php

Blogger Cataline Sergius July 22, 2017 11:01 AM  

@10

This is not a parody, this is actual Scalzi's actual writing.

Chapter Two

Kiva Lagos was busily fucking the brains out of the assistant purser she’d been after for the last six weeks of the Yes, Sir, That’s My Baby’s trip from Lankaran to End when Second Officer Waylov Brennir entered her stateroom, unannounced. “You’re needed,” he said.

“I’m a little busy at the moment,” Kiva said. She’d just finally gotten herself into a groove, so fuck Waylov (not literally, he was awful) if she was going to get out of the groove just because he walked into it. Grooves were hard to come by. People have sex, and he was unannounced. If this was what he walked into, it was his fault, not hers. The assistant purser seemed a little concerned, but Kiva applied a little pressure to make it clear festivities were to continue.


Tor paid him three million for this.

Blogger Nick S July 22, 2017 11:09 AM  

John: 3:16 pm, "The Swamp shall be drained. Thus sayeth the Lord."

Blogger Jack July 22, 2017 11:19 AM  

@20

PEOPLE HAVE SEX, BIGOT. IT IS JUST LIKE THAT IN THOSE 30 REDTUBE VIDEOS I WATCHED LAST NIGHT

Holy fuck what a retarded nerd faggot

Blogger Natalie July 22, 2017 11:30 AM  

I read "Old Men's War" and mildly enjoyed it but had no desire to read any more of his books. Then I learned more about Scalzi and appreciated OMW so much more - because it's incredibly revealing. It's a guide to gamma delusions and rather amusing in that guise.

OT: A Man Disrupted was great! Vox is typically too grim and bloody for my feminine sensibilities, but I would read more of Tower's investigations anyway. It reminded me of Tom Swift and King Solomon's Mines and the other boy lit I've read that can still appeal to women.

Anonymous Gen. Kong July 22, 2017 11:39 AM  

Judeo-Christ herself is not amused, but Kek laughs thunderously.

Blogger Ransom Smith July 22, 2017 11:45 AM  

@20 What the ever loving *Curses in Southerner* did I just read?
That's so....wow. I'm stunned.

I always knew he was a low-T manlet but that? That's just revolting.

Blogger Aeoli Pera July 22, 2017 12:01 PM  

Lol.

Blogger S1AL July 22, 2017 12:39 PM  

I didn't know it was possible to write a sex scene that was neither titillating nor humorous, yet too insipid to be disturbing. Now I do.

Blogger Duke Norfolk July 22, 2017 12:43 PM  

LOL, you just gotta love some of the trolling that's done these days. And the fact that so many people are still so clueless about it all.

Blogger Rosabie July 22, 2017 1:48 PM  

basementhomebrewer wrote:Vox needs to put this as an update to the OP. The dialogue is hilarious.
"If it's one of my books, he should throw it out. most of my books are just subliminal pro-homosexual messaging."

Blogger exfarmkid July 22, 2017 2:46 PM  

Cataline Sergius This is not a parody, this is actual Scalzi's actual writing.

You cannot possibly be serious.

Anonymous Mike Rock July 22, 2017 2:54 PM  

Exfarmkid....... from a current farm oldster.....
Damn, I cut and pasted that to, I hate to say it, google, and sho nuf..... a whole page of it. It's Scalzi all right...
How horrible.

Anonymous Man of the Atom July 22, 2017 2:54 PM  

exfarmkid wrote:Cataline Sergius This is not a parody, this is actual Scalzi's actual writing.

You cannot possibly be serious.


Serious Cat(aline) is serious.

Blogger exfarmkid July 22, 2017 2:58 PM  

WHY THE HELL DID I JUST LOOK???

Cataline Sergius, I apologize and abase myself with dust and ashes.....

Blogger Cail Corishev July 22, 2017 3:08 PM  

Not only is it real, but it's an excerpt his publisher chose to promote his new book. Someone was reading through the chapters he'd submitted so far, came across that passage, and said, "This, this right here. This is what will get the pre-orders rolling in!" And no one else realized (or could say out loud) how awful and off-putting it is.

But then, maybe his fans will love it. Maybe they'll cheer and say "You go girl, use that subordinate sexually. Take that, patriarcy!"

Anonymous SigOther July 22, 2017 3:48 PM  

That is clearly not the same Scalzi. I mean, look at the hair; the complainy one clearly has more hair in his accurate, undoctored picture than the other more bald one.

Blogger Kristophr July 22, 2017 4:18 PM  

I suggest frogging your own Scalzi accounts.

My Scalzi troll account is fight!

Blogger dc.sunsets July 22, 2017 5:59 PM  

Tor paid him three million for this.

Money for nothing but he missed the second part entirely.

Blogger Raging Papist July 22, 2017 6:07 PM  

I see two Scalzis too many.

Blogger S1AL July 22, 2017 8:00 PM  

I read more of the excerpt. I can write better dialogue than that in my sleep. Apparently I'm in the wrong business.

Blogger Snidely Whiplash July 22, 2017 10:38 PM  

S1AL wrote:Apparently I'm in the wrong business.
So you thing Science Fiction writing is about things like engaging characters, witty, or at least human, dialogue, and clever world building?
Scalzi's career shows us it's about writing to a checklist, inerting SJW tropes instead of characters, maintaining the proper opinions IRL, and hating the right people.
Readable dialogue and interesting characters don't even enter into it.

Anonymous VFM #6306 July 24, 2017 12:14 AM  

There is a very good reason why the underdog Corrosion killed Collapsing Emperox Mangina Sex by McRapey.

It was simply a better book.

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