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Wednesday, February 20, 2019

Jumping the narrative

Nothing like getting your story written three weeks early.
Though it won’t hit theaters for another three weeks, Captain Marvel is already being review bombed on Rotten Tomatoes. These reviews aren’t from critics or journalists, but from angry impotent men flooding the audience reviews with their anger. What are they angry about? So many things!

Men are shouting from basements all across the land about Brie Larson, her feminism and liberal politics, how Captain Marvel is an SJW film, and ARG WOMEN I HATE THEM WHY WON’T THEY LOVE ME!? Sidebar: I still don’t get how “social justice warrior” is an insult? Like, those are all good qualities and it’s basically a superhero name. If anyone needs someone to write a Social Justice Warrior origin story, call me.

The point of this kind of review bombing campaign is to drag down the average audience rating to discourage folks from seeing the film. In some instances it works, like with 2016’s Ghostbusters, which suffered from massive downvoting of the trailer on YouTube, as well as a rush of one star IMDb reviews. The film even added a scene featuring the Ghostbusters reading nasty internet comments about themselves in a moment of meta-awareness.
The viciousness of this review bombing campaign is particularly noteworthy given that the bomb-to-be isn't even reviewable on Rotten Tomatoes yet.

CAPTAIN MARVEL 2019

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118 Comments:

Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother February 20, 2019 3:27 PM  

Limited hangout: SJW Edition

Blogger Dave Dave February 20, 2019 3:30 PM  

Actual women don't want to watch Captain Marvel. Women are very rarely interested in action movies, and even more rarely interested in superhero movies. Women are not the target audience. Why, then, would Marvel expect to get a positive reaction when they alienate their target audience of young men? Obviously, Marvel doesn't care about money and just wants to kill entertainment.

Blogger Noah B The Savage Gardener February 20, 2019 3:30 PM  

Does she have other facial expressions or is bitchface all she's got?

Blogger Crew February 20, 2019 3:30 PM  

Hmmm, there do seem to be "reviews" or something:

https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/captain_marvel/reviews/?type=user

brie larson has already said this isnt for me.i'll spend my money elsewhere from someone called Kevin H.

There's five pages of them. Looks like about 20 per page.

Blogger Bobo #117 February 20, 2019 3:31 PM  

I wish I that (((clever))).

Blast these pesky Anglo-Saxon genes!!

Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother February 20, 2019 3:32 PM  

Wow devastating review bomb oh noes

Blogger Dave Dave February 20, 2019 3:34 PM  

@4. They're not even reviews. It's a comment whether or not the user is interested in seeing the movie or not.

Blogger Inner Monologue February 20, 2019 3:36 PM  

Hey journalists, if you write "Why Star Wars IX is a Masterpiece" right now, you'll get out ahead of the trolls

Blogger veryfunnyminion February 20, 2019 3:38 PM  

That well be good and poisoned.

Blogger veryfunnyminion February 20, 2019 3:40 PM  

Oh man, I just noticed the quote comes from themarysue.com.

Meta-awareness squared.

Blogger Johnny February 20, 2019 3:42 PM  

>>Women are very rarely interested in action movies...

Women will go along with an action movie, but yeah, its not really their focus of interest. I always took the love story sub plot as a way of keeping the female in the theater along with they guy. Is even that not PC now?

Blogger Lazarus February 20, 2019 3:50 PM  

Enthusiasm is admirable, but timing is important too.

Blogger Longtime Lurker February 20, 2019 3:53 PM  

Review bombed 3 weeks early?

Corporate is displeased!

Blogger Dave W. February 20, 2019 3:54 PM  

The MarySue lying? *GASP* UNPOSSIBLE!

Blogger Elijah February 20, 2019 3:54 PM  

i don't get brie larson. she rose to fame as the homely chick that was raped for years in a dudes basement /prison in that weird movie "Room"s.

she is not attractive. she has followed the approved script handed to all hollywood starlets and screams our her feminism.

why would marvel hand her the first female lead super hero movie? of course there was never any real call for a female lead marvel movie.

Blogger Dave February 20, 2019 3:56 PM  

Oh man, they will never get over the All- girl Ghostbusters was not a hit.

Blogger Damelon Brinn February 20, 2019 4:14 PM  

"....angry impotent men....which suffered from massive downvoting of the trailer...."

Huh. They don't sound so impotent after all, if they can completely override a 9-figure Hollywood marketing budget and all the friendly media that comes with it.

Blogger Salt February 20, 2019 4:18 PM  

Captain Marvelette. That's better.

Blogger swiftfoxmark2 February 20, 2019 4:24 PM  

Here's a quote on her character's appearance in the upcoming Avengers film:

Screenwriter Christopher Markus stated that Danvers' powers are on a scale that has not previously existed in the MCU and likened her personality to Rogers', "which is sort of a person who's right and knows they're right and doesn't really want to hear it when you tell them they're wrong".

So basically, she uber-powerful, always right, and doesn't want to hear men mansplaining.

I really wish they just have her get the page from Nick Fury in the beginning and then suddenly she turns to dust and the film flashes forward one year to Steve Rogers in the support group.

Blogger Peaceful Poster February 20, 2019 4:27 PM  

Oh man, they will never get over the All- girl Ghostbusters was not a hit.

Milo did nothing wrong.

Blogger Ron February 20, 2019 4:29 PM  

Bounding Into Comics has a post up about critics giving Capt Marvel rave reviews. They're trying to build enthusiasm for a movie they know is in trouble .

Blogger Welleran February 20, 2019 4:33 PM  

"angry virgins are pathetic let's mock them"
"latest mass shooter was an angry virgin, toxic masculinity is to blame"
"angry virgins are pathetic lets mock them"

After a certain point you have to wonder if it's on purpose, the genius of it is I can't tell if the plan is stupid or the plotters.

Blogger JohnofAustria February 20, 2019 4:48 PM  

What's really funny is most of the quotes at time of press were just people responding to the RT survey saying that they didnt want to see it, and why. Total comments were maybe 100-120 at the time.

A very undersized brigade. They are casting about to find villains.

Blogger JohnofAustria February 20, 2019 4:51 PM  

We are simultaneously impotent and petty, and so powerful that we must be fought by all goodthink complaint citizens.

Schroedenger's troll.

Blogger Achilles February 20, 2019 4:52 PM  

It's funny that they assume the bussed in audiences that existed for Black Panther will exist for Captain Marvel. Is Feige making this error or are the ((((powers that be))) overriding his so-far good judgment.

Blogger Timmy3 February 20, 2019 4:57 PM  

Brie Larson has single handedly ruined her own box office. It would be bad enough if others built bad publicity for her, but she has gone over backwards to ensure men will not see it. Whatever is left in box office projections is the more casual viewer and non-Marvel fan. Maybe a few women who have their girls night out without cats. I expect much lower projections like $30 million instead of the $80 million, which was already lowered from $160 million opening weekend. Disney has ruined its latest franchises. Goodbye Marvel. Nice knowing you.

Blogger Matt Sellitto February 20, 2019 5:00 PM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger Matt Sellitto February 20, 2019 5:01 PM  

Just to make things clear to those wondering these are not "reviews" per se but RT let's people comment on whether they "want to see" a movie or not and leave comments.

There are many people who are saying they will not see this movie, particularly in light of Brie Larson's comments about her feminist views and her negative comments about white men.

I'll probably skip this one.

Blogger Ransom Smith February 20, 2019 5:01 PM  

Depending on how big her role in "Avengers Endgame" is, we may have a similar The Last Jedi situation where repeat viewings go down massively compared to the previous installment.

Blogger Damn the torpedos February 20, 2019 5:08 PM  

We are angry men.

And angry men change things.

So watch out overlords.

Blogger Crew February 20, 2019 5:10 PM  

@7: Yeah, they are not reviews.

Blogger Damn the torpedos February 20, 2019 5:11 PM  

“Milo did nothing wrong”

I reread his review of that “film” whenever I want a good laugh.

His wit never disappoints.

Blogger Laramie Hirsch February 20, 2019 5:17 PM  

Cheese Larson is a racist, sexist bigot. I doubt I ‘ll even bother watching Captain Misandry on a streaming service. Why is Marvel being ruined? Because they want to turn it into the heavily opinionated Sana Amanat Company. At the cost of all of Disney’s profits. Everything Disney touches gets ruined. Star Wars, Marvel, and princess movies…all shit. If you’re a straight male, Disney hates you. This world needs less and less liberal, irreligious, white women. They should be denied employment, companionship, and social courtesy. There's clearly too many of these privileged medusas running around in this culture.

Blogger The Only Cigar in the Box February 20, 2019 5:28 PM  

Brie Larson: I hate white men. White men are stupid. Get them away from me. Where is the diverse female press?

Me: Since you disregard me and my opinion, I'm not going to go see your movie.

Brie: Misogynist. Patriarchal scum. Go back to the basement, you worm. I am a Feminist! Here me roar!

*Movie does not meet box office expectations.*

Disney PR Machine: The sexist, misogynistic fan base has dragged down our profits. This is not our fault.

Interviewer: What are you going to do about that? Are you going to continue making woke Feminist Marvel movies?

Disney PR: You bet your ass we are!

Blogger Cataline Sergius February 20, 2019 5:28 PM  

The preview reviews are now coming in. Prepare yourself for a shock.

The critics LOVE it! I mean they completely and totally love it!

That proves it's a good movie!

Blogger eclecticme February 20, 2019 5:31 PM  

I liked Brie Larson in Room and in Short Term 12. Why did she shoot herself in the foot like that?

Men like strong woman leads, just not movies that suck. Alien, Terminator movies did just fine without insulting men. Columbiana was great IMO.

Blogger SciVo February 20, 2019 5:32 PM  

Noah B The Savage Gardener wrote:Does she have other facial expressions or is bitchface all she's got?

Brie Larson reminds me of Thamsanqa Jantjie, the fake sign language interpreter at Nelson Mandela's memorial service. She's in way over her head in trying to project power and confidence, and mistakenly thinks that "impassive" is a safe way to fake it. But that isn't what actual pros do.

Blogger OneWingedShark February 20, 2019 5:32 PM  

JohnofAustria wrote:A very undersized brigade. They are casting about to find villains.
No, not villains: scapegoats.
The villain is, as we see here, already decided: "incels" — essentially the old high-school taunt "Virgin!" given a new set of clothes — no, what they need is a "pre-existing condition" as to why they (the writers, actors, etc) really aren't responsible.

It's really just the old feminist mentality: "I can make my own decisions!" → "Okay." → "I made bad decisions! It's not my fault though because…" (essentially boils down to I'm an object, things happen to me, and nothing is my fault!).

Or, as JohnofAustria wrote:We are simultaneously impotent and petty, and so powerful that we must be fought by all goodthink complaint citizens.

Schroedenger's troll.

Blogger Lovekraft February 20, 2019 5:32 PM  

Infinity Gauntlet #6 (of 6) *SPOILER* has the glove being wielded by Adam Warlock at the end. Thanos is in exile and his summation is he is better off than Warlock who is now imprisoned, in a way, by the responsibility. Thanos served his purpose in the overall scheme.

The comic seems to delve further into the philosophical issues than the first movie. The movie tends to make it to be about nihilistic extremism versus some type of cosmic balance by ... scattering the stones? Will Larson's entry introduce her being the one to decide how the stones are distributed?

Warlock was more a peripheral Marvel character for me, but one that had a lot of clout and weight. Captain Marvel and her Kree association would really diminish how the Infinity Stones are presented if she pulls out the 'it's a woman's turn reeez'.

Blogger Michael Maier February 20, 2019 5:34 PM  

Was that the KONG broad? She wasn't interesting in the least in that movie.

Blogger artensoll February 20, 2019 5:37 PM  

@33 "Cheese Larson"

Bland cheese Larson. FIFY.

Blogger Andre B February 20, 2019 5:39 PM  

Ah Vox, the lesbian who wrote that article is talking about the audience ratings. Before the film is released, the Rotten Tomatoes user can vote if he wants to see the movie or not, and say why. The "want to see" score is currently at 58%. The majority of the people who voted "not interested" cite as reason "Brie Larson said this movie isn't for me". That's all there is to it.

Chelsea Steiner, the author of that article is fat and bisexual, and also a "sex educator". She drinks diet coke, because she is a fat whore. She is probably a jew.

Blogger Cataline Sergius February 20, 2019 5:46 PM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger Jon Mollison February 20, 2019 5:46 PM  

Ten years ago Disney couldn't develop IP popular with young boys in house, so they simply bought them. Marvel and Star Wars were supposed to bring the young male demographic into the House of Mouse the way the Princess line had done so for girls. At least, that was the narrative back then.

Now? What once looked like crashing the value of SW and Marvel through incompetence looks more and more like malice. You would be hard pressed to chart a course more efficient at driving young men away from Marvel and SW than the one Disney took. "If you won't play with our dolls, you don't get to play with anything."

On a related issue: When does the Alt*Hero toy line come out? I've got a strong hankering to put a King Ace action figure on my shelf at work.

Blogger Cataline Sergius February 20, 2019 5:51 PM  

The big question is, will Captain Marvel be a Mary Sue or a Gary Stew?

The Mary Sue is special merely by existing.

This is a big part of why they are so fundamentally weak as characters. Since a Mary Sue is already super perfect the moment you meet her, there really isn’t much room for a character arc. She can’t grow because there is no room for her to grow.

The Gary Stew is special only by his actions.

Sure he can beat up an army of cyborg-ninjas all by himself but he couldn’t do that over night. He had to go through a shit ton of brutal training to get there. Which meant that he had to have a strong motivation to put himself through that kind of hell. That strongly implies some kind of tragic event in his life that gives him the driving force necessary to become the bad ass that can take down an army of cyborg-ninjas. There was some natural talent there, sure. But he didn’t get there by talent alone.

To maintain his identity, the Gary Stew has to keep doing more and more spectacular shit.

The Mary Sue on the other hand only has to sit there and accept the fawning praise of everyone she meets.


In truth I won't know for certain until I see it. I'd be pretty surprised if Fiege allowed a Mary Sue to happen.

However this is a Feminist movie and they strongly trend toward Mary Sues.

Blogger Damelon Brinn February 20, 2019 5:52 PM  

"If anyone needs someone to write a Social Justice Warrior origin story, call me."

One of the best things about this timeline is watching SJWs job-hunt in the middle of their articles.

Blogger InformationMerchant February 20, 2019 5:52 PM  

Hilariously even some progressive SJWish Marvel fanboys are skipping the movie.

It's always wonderful when this happens. That schadenfreude kick from Hollywood going too far for the moderate SJWs is so good.

Blogger Duke Norfolk February 20, 2019 6:01 PM  

swiftfoxmark2 wrote:sort of a person who's right and knows they're right and doesn't really want to hear it when you tell them they're wrong

Oh yeah, every man's dream.

God I hate these people.

Blogger Silent Draco February 20, 2019 6:12 PM  

Cheese Larson. Yeah, that look could curdle a water buffalo from five miles away. The only benefit is an unending supply of good mozzarella, if you can get it out of the water buffalo.

Blogger Dr Caveman February 20, 2019 6:12 PM  

And of course the (((author))) is a fat tub of lard

Blogger Laramie Hirsch February 20, 2019 6:15 PM  

@42 LOL!

Blogger R.G. Camara February 20, 2019 6:18 PM  

Again, race is not gender. People are less loyal to their gender than they are to their race. This is why Black Panther could get blacks to rally and Captain Marvel will not. This has "disappointing box office" written all over it.

It will make money/a profit---it's an MCU movie with their typical quality attached (hopefully), it's close enough to Endgame to be a required appetizer, and she's going to have an outsized role in Endgame--but it will be a disappointment. So a The Last Jedi-type disappointment more than a Girlbusters-disappointment.

But this:


Screenwriter Christopher Markus stated that Danvers' powers are on a scale that has not previously existed in the MCU and likened her personality to Rogers', "which is sort of a person who's right and knows they're right and doesn't really want to hear it when you tell them they're wrong".


In what universe is Captain America of the MCU like that? Captain America is the moral center of the team, always considering others' point of view and ideas respectfully but also exploring their trustworthiness, unless things become critical, and then he makes a choice, usually by sacrificing himself for the greater good. This was a really bad way to make Captain Marvel seem heroic, because the description doesn't work here for Cap in the MCU.

The description is for a feminazi man-hater or some crazy lunatic; I'll bet Cheese Larson ignores her military superior's orders a lot in her movie because she knows better---despite it being, you know, the military, which requires obedience to get the jobs done. I'll bet they try to make her a Maverick-type hotshot from Top Gun in her "rebellion", which will fail completely due to her gender and to the fact that this is not Top Gun.

Blogger Justin Bailey February 20, 2019 6:25 PM  

They aren't even talking about troll review bombs. They are complaining that people are using the Rotten Tomatoes system as intended to indicate they aren't interested in seeing the movie. Brie Larson said she doesn't want white men to see the movie. I'm more than happy to oblige.

Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother February 20, 2019 6:29 PM  

The trailer opening scenes where she and her dindu Hultgreen-Curie victim strut out of the hangar are super Top Gun esque looking, so I guarantee a Maverick with tits play.

Blogger Dr Caveman February 20, 2019 6:35 PM  

@42
Yup. A quick google search shows that she regularly harangues her 'fellow whites'

Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother February 20, 2019 6:38 PM  

This is a job for Lieutenant Governor Justin Fairfax.

Blogger Pierre Truc February 20, 2019 7:03 PM  

> Laramie Hirsch wrote: Cheese Larson

Yeah, this is what Brie
looks like in French.

Blogger Arcane Rhino February 20, 2019 7:09 PM  

Wait a minute, I am a little confused.

From Infogalactic.com: "Captain Marvel, also known as Shazam, is... the alter ego of Billy Batson, a boy who, by speaking the magic word "Shazam", can transform himself into a costumed adult with the powers of superhuman strength, speed, flight, and other abilities."

Isn't Shazam the movie coming out in April?

While I admit I have not paid very close attention to the Captain Marvel trailer, from my half-arsed recollection, there is absolutely NOTHING similar between the "Captain Marvel" movie and the Shazam story.

Am I missing something? Are there dueling "Captain Marvel" franchises? Does this movie in ANY way relate to the Captain Marvel story?

Dudes love hot heroines, but object to beloved characters being sexually reassigned. (Hell, I get bent out of shape when movies deviate from the books. The blasphemy “The Hobbit” is a case in point. And don’t even get me started on all of the King Arthur abominations…) In short, did ANYONE bitch about Rebel because we had too many female protagonists?

I am genuinely confused by the marketing decisions I am seeing in play. They are dying on a hill of their own intentional making. Why didn’t they just make the film with an original protagonist name? I would probably have at least watched it with my wife on Netflix.

Blogger Cataline Sergius February 20, 2019 7:09 PM  

Marvel actually had to hire another woman to play Captain Marvel's butt.

Not joking about that.

Brie Larson had to have a stunt butt because her's is flat as a pancake.

The power of feminism.

Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother February 20, 2019 7:20 PM  

The wages of skipping leg day are terrifying.

Blogger OneWingedShark February 20, 2019 7:23 PM  

Arcane Rhino wrote:Am I missing something? Are there dueling "Captain Marvel" franchises? Does this movie in ANY way relate to the Captain Marvel story?
Yes, there are/were dueling franchises.
In the olden-days Fawcett Comics had Captain Marvel, who was kinda-sorta like Superman and did some similar stuff. DC took them to court and lost, but eventually bought Fawcett Comics and the character/franchise, and did nothing with it. During the interim Marvel made their own Captain Marvel.

And then DC decided to do things with their Captain Marvel.
So you had a weird situation where Marvel had a Trademark on "Captain Marvel" while DC had the Copyright on "Captain Marvel". Then with DC's massive EVERYTHING "New 52" reboot they changed the character's name to Shazam, which may or may not have been due to another lawsuit (I'm fuzzy on details there).

I'm sure I'm butchering the history, but that's the Quick-and-Dirty.

Blogger jfreddd February 20, 2019 7:26 PM  

“a few women who have their girls night out without cats”

Opprtunity: Cat-friendly theatres

Blogger Arcane Rhino February 20, 2019 7:26 PM  

@61 Thanks.

Blogger Johnny February 20, 2019 7:30 PM  

So far what we have are a small number of critics doing the usual thing, kissing up to Disney, and some fanboys who are pissed about Brie Larson's interview. If it is really not that good we won't see a lot of reviews until it opens.

Blogger maniacprovost February 20, 2019 7:30 PM  

I expect the movie to be good, and I want to see it. But, I'll have to see exactly how much the cast hates me before giving them my money.

Blogger eclecticme February 20, 2019 7:32 PM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger English Tom February 20, 2019 7:34 PM  

@Cataline

Re: a stunt butt

I heard there's a 2 for 1 special offer on eBay!

Blogger Jon Mollison February 20, 2019 7:38 PM  

@54: Oh, it gets better. Captain Marvel's cat's name is "Goose". And part of the marketing push for the movie revolves around how great Goose is in the film. Because no feminist film project would be complete without a massive nod to the all important cat-lady demographic.

We can all pack it in, the jokes write themselves at this point.

Blogger Steve February 20, 2019 7:52 PM  

Captain Marvel looks terrible, and that's a good thing.

Hopefully this means capeshit movies are finally on the decline. It's been almost 20 years since X-MEN and SPIDERMAN came out, and since then there have been over 9,000 superhero films. It's even more oversaturated than the Holocaust and Talking Dog genres put together.

And it's slightly horrifying to see mass entertainment dumbed down so much, so quickly. The 90's had plenty of big daft movies like INDEPENDENCE DAY, but also produced lots of high quality middlebrow entertainment - THE MATRIX, FIGHT CLUB, GLADIATOR, etc. A category which seems to have been completely extinguished from popular culture with the rise of neverending cinematic universes for goony manchildren.

Remember - just 20 years ago, normal people would've thought there was something wrong with grown men spending so much time and money on wish-fulfilment fantasies for six-year-old boys. The sort of awkward nerds who camped outside theatres to see THE PHANTOM MENACE were figures of fun - plastic laser-swords and all. Now? It feels like we're up to our balls in fortysomething chronological adults who seem deeply, unhealthily invested in exactly how Captain Fantastic and The Brown Panther will defeat Chin-darr and his magic rhinestone glove in DISNEY'S MARVEL'S THE TOXIC MASCULINITY AVENGERS PART XLVIII

It's all bollocks, isn't it? And I thought Peter Jackson was greedy for stretching out the LOTR movies into an increasingly lame and bloated trilogy. But at least that was just three movies with an actual end (or twelve endings, if you bought the Director's Cut) - Disney thinks they can sell us two hundred and forty three flicks about people in spandex punching each other against a green screen and/or angsty teen space wizards every year until the San Andreas fault finally does the Lord's work and drags these grasping sexual predators down to the fiery depths where they belong forever.

Besides, what else can be done with the genre?

In the space of a few years, they've already gone through 3 or 4 different Spidermen (I don't care enough to check), 2 or 3 Batmen, whole classrooms of X-Persons, and a brace of Supermen. That's a worse attrition rate than if a school bus accidentally pulled up at a pool party jointly hosted by James Gunn and Bryan Singer.

Robert Downey Jr is now Robert Downey Sr. Chris Evans and Thor are now middle aged men. They can't keep doing the same old stuff, and yet nobody wants to see their roles recast, and the novelty factor of obscure D-list characters like DR STRANGE, ANT MAN and BLACK PANTHER won't hold up forever. So where do you go when you've already abraded the base of the firkin?

Apparently you go to Brie Larson, who has all the carefree charm of Ashley Judd holding a slam poetry session about the menopause.

Good! Let the MCU die, kill it if you have to.

Blogger FUBARwest February 20, 2019 8:01 PM  

Iirc there are critic reviews out for it and they praise the movie. Best part of Captain Marvel, according to the critics, was her cat. They all raved about her cat. Wasnt planning on seeing this one anyway but it's a definite pass now.

Endgame is the last Marvel movie for me. They've signaled the direction they are headed in with this and BP, and they want to make a Ms Marvel movie(the muslim one). Convergence process is about to be complete

Blogger Steve Canyon February 20, 2019 8:05 PM  

Can't make a movie that succeeds on its own merits, so play the grrl power card and make watching it a way to thumb your nose at men. Basically the Hillary '16 campaign applied to movies. Enough pussyhatters will make this movie make 80 million. Won't be another Black Panther though. Enough young gals will get dragged to this movie until the lot of them figure out it's a movie for fat boomer chicks, then will want nothing to do with it because the last thing women want is to emulate something that makes them look old.

I'm saving my 10 bucks for the Alt Hero-Q movie.

Blogger eclecticme February 20, 2019 8:06 PM  

Alita Battle Angel looks good but the SJWs don't like it.

Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother February 20, 2019 8:07 PM  

I'll watch Where Eagles Dare instead with my sons, thanks.

Blogger Madame Ringading February 20, 2019 8:10 PM  

Give me Guns of Navarrone and Ice Station Zebra any day.

Blogger Vaughan Williams February 20, 2019 8:11 PM  

We need to bring back the old punishments for gossiping, updated for modern technology. For instance, require that the front page of every news website and print paper proclaim "we were caught in this lie. sorry" for a month or whatever suits the thing they lied about, the reputation they destroyed. Make them publicly humiliate themselves.

Blogger SemiSpook37 February 20, 2019 8:12 PM  

All of this could have been avoided by Limberger Larson having the sense enough to not be "woke" in her desire to not have a specific segment of society on the press tour. Oddly enough, this is the segment of society that until recently wanted to see the film. I've said it before, but there's a reason there haven't been any discussions of the next phase of the MCU past the next Spider-Man. I have a feeling that if this film doesn't do as well as expected, Feige will make the decision to relegate Captain Marvel to Hulk status after Endgame.

This means she's a sidekick and loses any standalone film leads. You think I'm kidding? That's how they shoehorned the "Planet Hulk" storyline into Thor: Ragnarok.

Blogger Doktor Jeep February 20, 2019 8:17 PM  

So here is how I see it. Take Doctor Who for example. Remember when they cast a woman for that role? Here is how it went:
fan:"hmm a female Doctor Who. Well I suppose since the doctor regenerates and all that and science fiction and such it would be reasonable that in the timeline.... "
SJW:"Ha ha Shitlord! A female Doctor Who! Don't you hate that? You DOOOO! Ha ha! CRY MOAR MALE TEARS! HA HA"
Fan:"Ah screw it I'm not going to watch this crap then"
SJW:"MISOGYNY!!!!"

Blogger Bob Loblaw February 20, 2019 8:18 PM  

This really is like the execrable Ghostbusters film. It's in the can, they realize it's going to bomb, so they start a Social Justice food fight which gives them a reason for its terrible opening weekend.

Blogger minority of one February 20, 2019 8:18 PM  

"Robert Downey Jr is now Robert Downey Sr. Chris Evans and Thor are now middle aged men. They can't keep doing the same old stuff, and yet nobody wants to see their roles recast, and the novelty factor of obscure D-list characters like DR STRANGE, ANT MAN and BLACK PANTHER won't hold up forever. So where do you go when you've already abraded the base of the firkin?"

Knowing boomertards they'll just bring in Stallone or Swarzenegger

Blogger Chris Mallory February 20, 2019 8:26 PM  

Steve wrote:And it's slightly horrifying to see mass entertainment dumbed down so much, so quickly.

You must have been watching the wrong movies.
The best three movies I have seen in the past couple years were all about White Men.
"Only the Brave" about a hotshot wildfire crew. An almost all white movie. Maybe a few background minorities.
"Hacksaw Ridge" A WW2 Pacific theater movie, so it does have Japs, but it is still a movie about White Men for White Men.
"Deepwater Horizon". A mostly White Male movie, a few females and blacks in secondary roles. But it is a true story and they tried to honor the people involved.

Blogger Edgar Abbey February 20, 2019 8:27 PM  

Captain Marvel was doomed from the start when the writers decided that the source material would have to be discarded in toto. That nothing was salvageable. That is complete bunk. The old comic books were popular for a reason.

Blogger Thought Criminal February 20, 2019 8:30 PM  

#69

O'Steve, we've missed you...

Blogger Azure Amaranthine February 20, 2019 8:40 PM  

"The wages of skipping leg day are terrifying."

Indeed. If leg day is the only day you DON'T skip, on the other hand, you're probably fine.

Blogger Chris Mallory February 20, 2019 8:41 PM  

Neither of the two Endgame trailers I have seen featured Captain Marvel in any way.

It doesn't sound like the Ruso Brothers were very happy about having to shoehorn her into the movie.

Blogger Skyler the Weird February 20, 2019 8:48 PM  

Marvel's Green Lantern.

Blogger sammibandit February 20, 2019 8:48 PM  

The comment section at TMS is just like a gossip site in open hostility and karma chains. I guess the rumor is true that a lot of ONTD! migrated there from LiveJournal.

Any time a group of commenters from a niche fandom got really excited at ONTD! about a specific release and its PR notes, a flop was sure at about 60 - 70% of guesses. It's like the steady stream of PR straight from the studio signals a dud.

In the recent past big cape movie franchises were staffed by actresses speaking outside the norm. Megan Fox was canned for her Michael Bay notes and ScarJo was at the Women's MarchTM inaugural seance. The difference is that latter did it as part of her press package and the former did it as a value-added. Hollywood clearly is aware of actresses being mouthpieces, even in the times up era.

So we can assume even at chance that the movie is a dud. We can raise that probability 10% because of lame press releases like her "boys are gross" comments, and the twee "the cat is so cool and central to the plot" screener reviews on Twitter. A superhero movie where the protagonist isn't in the lead takeaway? Not good.

I say this movie is a flop at 60% confidence.

Blogger sammibandit February 20, 2019 8:50 PM  

Oh, where do I get the other 10% from? She's a pancake-butt.

Blogger Dave February 20, 2019 8:54 PM  

Thought Criminal wrote:#69

O'Steve, we've missed you...



But wait, is it the real Steve? I wanna believe it is but he's already hating a movie that we're being told prominently features Captain Marvel's cat.

Blogger Man of the Atom February 20, 2019 8:57 PM  

Salt wrote:Captain Marvelette. That's better.

Captain MarvelSue. That's best.

Blogger S1AL February 20, 2019 8:59 PM  

"So you had a weird situation where Marvel had a Trademark on "Captain Marvel" while DC had the Copyright on "Captain Marvel". Then with DC's massive EVERYTHING "New 52" reboot they changed the character's name to Shazam, which may or may not have been due to another lawsuit (I'm fuzzy on details there)."

My understanding is that DC allowed the trademark/copyright/whatever to lapse, and Marvel, of course, snapped it right up.

Blogger Garuna February 20, 2019 8:59 PM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger Garuna February 20, 2019 9:04 PM  

This could be a major watershed moment for pop culture.

Marvel is BELOVED globally. And 2018-2019 is the period that'll probably be remembered as the brand's peak. Black Panther was just nominated for an Oscar for Best Picture. The two Thanos movies are the culmination of the 10 years of buildup. The first one made 2 billion dollars and ended on an iconic cliffhanger. The next one will surely make 2 billion too. And more importantly, it'll be the final Avengers film with the original cast. After this, most of the original Avengers are either retiring or taking a backseat to the new ones.

Captain Marvel is confirmed to play a major role in the final battle against Thanos. And it is being promoted as Black Panther for women, with a similar release date leading directly into the Avengers.

This should be a slam dunk. The best Hollywood has to offer. If it underperforms, then we know that the "anti-SJW" sentiment has hit a level previously not thought possible.

This is how we can measure Captain Marvel's success by Marvel's 2019 standards:
1) TOP Marvel is over $2 billion. This is Avengers level.
2) HIGH Marvel is between $1-2 billion. This is Iron Man, Black Panther, and Captain America level.
3) AVERAGE Marvel is $800 million-$1 billion. This is Thor, Guardians Of The Galaxy, and Spider-Man level.

Anywhere below this is underperforming. Ant-Man & Wasp made $623 million last year. Marvel is considering cancelling the sequel to that one because they consider it too low. If Captain Marvel is anywhere in the $600-700 million territory, we win. If it is below this territory, we break Marvel.

Blogger Jonathan February 20, 2019 9:22 PM  

Does Hollywood make only superhero and holocaust movies?

Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother February 20, 2019 9:27 PM  

"
This should be a slam dunk. The best Hollywood has to offer. If it underperforms, then we know that the "anti-SJW" sentiment has hit a level previously not thought possible."

Garuna,

Are you implying the level not thought possible could be...OVER 9000??

Blogger wahr01 February 20, 2019 9:29 PM  

@4

Looks like the article did what it was supposed to do: incite a a feminist brigade on Rotten Tomatoes.

Here's a golden one:

"James B February 20, 2019
As a white male I can say I am excited for this movie, and that is made for me and everyone else."

Blogger Johnny February 20, 2019 9:47 PM  

>>Looks like the article did what it was supposed to do: incite a a feminist brigade on Rotten Tomatoes.

Could be they want opposition. Pit the movie against real or imaginary male chauvinism. Possible reason the movie isn't that good and they want to frame the opposition.

I am a sucker for the visuals and I don't get off on the movie's trailers. They don't seem up the the usual very high Marvel standard.

If you want to see this stuff and you don't want to give money to Disney, forget the new releases. Watch it after it has been out on dvd for a couple of months. That is almost no money to the studio at all.

Blogger sammibandit February 20, 2019 9:57 PM  

@Dave

Early Captain Marvel Reviews Are Positively Glowing

And worse still.

Is Captain Marvel‘s Goose The First-Ever Pet of the MCU?

Blogger Quilp February 20, 2019 10:11 PM  

From the same site:
A Rose Tico Series Is Everything We Want and Deserve From Star Wars
https://www.themarysue.com/rose-tico-disney-star-wars-series-yes-please/
I have no words.

Blogger Solon February 20, 2019 10:22 PM  

Hacksaw Ridge was ruined for me by Vince Vaughan. After seeing Wedding Crashers and Dodgeball, he's like Jim Carey status for me: can't take him seriously when he tries to play a serious role.

Every scene he was in I just kept imagining him laughing uproarously with wedding cake smashed all over his face.

Apart from that, yeah, it was a fine movie. Nothing wrong with relating the story of a Medal of Honor recipient, even if he was some conscientious objector who had no place on a battlefield. I sure as hell wouldn't want to share a foxhole with him, anyway.

Blogger John Bradley February 20, 2019 10:45 PM  

Are we certain that themarysue.com isn't an elaborate troll site run by Godfrey Elfwick? I find it unimaginable that anyone could seriously want "Rose Tico: A Star Wars Story"...

Blogger Fozzy Bear February 20, 2019 11:07 PM  

If Captain Marvel is anywhere in the $600-700 million territory, we win. If it is below this territory, we break Marvel.
Can I sign up for a gofundme to hire busses to take kids away from theaters that day? Give them each a bag full of Arkhaven comics as a bonus?

Blogger The Pitchfork Rebel February 20, 2019 11:09 PM  

Is Chelsea Steiner a thinly veiled nom de plume for Chelsea Clinton?

Blogger Doug Cranmer February 20, 2019 11:10 PM  

It's all narrative all the time.

Here: "Pixar's Emotional New Short Will Make a Pet Lover Out of You"

https://io9.gizmodo.com/pixars-emotional-new-short-will-make-a-pet-lover-out-of-1832767871

Catch the ending? And then you immediately connect to the dog's abuser.

And in the comments everyone feelz good and self congratulatory.

They hate us absolutely. They have no idea what they're bringing down on themselves someday.

Blogger One Deplorable DT February 20, 2019 11:18 PM  

The viciousness of this review bombing campaign is particularly noteworthy given that the bomb-to-be isn't even reviewable on Rotten Tomatoes yet.

What is it that SJWs always do again? I just can't seem to remember....

Blogger Ransom Smith February 20, 2019 11:24 PM  

A Rose Tico Series Is Everything We Want and Deserve From Star Wars
https://www.themarysue.com/rose-tico-disney-star-wars-series-yes-please/
I have no words.

I predicted on this very blog some months back and I'll reiterate.
Bob Iger the Disney CEO gave Kathleen Kennedy a contract extension because he's setting her up to be the Star Wars scapegoat.
When Episode 9 fails, he'll fire her and make some big press release about working harder to protect the brand.
Guys like Iger didn't advance to where they are without caring about the bottom line.

Blogger Eli February 20, 2019 11:47 PM  

Seeing as themarysue.com was created in 2011 and is geared towards "highlighting women in the geek world, and providing a prominent place for the voices of geek women" convinces me that the mainstreaming of geek culture was a mistake. Women follow after men and the influx of women into geek culture (videogames/comics/SFF etc.) seems rather convenient the last 10 or so years. That's why I can't take sites like that seriously. They are johnny come lately to a scene due to it's overwhelming popularity. If geek culture becomes a thing to be ostracized over like it once was decades ago sites like the mary sue will disappear tomorrow.

Blogger Tatooine Sharpshooters' Club February 21, 2019 12:14 AM  

@106 - "What-evah, guy, I've been like totally into geek culture for like ev-er. We just need to change one thing about it, and that's everything about it. It's like so pale male and stale it's like, gross! Ugh, you homos, I mean, incels, just can't handle a STRONG WOMAN!"

Blogger Bob Loblaw February 21, 2019 12:36 AM  

Captain Marvel was doomed from the start when the writers decided that the source material would have to be discarded in toto. That nothing was salvageable. That is complete bunk. The old comic books were popular for a reason.

Which source material? This is a franchise that's been rebooted five times in the last seven years.

Blogger Stilicho February 21, 2019 2:37 AM  

The ultimate pre-thought cirme is being a white man, preferably Christian.

Conviction is automatic and hordes of blue-hairs and neck-beards fantasize about being the executioners.

Blogger wahr01 February 21, 2019 3:50 AM  

@106

Arguably the defining characteristic of "geekdom" is its lack of social acceptance.
Therefore any attempt at "main-streaming" is merely the chads moving in to culturally plunder the geek community.

Again, the 3 laws of SJW apply: SJW's always project, pretending to be victims as they engage in cultural imperialism of the spaces geeks created after being ostracized in their youth.

Blogger Franz Lyonheart February 21, 2019 3:56 AM  

@69

Welcome back Steve!

As ever...., your comment wins the thread. :)

Blogger Up from the pond February 21, 2019 5:10 AM  

It would have been smarter to cast a brave black woman for the role. "Sha-ZAM!" will not sound funky coming from Brie Larson.

Blogger RobertDWood February 21, 2019 7:51 AM  

I hereby nominate Stg58 for best comic comment of the post.

Blogger Pavlosky Ufanov February 21, 2019 7:56 AM  

@72
eclecticme wrote:Alita Battle Angel looks good but the SJWs don't like it.

Go watch Alita is decent entertainment, keep in mind that it is an adaptation of a Japanese Manga, women behave like women and men behave like men. It is not perfect by any means, but IMHO a great adaptation.

Blogger JohnofAustria February 21, 2019 9:54 AM  

*if you're a wahmen

Blogger JohnofAustria February 21, 2019 9:57 AM  

ItIt closing in on 6,000,000

Blogger Jack Aubrey February 21, 2019 10:37 AM  

Did anyone else read the article excerpt and think Scalzi had written it? He's dressed up as a woman so maybe he's writing as one now. It only lacked the use of "dudebro" to make it certain.

Blogger Athelstane February 25, 2019 3:50 AM  

"If it is below this territory, we break Marvel."

Well, with 20 successful films banking $17.5 billion, I think Marvel can survive one bomb.

But it *would* almost certainly kill any Captain Marvel standalone franchise, and that would be a win worth having.

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