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Tuesday, July 23, 2019

A true genius of science

I have a theory that Neal deGrasse Tyson is actually Eddie Murphy in a scientist suit.


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94 Comments:

Blogger Stilicho July 23, 2019 8:04 AM  

All you can do is laugh at his uncontrollable urge to display his stupidity. Besides, didn't he get the NYT memo: Apollo 11 and the whole Apollo program was an achievement of a repressive patriarchy that no one else has been able to replicate.

Blogger Azure Amaranthine July 23, 2019 8:07 AM  

"I have a theory that Neal deGrasse Tyson is actually Eddie Murphy in a scientist suit."

He's funnier than he is smart, apparently. I didn't see that coming.

Blogger Azure Amaranthine July 23, 2019 8:09 AM  

"Besides, didn't he get the NYT memo: Apollo 11 and the whole Apollo program was an achievement of a repressive patriarchy that no one else has been able to replicate."

No, no, no, you see, it's one small step for man, one ponderous leap for every species on Earth.

Harambe is proud, so Neil is too.

Blogger DangerSemiconductor July 23, 2019 8:09 AM  

Under that logic, Apollos 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 13, 14, and 15 were globalist, but Apollos 12, 16 and 17 were nationalist.

Blogger whoops July 23, 2019 8:11 AM  

Yeah cause you know they got those eagles up there on the moon just snatching laurels all day

Blogger CarpeOro July 23, 2019 8:12 AM  

Yeah I can see the Eddie Murphy coming out. Didn't particularly like the remake or the original Jerry Lewis movie for which he created the Tyson character.

Blogger Sillon July 23, 2019 8:13 AM  

If anyone had any doubts on how painfully average black science man is... here is proof straight from the horse's mouth.

He has to go back too.

Blogger Azure Amaranthine July 23, 2019 8:14 AM  

"Yeah cause you know they got those eagles up there on the moon just snatching laurels all day"

They had to send it out to ensure the moon dusts had receded enough for it to be safe for them to exit the lander. Eventually one came back in from the vacuum with the twig, so they sent it out again to ensure that it wouldn't come back, as it had located a comfortable home in the void. After all, freedom is its natural habitat. PETA should, of course, approve.

Blogger Azure Amaranthine July 23, 2019 8:16 AM  

As you can see, Rome has landed on the moon. I mean, their battle standard is right there!

Blogger wreckage July 23, 2019 8:18 AM  

So, putting a shared symbol of imperial conquest and the USA right there is extra cuddly, apparently.

Blogger Jab Burrwalky July 23, 2019 8:18 AM  

Is anyone gonna tell him where Bald Eagles live?

Blogger Azure Amaranthine July 23, 2019 8:19 AM  

Clearly an opaque example of Black Knighthood.

Blogger Azure Amaranthine July 23, 2019 8:21 AM  

"Is anyone gonna tell him where Bald Eagles live?"

Dirty specieist.

Blogger Ray - SoCal July 23, 2019 8:25 AM  

Guess he missed the American national symbol and USA in the earth view...

Blogger Mr.MantraMan July 23, 2019 8:25 AM  

One of Neal's peeps lead the Mule Train March to outside the gates of NASA, and another penned the hit single "Whitey on the Moon." Then another peep in the 70s who was sittin on a committee in the House of Representin put the kibosh on Hubble and Robert Whitaker was part of ginning up some grassroots support for you guessed it, Science.

Blogger The Cooler July 23, 2019 8:27 AM  

Fellow astronaut Jim Lovell suggested the eagle, the national bird of the United States, as the focus of the patch. Running with that proposal, Michael Collins found a picture of an eagle in a National Geographic book about birds: "Water, Prey, and Game Birds of North America," and traced it using a piece of tissue paper.

Being fair, bald eagles are totes racist, y'all. Ever been to Alaska? They've ethnically cleansed the entire state and created a bald eagle paradise.

Blogger MATT July 23, 2019 8:28 AM  

Well, you just have to accept that everyone went to the moon. Some people don't think it be like it, but it do.

Blogger Mr.MantraMan July 23, 2019 8:31 AM  

#16 the racist birds are spreading out, a couple of years ago in my ramshackle suburban abode 35 miles from Chiraq I stepped outside and scared a mature bald eagle off my fence, racis' birds be everywhere and sheeiit.

Blogger Goodnight July 23, 2019 8:32 AM  

The Bald Eagle - official symbol of the human species.

Blogger damaris.tighe July 23, 2019 8:33 AM  

The eagles done it.

Blogger Jack (LJCSOGHMOMAS) July 23, 2019 8:37 AM  

The American flag doesn't have an eagle, but the Mexican flag does. Ergo, Apollo 11 was an achievement of Mexico. It's logic.

Blogger The Cooler July 23, 2019 8:39 AM  

@18 Can't stop progress.

Blogger Matrick July 23, 2019 8:41 AM  

By that logic, the moon landing was an achievement of the Bald Eagle. Or perhaps, to be more inclusive, there is only one race: the avian race.

Seriously though, the Bald Eagle is a symbol of America, so the patch isn't as inclusive as he makes out.

Blogger Daniel July 23, 2019 8:45 AM  

No human is pictured, so it can't be an achievement of the human species. His bird brain caught the avian flew.

Blogger Avalanche July 23, 2019 9:01 AM  

"Achievement of the human species"? If one goes by Tyson's on-the-patch idiocy: it was birds, specifically CLAN EAGLES wot dun it!!

And if it was "all human species" -- then when do the REST of the human species pay THEIR SHARE to the part of the human species that DID pay for the whole thing!?

Tyson must go back.

Blogger Damelon Brinn July 23, 2019 9:05 AM  

That's funny, because moon landing believers keep telling me we haven't gone back because we only went in the first place to beat the Russians, so once we did that there was no reason to continue. Purely a military-capability dick-measuring contest with no followup scientific or exploratory purpose. And we won because America is awesome and kicks everyone's ass whenever we feel like it.

Very it's-a-small-world-after-all of us.

Blogger PseudonymousMe July 23, 2019 9:06 AM  

Yes, the space race was about being the first species on the moon. (The Russians wanted to send a dog).

Blogger Mocheirge July 23, 2019 9:07 AM  

Morons, it's evidence that olive trees reached the moon by utilizing space eagles. And since olive trees are native to the Mediterranean, which borders Africa, that means blacks was the first peepo on the moon.

CHECKMATE RACISTS

Blogger Nikolai Collushnikov July 23, 2019 9:10 AM  

In case you missed it, the Ninth Circuit Court ruled that everyone is American.

Blogger Calvin809 July 23, 2019 9:13 AM  

Now they just need to get some black transgender lesbians back to the Moon to replace the American flag with the homo flag and remove all of the equipment left there.

Blogger Bucephalus July 23, 2019 9:21 AM  

The Nigerians and the Sudanese space programs would have beat us to the moon - except Racism reared its ugly head and stopped Capn’ Dindu from beating us in the space race.

Blogger Brett baker July 23, 2019 9:27 AM  

Eddie Murphy in the Robot Chicken bit about the fallout from Pluto Nash.

Blogger ar10308 July 23, 2019 9:28 AM  

I'm pretty sure he means that Gandalf meant for the Hobbits to have the Eagles fly them and the Ring to the Moon.

Blogger anorganicbear July 23, 2019 9:29 AM  

Apollo 11: When a bald eagle holding an olive branch flew to the moon. Truly a unique accomplishment among the eagle race.

Blogger Remo - Vile Faceless Minion #99 July 23, 2019 9:31 AM  

And no proof either. Owen is right.

Blogger Steve Canyon July 23, 2019 9:33 AM  

Tyson also happens to be the name of a purveyor of processed chicken. Coincidence? I think not.

Blogger Jacob July 23, 2019 10:01 AM  

Cill. My. land. lord.

Blogger Fargoth July 23, 2019 10:03 AM  

All is entertainment. You know, eagles are actually quite dumb birds

Blogger Long Live The West July 23, 2019 10:05 AM  

Not like that eagle is a symbol of any particular country... These people are dumb AND desperate.

Blogger binks webelf July 23, 2019 10:16 AM  

They don't tell you the full horror: Shocking True History!

In 1969, a group of three former U.S. military officers led an invasion of Earth's nearest peaceful neighbour in space. At the end of their eight-day mission, *nobody* was left alive on the Moon! True story.

As far as Tyson fake science man, did he never look at the space suits or the Saturn V rocket, lander, and return capsule? 'United States' printed everywhere, plus the U.S. Flag. What a doofus.

Blogger Skyler the Weird July 23, 2019 10:16 AM  

I wonder if he's qualified for Actor Equity benefits yet?

Blogger Vaughan July 23, 2019 10:18 AM  

No matter how lauded, how accomplished, in non-whites who reside within a white land there is a deep racial shame whose resentment of which burbles like acid poured perpetually down the throat. A language that is not their people's they must speak. A history of accomplishments, of epics and triumphs, of which they may never be a part of surrounds them. Understand how loathed you are for your benevolence. It is for their need of such you are hated completely. All your people ever were will be set to flame, and when that ash mixes with the rain and they can dance in the mud, only then will it be enough.

Blogger Skyler the Weird July 23, 2019 10:20 AM  

@40 It's even worse! Much like Columbus in the Bahamas Two white Imperialists put up a Nationalist Flag to claim this peaceful paradise for American Colonization.

Blogger cecilhenry July 23, 2019 10:21 AM  



Required doctrine today: everything done by Whites is evil, all the food and medicine and everything else we produced was done by “mankind.”




Any 'minority' can achieve anything if White people work hard enough




https://i.imgur.com/5lgzPch.png

Blogger Cataline Sergius July 23, 2019 10:23 AM  

I thought he got #METOOed.

Does he think it's safe to come out now?

It's over Neil. Your "friends" are done pretending you're a genius.

Blogger Argus Bacchus July 23, 2019 10:28 AM  

Those of you who were fans of Chateau Heartiste might remember memes on his blog featuring Neil offering advice according to the infamous 16 Commandments of Poon.

I won't post them here, but I'm sure you can find them after a brief internet search.

Absolutely hilarious stuff.

Blogger English Tom July 23, 2019 10:35 AM  

The eagle dindu nuffin.

Blogger David Ray Milton July 23, 2019 10:38 AM  

The twitter comments on this are worth checking out. They made my morning.

Blogger Robert What? July 23, 2019 10:39 AM  

Didn't a few women MeToo Tyson? Whatever happened wid dat?

Blogger Will July 23, 2019 10:51 AM  

That's hilarious! And describes his level of discourse, sadly.

Blogger Felix Bellator July 23, 2019 10:55 AM  

All the brains of his brother Mike Tyson without the boxing skills.

Blogger Argus Bacchus July 23, 2019 10:55 AM  

@49 Uh oh. Neil might end up in the pokey with a rape conviction like his "brotha" Mike.

Mike offers insight into his relationship with Neil:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AIgdpllCnwc

Blogger Amy July 23, 2019 10:56 AM  

Magic Science Man follows up with a typical blacksplained “my bad” and says the Apollo XIII badge says “humanity” better...it’s a metaphorical rendering of Apollo’s race to pull the sun across the sky. It reads “from the moon, knowledge”

The astronauts, again, chose not to have their names on the patch.

Ok, less US focused but still Western-centered on Greek mythos and achievement. He’s grasping at anything that will walk him back but prove him right, at the same time.

But since we’re all “out of Africa” anyway, how is it right that Whites were, and are, being removed from their ancient and ancestral African homelands?

***note to spergatrons: out of Africa is their rhetoric and I’m using it rhetorically, no need to jump in and correct me for believing in OOA

Blogger The Cooler July 23, 2019 11:07 AM  

best gif evar, ya'll: https://proxy.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fmedia.giphy.com%2Fmedia%2F3rgXBFFa1uk6ChdJVm%2Fgiphy.gif&f=1

Blogger sammibandit July 23, 2019 11:24 AM  

English language
Most of America shown on the patch
National bird (eagle/adler symbolism is not universal)
I can't tell what kind of branch the eagle carries so I can't comment

You have to be blind to assert what he does. But he also probably thinks wearing epaulets means you're enlisted.

Blogger Watchu talkin bout Willis July 23, 2019 11:29 AM  

If this was an achievement of the human species, then it goes to show that because Wernher von Braun was a human but also a Nazi, the Apollo 11 moon landing was also a Nazi achievement. And no coincidence the presence of a Nazi base on the moon.

Blogger Arthur Isaac July 23, 2019 11:36 AM  

Eddie Murphy with fat or Idi Amin with hair?

Blogger Jed Mask July 23, 2019 11:42 AM  

Y'all be hatin' while yo' "enemies" be celebratin'!

Be BLESSED!

~ Bro. Jed

Blogger [Redacted] July 23, 2019 11:48 AM  

Black Magic Science Man is a parody that distorts science into soothsaying and religious homily. Reading meaning from government paraphernalia is a good direction to go into though, and maybe he will do the US dollar next.

Blogger Damelon Brinn July 23, 2019 11:51 AM  

Didn't a few women MeToo Tyson? Whatever happened wid dat?

He black. And unlike Cosby, he's a good leftist who never contradicts the narrative. That's what happened to it.

Blogger Eincrou July 23, 2019 11:56 AM  

Even if we ignore the rest of the aspects of the mission, like putting the American flag on the surface, the patch has a giant bald eagle, the National Animal of the United States of America, flying on the moon. Vacuum be damned, this is America!

To be sure, there were high minded, "For All Mankind," aspects to the mission, but let's not be stupid about this and pretend the mission had nothing that boldly claimed it to be an American achievement. The plaque they put on the surface had four signatures, Armstrong's, Aldrin's, Collins' and another man's who wasn't even there but received recognition anyways: US President Richard Nixon.

UN Secretary-General at the time, U Thant, was not asked to contribute his signature, to represent all the nations of this Earth.

Mr. Tyson is omitting all of this, and more, to lie to his audience.

Blogger Argus Bacchus July 23, 2019 12:12 PM  

"Affirmation that walking on the Moon was an achievement of the human species, to be shared by all."

Ah yes, the second greatest achievement of the human species, in which all races contributed equally to the endeavor.

The first of those achievements, of course, was the development and use of metal tools...


@28 Mocheirge

Wypeepo always gotta bring a brotha down.

Blogger Warunicorn July 23, 2019 12:23 PM  

Not sure what scares me more: That Tyson is in a position of celebrity and influence, or the 62K likes he received.

Blogger Azure Amaranthine July 23, 2019 12:39 PM  

I still maintain that you're all reading it wrong-O! C'mon homies, obvously he-sayin' that issa 'chievmint t be shaired by all spesheez!

Blogger Fuzzums Wuzzums July 23, 2019 12:46 PM  

Neil deGrasse Tyson, the world's topmost affirmative action scientist. Show some respect.

Blogger VFM #407 July 23, 2019 12:49 PM  

https://knowyourmeme.com/photos/732409-neil-degrasse-tyson

Blogger Snidely Whiplash July 23, 2019 12:56 PM  

Magic Science Man follows up with a typical blacksplained “my bad” and says the Apollo XIII badge says “humanity” better...it’s a metaphorical rendering of Apollo’s race to pull the sun across the sky. It reads “from the moon, knowledge”

Apollo 13 was notoriously a colossal, almost complete, failure from which the astronauts barely escaped with their lives.

Blogger MJ Meyers July 23, 2019 1:02 PM  

Is he implying that the Eagle has become a symbol of the human species instead of America? Or is he implying that America is empire of the world and, thus, the so-called "landing" represents humanity?

Blogger chronoblip July 23, 2019 1:38 PM  

"We never landed on the moon" is as rhetorically effective as "Democrats are the real racists".

Blogger Dave W. July 23, 2019 1:49 PM  

Nahhhh, Eddie Murphy used to actually be funny.

Blogger Mr. Roshi July 23, 2019 2:04 PM  

i get what you're saying eddie...SPACE EAGLES!!! And they're stealing our laurels?!
now i know why we haven't been back to the moon, damned antigravity birds of prey.

thanks eddie, you're my number one favorite science bitch.

Blogger Vendas July 23, 2019 2:16 PM  

The American Bald Eagle is the symbol of all mankind since 1776.

Blogger Mystic On Main July 23, 2019 2:51 PM  

Despite the eagle thing, NDT is one of those guys who serves the important role of popularizing science. It's not a bad gig for an astrophysicist. And the impact is huge.

Blogger Patrick Kelly July 23, 2019 2:54 PM  

Hah, I knew it, Americans did not go to the moon!!

Blogger Sterling Pilgrim July 23, 2019 3:02 PM  

This is the guy who called Christopher Columbus a “dick” because he convinced the leader of a tribe to give his ship’s men food for the voyage home. According to Tyson, the tribe didn’t have any to spare and were gonna all die in the winter.
How did Columbus save his men’s lives? By predicting the next lunar eclipse (using science) and scaring the bejeebus out of the tribal leader.


Most sensible people would just hail Columbus’s clever loyalty to his men as a leader, but not Tyson, oh no those poor savages got swindled by oppressive use of lunar phases.

Blogger Mystic On Main July 23, 2019 3:04 PM  

"Apollo 13 was notoriously a colossal, almost complete, failure from which the astronauts barely escaped with their lives."

True. Still, what a story of ingenuity, collaborative engineering and bravery.

Blogger Noah B. July 23, 2019 3:15 PM  

According to Tyson, the tribe didn’t have any to spare and were gonna all die in the winter.

That would be one of those notoriously harsh Caribbean winters when the buffaloes is all gone.

Blogger Tom Rogers July 23, 2019 3:23 PM  

On the basis of that emblem, wasn't Apollo 11 in fact an achievement of bald eagles? After all, that's what it shows on the patch. Isn't Tyson being a bit speciesist here? Why are you so bigoted against eagles, Mister Tyson? Here you are appropriating the achievements of eagles. Tut, tut. Is this out of jealously?

Blogger ar10308 July 23, 2019 4:13 PM  

@69 ""We never landed on the moon" is as rhetorically effective as "Democrats are the real racists"."

All Moon Landing deniers base their arguments on Rhetoric. They vocalize on very minute details and verbal flubs to people who don't know much about the technical aspects and then extrapolate to mean the entire thing is a complete lie.

Granted, I agree that we probably weren't told everything that happened up there, but we have hours of footage of astronauts doing various tasks on the Moon, that would have been impossible to fake.

Blogger Mystic On Main July 23, 2019 4:30 PM  

"All Moon Landing deniers base their arguments on Rhetoric. They vocalize on very minute details and verbal flubs to people who don't know much about the technical aspects and then extrapolate to mean the entire thing is a complete lie."

Are there really any more people who dispute the moon landings??

Blogger Damelon Brinn July 23, 2019 4:39 PM  

"We never landed on the moon" is as rhetorically effective as

That depends on what effect is intended. Whenever I bring it up, it has exactly the effect I intend.

Blogger chronoblip July 23, 2019 4:52 PM  

There are dialectic arguments for and against the legitimacy of the moon landings. It wouldn't be impossible to fake.

That's irrelevant though, there are SJWs and the like who want to claim the accomplishments for themselves, regardless of what really happened, which is why they also try to claim Thor, Iron Man, and Luke Skywalker. The reality doesn't matter.

Trump's Space Force is an "agree and amplify" for the myth of the moon landings, so that regardless of what really did happen, he's setting the sights even higher now, and folks trying to claim past victories look petty in comparison.

Bickering about the truth of the moon landings is like arguing what shade of blue Paul Bunyan's Ox really was, while the SJWs are trying to make him into a transgender practitioner of bestiality.

Blogger Up from the pond July 23, 2019 5:51 PM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger Up from the pond July 23, 2019 5:54 PM  

Don't show Neil this Nebula Award-nominated short film. He will think it's real.

THE OLD NEGRO SPACE PROGRAM
https://www.bitchute.com/video/AMO6T6DKyULE/

Here is the Infogalactic article on this film
https://infogalactic.com/info/The_Old_Negro_Space_Program

Blogger Paulito July 23, 2019 6:40 PM  

@79 Exactly. That's the same way we know Batman's a real person. Hours and hours of footage.

Blogger BalancedTryteOperators July 23, 2019 7:31 PM  

That people like Neil DeGrasse Tyson exist scares me. Why? That someone spent 42 years as an adult, told and knowing that the Bald Eagle is the national bird--who is literally reminded of that fact every single time they see the tails of a quarter or watch a movie set in Washington D.C.--can't put together that the bird in a national symbol in an unfamiliar context--again despite 42 years of repetition and exposure--tells me that it is possible to be born with a mind that can't analyze.

Do these people have the right to complain that fundamentalist Christians are dumb? Fundies reason very poorly, that is true, but at least they can reason at all. They can look at an unfamiliar context and analyze it correctly...eventually. It certainly wouldn't take them 42 years. People like Neil DeGrasse Tyson can't do that in 42 years of free time.

Blogger Snidely Whiplash July 23, 2019 8:10 PM  

BalancedTryteOperators wrote:Fundies reason very poorly, that is true,
This is a (((lie))).

Blogger Brian Peterson July 23, 2019 8:34 PM  

Holy hell someone needs to make a comedy of an all-woman task force commissioned to get “mankind” to the moon. The jokes are positively endless.

“Well Mr President... we were a full go but it appears all of their periods have synced up with the launch date and half of them think the Van Allen Belt is an accessory made by Kate Spade...”

Blogger Mystic On Main July 23, 2019 9:41 PM  

"Do these people have the right to complain that fundamentalist Christians are dumb? Fundies reason very poorly, that is true, but at least they can reason at all. They can look at an unfamiliar context and analyze it correctly...eventually. It certainly wouldn't take them 42 years. People like Neil DeGrasse Tyson can't do that in 42 years of free time."

He's an astrophysicist. He can reason. He can probably reason you into the ground. And there is nothing about "fundies" that suggest they reason poorly as a group.

Blogger Damelon Brinn July 23, 2019 10:08 PM  

Holy hell someone needs to make a comedy of an all-woman task force commissioned to get “mankind” to the moon.

They already had to cancel the first all-girl spacewalk. I forget what the official reason was. Oh, something to do with the bad men at NASA not making sure there was a spacesuit in her size, I think. At this point, I figure the first woman on the Moon, if there ever is one, will probably be a man in drag.

Blogger bodenlose Schweinerei July 23, 2019 10:16 PM  

@88- Period sync would like be one of the smaller problems:

"Nkoloso stated the program failed due to the pregnancy of astronaut Matha Mwambwa and her subsequently leaving the program to return to her parents"

Edward Makuka Nkoloso

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Blogger Amy July 24, 2019 6:41 AM  

“Edward Makuka Nkoloso”

You can’t make this stuff up...? In every SJWs rape fantasies of ebil wypipo is their vision of Whites claiming blacks are not equal. Then you read this guy’s bio, and know you don’t have to make it up, or backup the story.

Blogger CF Neal July 24, 2019 11:56 PM  

IMHO, popularizing a version of science falsely so called is doing a disservice to all mankind.

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