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Monday, September 25, 2006

Short-lived secularism

Trey Parker and Matt Stone have the answer to shutting it down once and for all:

"That's where we kind of agree with some of the people who've criticized our show," Stone says. "Because it really is open season on Jesus. We can do whatever we want to Jesus, and we have. We've had him say bad words. We've had him shoot a gun. We've had him kill people. We can do whatever we want. But Mohammed, we couldn't just show a simple image."

During the part of the show where Mohammed was to be depicted — benignly, Stone and Parker say — the show ran a black screen that read: "Comedy Central has refused to broadcast an image of Mohammed on their network."

Other networks took a similar course, refusing to air images of Mohammed — even when reporting on the Denmark cartoon riots — claiming they were refraining because they're religiously tolerant, the South Park creators say.

"No you're not," Stone retorts. "You're afraid of getting blown up. That's what you're afraid of. Comedy Central copped to that, you know: 'We're afraid of getting blown up.'"

It's a pretty simple blueprint for those scary right-wing Christians who are so actively attempting to establish a theocracy. If someone takes the name of your Lord and Savior in vain, then kill him on the spot. If a television show is insufficiently respectful towards the Alpha and Omega, don't boycott, simply bomb.

Atheists, secularists and "brights" (who is the marketing genius who thought that one up?) only believe they have this one life to live, so they're reasonably inclined towards cowardice in the interest of preserving it. A single churchload of committed theocrats could probably have an American theocracy up-and-running in time for Christmas.

Scoff and pain shall be given unto you
Jeer and ye shall die
Mock and bombs shall be exploded next to you
Hallelu, Hallelujah!

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