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Sunday, January 24, 2016

Championship Weekend

I'm going to go with the conspiracy theorists. New England over Denver, because Brady is the better representative of the Old School NFL. Carolina over Arizona, because Cam Newton is a better representative of the New School NFL.

Then New School NFL over Old School NFL for the 50th Anniversary Super Bowl, thereby symbolically denoting the transformation of America into the New America. Predictive programming calls for Carolina.

One could, of course, reach the same conclusion simply by comparing teams, but it's more fun to prognosticate The Game of Pigskins via the NFL Narrative.

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240 Comments:

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Blogger James Dixon January 24, 2016 11:32 AM  

That would be Carolina over Arizona. :)

Anonymous Leatherwing January 24, 2016 11:36 AM  

God, I hope you're wrong. They won't be able to make a helmet large enough for Cam Newton's head if he wins the Super Bowl.

Blogger Hostem Populi January 24, 2016 12:02 PM  

Carolina winning the Super Bowl would be a fair consolation prize for Clemson not beating Alabama. In fact, if its a New England v Carolina match-up, I'll be happy with either outcome, as watching that cuck Roger Goodell hand Brady the Lombardi Trophy would give Super Bowl 50 the best ending ever.

Blogger Cecil Henry January 24, 2016 12:30 PM  

For me, New England vs Denver will be the Real Superbowl.

Everything else is a detail.

Blogger Daniel January 24, 2016 12:34 PM  

You are missing the potential Bob Griese-Fran Tarkenton narrative.

Blogger pyrrhus January 24, 2016 12:41 PM  

Arizona all the way...

Anonymous NateM January 24, 2016 12:41 PM  

@2 According to a buddy who lives in Charlotte, Cam has actually calmed down a lot, and is a LOT more humble than he once was. Apparently he learned his lesson after all the troubles he had in college. The community there loves the guy. I have to admit he got lucky in finding a franchise where he could be successful personally and professionally. I'd rather see him (and Carolina, a franchise that has had serious failings) win it any day over Brady or Peyton, two of the biggest headed wankers in the game.

Blogger VD January 24, 2016 12:45 PM  

The alternative narrative, of course, is that the league wants to send off Brady & Belichick as THE GREATEST COACH-QB PAIRING OF ALL TIME for the 50th Anniversary. But if Goodell's little tiff with Brady is genuine - and that could be part of the narrative - that would make it seem unlikely.

Blogger Aziz P. January 24, 2016 12:58 PM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger Aziz P. January 24, 2016 12:59 PM  

@4 I'm with you, though possibly for different reasons: I dont have much stake in AZ or carolina. But I kind of hate the Broncos and Patriots equally.

(deleted prev comment bec I wasnt paying attention, used a # instead of @)

Blogger Cinco January 24, 2016 1:00 PM  

I don't know that a healthy New England is beatable this year. Now that Brady has all his weapons back. If Brady was a dick I would be rooting against him; however, Brady is nothing but class and watching him win is a kind of an honor.

Anonymous WillBest January 24, 2016 1:03 PM  

Big Ben with a broken arm, no Antonio Brown, and no secondary almost beat the Broncos at Mile High. This shouldn't even be an interesting game.

I think the NFCC however will be one of the best games this year, and I am predicting the NFCC winner to handle the Patriots in the SB but it should be a solid game either way.

What I would love to happen is for Brady to retire if he wins this Super Bowl. Best to go out 1 year early than 1 year too late. I don't want to watch him end up a shell of himself, and getting benched like Manning desperately trying for that 1 last elusive SB.

Anonymous Joe January 24, 2016 1:05 PM  

I wanna kiss Suzie

Blogger Ceasar January 24, 2016 1:09 PM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger Ceasar January 24, 2016 1:11 PM  

Payton cannot throw passes longer than 10 yards. Expect to see Belichick focus on putting Payton on his back early. Patriots by 4. Two things make me think Arizona will win big over Carolina tonight, 1) Carolina losing starting 2nd CB and Nickel and 2) Cam's insistence on using truffle butter as skin moisturizer. Dude is a drama queen and will "Cam it" in the end. 2 picks. Cards by 10.

Blogger YIH January 24, 2016 1:17 PM  

I think the Broncos could pull it off.
The Patriots biggest weakness (OL) is the one thing the Broncos have been able to exploit.
They could win in spite of, not because of, Manning.
Everyone (except perhaps him) knows this is Manning's last shot.
If they blow it like they did in SB 48, all bets are off however.

Anonymous zen0 the Ephemeral January 24, 2016 1:50 PM  

The NFL has become a soap opera.

Blogger YIH January 24, 2016 1:52 PM  

Believe it or not, I don't think weather will be much of a factor in the NFC game.
First. the Cards did not have any travel problems.
Second, the current weather in Phoenix, AZ is clear, no wind and 63 (17C). In Charlotte NC is 47 (8C) clear, light breeze.

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 2:01 PM  

Here is the other conspiracy theory. Which could have Manning facing off against his former coaches Bruce Arians and Tom Moore if Zona can take down Cam and the Panthers. Looks like a win win either way for the NFL story line if either of these holds up.

http://nypost.com/2016/01/21/the-nfl-conspiracy-theory-freaking-out-patriots-fans/

Blogger YIH January 24, 2016 2:05 PM  

@17. zen0:
I don't blame you for thinking that. Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't think the NFL has become ''sports entertainment'' in the way the Harlem Globetrotters or pro wrestling is.

Blogger Billy January 24, 2016 2:29 PM  

Edleman is indefensible in the short pass. I see the Patriots winning. Carolina QB is such a ego driven dickhead, I hoping for an Arizona win. Although I believe Carolina will pull it out. Carolina other than QB has some solid players of character worth rooting for. Greg Olson, Luke Kuechley to name a few. Arizona has Carson Palmer that's about it.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 2:31 PM  

except that Carolina isn't new school. Its as old school as it comes.

Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother January 24, 2016 2:32 PM  

Patriots FTW

Blogger Humpty Dumpty #4464 January 24, 2016 2:33 PM  

@2, wait a minute...are you saying that NFL QBs have massive egos? That's it, I'm not watching this crap anymore.

Blogger Guitar Man January 24, 2016 2:42 PM  

Go Pats!

OpenID Jack Amok January 24, 2016 2:42 PM  

except that Carolina isn't new school. Its as old school as it comes.

Nobody with LBs like Kuechly and Davis is new school. But I expect the Birds to win.

Can't tell with NE and Den. NE is better overall, but like YIH mentioned, their biggest weakness is on Denver could exploit. Whether they will or not, I can't say. Bellichek is very good at identifying a way to attack the other team that minimizes his own weakness.

Blogger Billy January 24, 2016 2:42 PM  

@24 naw, I'm saying he's the only one who runs around like an idiot dancing a jig, when he throws a TD pass when his team is down 28 in the 4th. You'd think he just won the SB.

Anonymous wEz January 24, 2016 3:04 PM  

NE beats Carolina in the superbowl. Belichick is still a mastermind with Brady at qb, and Cam Newton is still a volatile young black qb who is streaky and will have to handle the pressure in the big game.

Anonymous SugarPi January 24, 2016 3:20 PM  

I quit watching the Panthers for a while bc I couldn't stand CN. But I enjoy his entertaining behavior now and his attention to the kids in the front row is charming. If he'd just support his own kid by marrying the long-time-girlfriend-mother... probably too much to expect.

Anonymous Leatherwing January 24, 2016 3:22 PM  

@24 I'm saying Cam Newton has the maturity level of a middle schools kid. H be is very talented, but pouts when things don't go his way. You haven't seen it much this season since they've had a great season. But I have never seen him studying film on the sidelines. He either sits and sulks or celebrates. He isn't a student of the game, just a very strong, talented player. When he loses that strength or injury damages his talent, he will be done.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 3:23 PM  

Brady is a faggot. Everyone who ever wanted New England to win anything is a faggot. In fact everyone who ever, even for split second, so much as though "their uniforms aren't completely awful" is a faggot.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 3:24 PM  

"I'm saying Cam Newton has the maturity level of a middle schools kid. H be is very talented, but pouts when things don't go his way."

That is exactly correct.

Cam is ultimately dumb as a box of rocks.

Blogger DaveofSpades January 24, 2016 3:38 PM  

Nope. It's Payton's Last Ride if the storyline theory is correct.

Blogger Cinco January 24, 2016 3:48 PM  

Kickers... I swear. No one has just one job that essentially involves just one task and fucks it up more.

Blogger Humpty Dumpty #4464 January 24, 2016 3:50 PM  

Cam is ultimately dumb as a box of rocks.

Without a doubt, but I'm not sure he is any less humble than most QBs in the league.

Blogger Gapeseed January 24, 2016 3:51 PM  

Any story line that does not involve the Patriots hoisting another Super Bowl trophy is a win.

Anonymous Freestater January 24, 2016 3:55 PM  

Go pats! Suck it nate.

Blogger YIH January 24, 2016 3:56 PM  

@21 billy:
Carolina QB is such a ego driven dickhead
Yes he is. That's a job requirement for a pro football QB.

Anonymous WillBest January 24, 2016 3:57 PM  

Von Miller just added $1 million in guarantees to his contract.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 3:58 PM  

Great pick by that faggot Brady

Anonymous VFM #6306 January 24, 2016 4:04 PM  

He tried to throw one earlier too.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 4:10 PM  

Wow, no wonder the Den D is #1, they're looking monstrous today.

Blogger sillerjf January 24, 2016 4:12 PM  

Go Pats!

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 4:12 PM  

Hey Nate, faggots can run, who knew?...

Anonymous David Of One January 24, 2016 4:14 PM  

Sacks don't run.

Blogger YIH January 24, 2016 4:16 PM  

@44 patrick kelly:
Hey Nate, faggots can run, who knew?...
Of course he knows that. The tide have always been a great running team.
Even when they were White.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 4:17 PM  

As a long time, die-hard fan of Da'Raiders, I should hate both these teams, but I have to pick one to root for, kinda' lesser of evils situations, but I'd rather pick the greater evil.

So Brady and the Pats it is.

If it was any other D than Denv I'd take some consolation in the fact that Brady and the Pats have come back from bad 1/2 deficits before, not so sure I can count on that now, but it's still early and not too bad yet.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 4:21 PM  

Patsy oline is getting abused. Brady can't beat you from his back

Anonymous NateM January 24, 2016 4:26 PM  

"Brady is a faggot. Everyone who ever wanted New England to win anything is a faggot. In fact everyone who ever, even for split second, so much as though "their uniforms aren't completely awful" is a faggot."

"Great pick by that faggot Brady"

Nate is probably drunk, but i'm liking it. Honestly i'd tune in to watch him do color commentary for NFL

Blogger Dave January 24, 2016 4:26 PM  

2 picks & Brady ate a lot of turf after that throw.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 4:27 PM  

Damn, it's like Tom and Peyton swapped bodies or something. Where's the Manning interception machine I've grown to love and expect?

Blogger Tim January 24, 2016 4:28 PM  

Well, we still have a lot of football left, but Denver D is acting like they want it more than the New England O so far. Would like to see Peyton go out with a ring in his last year.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 4:28 PM  

Brady is such a bitch. I've always said all you have to do bis hit him a few times and he completely falls apart. Here is the proof.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 4:29 PM  

"Nate is probably drunk, but i'm liking it. Honestly i'd tune in to watch him do color commentary for NFL"

That's mostly why I'm here. I luv this blog.

Blogger Dave January 24, 2016 4:31 PM  

Never understood wasting a T/O on 2 and 21. What's another 5 yds at that point?

Anonymous G.Veil January 24, 2016 4:34 PM  

@Nate

Yeah, can't remember the Seahawks hitting Brady at all in that Superbowl, I mean they had no rush at all

Blogger Salt January 24, 2016 4:35 PM  

I'd prefer Denver, but if it'll make Nate's head explode -

GO PATS!

Blogger Billy January 24, 2016 4:35 PM  

Brady is under siege. Damn that fat jew Seth Rogan is fucking disgusting.

Anonymous Rolf January 24, 2016 4:36 PM  

Duh'hell's up with the Bud Lite commercial? It's the new beer for cross-dressers or something? If I were a beer drinker (I'm not), I'd change brands from it based on that. I realize they were trying to be funny, but, uh, no.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 4:37 PM  

That false start was actually the best play of the game so far fir the patsy o line

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 4:39 PM  

It pains me to admit it but this actually has nothing to do with manning and brady.. and everything to do with the trenches. Denver owing them

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 4:39 PM  

Peyton is throwing way better than last week though

Anonymous David Of One January 24, 2016 4:43 PM  

FLAG! Where's the flag?

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 4:43 PM  

Manning put two balls right in the right spot and the wrs let him down.

Anonymous VFM #6306 January 24, 2016 4:44 PM  

33 seconds. Watch Denver D and special teams chokeaway some points.

Blogger Russell Widhalm January 24, 2016 4:44 PM  

@29: the "long time GF" is a stripper. And she's just his beard, because Cam is gay.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 4:45 PM  

Yeah, the Den Dline is mauling the Pat Oline. Let's see if Belichek can pull out some of his famous 2nd half adjustment magic, but it better be good. Den is at their best, and the Pats not so much.

I thought the Pats were sandbagging the end of the season, but maybe they really were in bad shape. Most of their games they didn't have to be all they could be to win, everyone else was just worse.

Blogger Daniel January 24, 2016 4:45 PM  

Wow. Didn't think hoodie would quit.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 4:46 PM  

"And she's just his beard, because Cam is gay."

Its funny you say that... rumors were all over Auburn about that.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 4:48 PM  

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger Dave January 24, 2016 4:48 PM  

Jay Feely, from kicker to sideline reporter. That's gotta be a first.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 4:50 PM  

Pats o line has been destroyed by injuries. They have covered it up by brady making quick throws and smoke and mirrors. But that isn't gonna work against this front 7

Anonymous VFM #6306 January 24, 2016 4:57 PM  

Pats sucked and are down a TD. Denver played its best half yet and won't sustain. ADV: Patriots.

Anonymous VFM #6306 January 24, 2016 4:59 PM  

Downlow isn't the same as gay. I'd bet he was equal opp...but he doesn't have any babymommas?

That is a bit suspicious.

Blogger YIH January 24, 2016 5:01 PM  

@47. patrick kelly:
As a long time, die-hard fan of Da'Raiders
It's wierd, I don't hate the ??? Raiders, because I'm east coast.
Yes, I'm glad Tampa Bay beat (the homeless team that is currently in Oakland CA).
In fact, I feel sorry for the ??? Raiders, the next city they go to will probably not allow their fans to wear costumes.

Anonymous WillBest January 24, 2016 5:07 PM  

Well he is claiming the one born a month ago. So either its his, or his beard is a stone cold gold digger.

And if I were a football player I wouldn't give any woman state sanctioned marriage papers.

---

And Denver continues its trend of only playing one half.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 5:09 PM  

@75 YIH.

I don't hate either team, just wondered if I'm supposed too.

It all comes down to being a fan of good football, I don't care who's playing.

That SB loosing to TB (Chucky must die die died !!) and the 90' AFC championship loss to Buffalo were two of the hardest games for me to watch.

I'm old enough to have watched the Raiders dominate the AFL as a kid and we had a few dominant years from the 70's into the 80's. It all comes and goes.

I really hope they don't end up in San Antonio. How bout the Tijuana Raiders? Mexico needs some NFL luv.

OpenID Jack Amok January 24, 2016 5:11 PM  

Cam is ultimately dumb as a box of rocks

Wonderlic score of 21 - average for the general population, so he's roughly 100 IQ. NFL QB average is 24. I'm not positive what the STDEV for Wonderlic is, but I'm going to guess 5, since the average Engineer is close to +2 StDev and has Wonderlic of 29.

Some other QB wonderlic scores:

Aaron Rodgers 35
Tom Brady 33
Russell Wilson 28
Peyton Manning 28*
Carson Palmer 26
RG3 24



Blogger Cinco January 24, 2016 5:12 PM  

Tijuana Chupscabre?

Blogger YIH January 24, 2016 5:20 PM  

nfl.com is streaming the game.
And it sucks. Even Yahoo! did better. I'm serious.
The Conference Championships need to be streamed - and not blocked the radio calls.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 5:20 PM  

I was thinking Tijuana Vatos, but that works.

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 5:21 PM  

"Brady is such a bitch. I've always said all you have to do bis hit him a few times and he completely falls apart. Here is the proof."

He's definitely no Joe Montana...

Blogger YIH January 24, 2016 5:24 PM  

That ticks me off, I can't find a live radio stream for the game.
That sucks.

Anonymous WillBest January 24, 2016 5:28 PM  

He's definitely no Joe Montana...

Few quarterbacks are.

Blogger Gapeseed January 24, 2016 5:29 PM  

Von Miller is doing a credible impression of Lawrence Taylor.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 5:30 PM  

woo... this is a scary spot to be in for the New England Tacklin' Faggots

Anonymous VFM #6306 January 24, 2016 5:31 PM  

This is NEs game. Manning won't get rid of it and the run is nothing. If Defense can't force a score, the Model QB will see the plane break one way or another.

Carolina D should destroy either of these olines.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 5:31 PM  

"He's definitely no Joe Montana..."

You're right. He has 10 times the arm Joe had. He probably also gives better head than Joe did. You'd have to ask Gronk about that though.

Anonymous WaterBoy January 24, 2016 5:31 PM  

YIH @83:

Try here.

Anonymous WillBest January 24, 2016 5:34 PM  

Nate is going to need a second bottle of whisky for the NFCC, it seems like the one he started with is almost out.

Anonymous SugarPi January 24, 2016 5:36 PM  

@66 He impregnated up his beard? Now I'm wondering about Mohammed Kasim Reed.

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 5:37 PM  

"He has 10 times the arm Joe had."

Montana to Rice 60 yards in the air in stride ftw.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rtN9jVoJPuw

Anonymous NateM January 24, 2016 5:38 PM  

@78 Maybe Rodgers is just too smart for his own good. is such a thing as overthinking in that position. I would be curious to know what Joe Montana's is, since i've always heard he is just basically a rock with lips. But I guess where he lacked in knowledge of anything else, he filled it all with football

Anonymous NateM January 24, 2016 5:40 PM  

@88

Aaron Hernandez. he's the one who made Brady do it at Gunpoint

Anonymous SugarPi January 24, 2016 5:42 PM  

should have deleted "up"
@78 I'm not surprised Rodgers scores well. He beat astronaut Kelly on Jeopardy.

Blogger Gapeseed January 24, 2016 5:46 PM  

He has 10 times the arm Joe had.

If Montana were really the noodle arm Nate says, NFL defenses would have crowded the line and dared Montana to beat them deep. Montana would have failed, and the Niners dynasty would have been stillborn. Give the devil his due, Nate. Montana was awesome, particularly in Bill Walsh's system.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 5:47 PM  

Those diet DP adds are gay, diet soft drinks are not healthy, they taste like crap, and don't help anyone lose weight.

Even Bud Light is better for you.

Blogger YIH January 24, 2016 5:48 PM  

I warned you. Yes I did.
I week ago my 'spidey sense' told me, ''this is how Manning will be told it's over''.
And the Broncos are going to get him to the end of his story.

Anonymous WillBest January 24, 2016 5:50 PM  

Even Bud Light is better for you.

It was until it simultaneously subjected me to Schumer and Rogan at the same time. Nobody deserves that. Not even Muslims.

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 5:54 PM  

@78

Ryan Fitzpatrick scored a 48 on the wonderlic and took the test in a record 9 minutes time.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 5:56 PM  

Didn't mean the commercial was better (yuck), but that's funny.

Any lil' faggot pops out like that and scares my kids should be shot with a pink Glock 9mm.

Anonymous WillBest January 24, 2016 6:02 PM  

Did not expect the Denver D to seriously step it up after last week. But 3 first downs and the game will be theirs.

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 6:07 PM  

@96

"Montana was awesome, particularly in Bill Walsh's system."


27 years ago today Joe Montana drove his team 92 yards in Super Bowl XXIII ftw. Along the way on the drive Montana saw (and talked about) John Candy in the stands to his celebrity starstruck right tackle Harris Barton. Before hitting John Taylor in stride for the winning touchdown with 35 seconds left. Joe Cool, there can only be one.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 6:16 PM  

I hate the New England Tacklin' Faggots more than most.. but that was NOT a fumble. He never had control of that ball.

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 6:20 PM  

@19

Gronk was held in the endzone by Talib. The fix is in. Put your money on Zona in the next one. Storyline.

http://nypost.com/2016/01/21/the-nfl-conspiracy-theory-freaking-out-patriots-fans/

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 6:20 PM  

"Gronk was held in the endzone by Talib. The fix is in."

***eye roll***

OpenID Jack Amok January 24, 2016 6:21 PM  

Denver just cannot burn clock when they need to.

Blogger YIH January 24, 2016 6:23 PM  

Did I warn you?
This is Brady's and Belicheat's last chance.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 6:23 PM  

"He never had control of that ball."

I thought he was down before it came out even if he did, but that's not how they saw it.

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 6:24 PM  

@106

C'mon man. Talib was all on Gronk's back coming into the endzone. Then Talib had his left arm wrapped around his waist and right arm on his should so Gronk couldn't jump for the ball. That was a mugging, even to a blind man.

Anonymous David Of One January 24, 2016 6:25 PM  

That was a big in your face foul!

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 6:26 PM  

Gotta luv that Brady to Gronk combo.

Anonymous David of One January 24, 2016 6:27 PM  

Oh O ...

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 6:30 PM  

"C'mon man. Talib was all on Gronk's back coming into the endzone. "

You're a fan boy and a faggot.

Anonymous David of One January 24, 2016 6:30 PM  

O CRAP!!!!

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 6:31 PM  

Wow

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 6:32 PM  

"You're a fan boy"

I can't stand the Patriots dick wart. You're the Peyton Manning ball washer.

Blogger Gapeseed January 24, 2016 6:32 PM  

Chicken parm you taste so good!

Blogger YIH January 24, 2016 6:32 PM  

Manning gets his last shot at the SB

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 6:33 PM  

Great game, the better team won, barely, I just hope they show up in this top form for the SB.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 6:33 PM  

BAHAHAHAHAH! YES!

EFFFFFF YOU NEW ENGLAND TACKLIN' FAGGOTS

Anonymous Dave Gerrold's Cabana Boy January 24, 2016 6:33 PM  

Sit the fuck down Cheatriots.

Blogger JDC January 24, 2016 6:34 PM  

Go home Brady

Anonymous Dave Gerrold's Cabana Boy January 24, 2016 6:35 PM  

The most beautiful sight in the world: Tom Brady getting his crank knocked in the dirt.

Blogger Cecil Henry January 24, 2016 6:35 PM  

Don't you wish a Superbowl was like that..

They rarely are. But Conference finals are always competitive and always contested.

That was the Superbowl.....

Blogger RobertT January 24, 2016 6:36 PM  

Broncs prevail.

Anonymous NateM January 24, 2016 6:37 PM  

with how badly they favor the Pats I expected Brady to pull out a handgun and go full Last Boyscout at the end. Then they would still flag Denver

Blogger David of One January 24, 2016 6:37 PM  

Oh yeah ... now to Super Bowl and then ... I still remember John Boy's 55-10 loss. Standing in the snow grilling steaks only to watch a rout!

Anonymous Dave Gerrold's Cabana Boy January 24, 2016 6:40 PM  

Love love love that shot of Prima Donna Brady sulking off to the locker room, complete with grass stains all over his jersey.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 6:41 PM  

"The most beautiful sight in the world: Tom Brady getting his crank knocked in the dirt."

I swear at one point they knocked his vagina right off.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 6:42 PM  

Why all the hate for Tom? Jealous he's prettier than you?

Anonymous rubberducky January 24, 2016 6:42 PM  

@103 that is a pretty cool story. But i gotta say, it was kind of hard to miss John Candy

Anonymous SugarPi January 24, 2016 6:45 PM  

Pats lose and Panthers win... I'm half there!

Anonymous Dave Gerrold's Cabana Boy January 24, 2016 6:47 PM  

"I swear at one point they knocked his vagina right off"

BWAHAHAHA *COUGH* BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 6:48 PM  

@132

"that is a pretty cool story. But i gotta say, it was kind of hard to miss John Candy"

True that. But spending 30 seconds talking about John Candy with 90 yards to go and needing a touchdown to win the Super Bowl shows nuts of steel.

Anonymous G.Veil January 24, 2016 6:49 PM  

Great game, on to the Superbowl, where Peyton can live comfortably in the knowledge it can't possibly get worse than 43-8

Anonymous zen0 the Ephemeral January 24, 2016 6:50 PM  

If Denver was not in fear of hitting Brady high and getting the mandatory flag, there would have been more sacks.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 6:54 PM  

I am not a carolina fan. And in fact I do NOT want Carolina to win it all... but I have no doubt that they are in fact the best the NFL and have been all year.

Anonymous BigGayKoranBurner January 24, 2016 6:55 PM  

I have heard several times that the NFL changed the rules so that blacks could be quarterbacks, but I never found out what the change was. I know for basketball they had to do away with the dribbling rules for blacks to play.

Tom Brady getting his crank knocked in the dirt."I swear at one point they knocked his vagina right off.

While the media was all worried about Brady's balls being low, they forgot he was playing against a team with 6 roid ragers.
http://espn.go.com/nfl/story/_/id/9364711/richard-sherman-seems-seattle-seahawks-ped-problem

Why all the hate for Tom? Jealous he's prettier than you?

The leftists hate him for being the best player of the ERA while being white. Six super bowls with a mostly white team. Seriously why cant the media lay off him like they did for the black player arrested for beating up a hooker?

Any lil' faggot pops out like that and scares my kids should be shot with a pink Glock 9mm.

I might have bought the mini glock bayonet that a boyfriend thought would be cool, but even I don't have a pink glock, I do know a STR8 grandmother female nurse that has a pink non glock gun for breast cancer awareness.

Anonymous Eduardo the Magnificent January 24, 2016 6:56 PM  

Brian Tuohy called it a month ago, that it would be Manning's last ride vs. Newton in the 'Bowl, with the evil old white man losing to the black QB, because diversity and privilege. Budweiser and BOA shit themselves with glee.

http://www.thefixisin.net/nfl2015.html

Anonymous VFM #6306 January 24, 2016 6:58 PM  

Denver should not have been trying to burn clock. They needed to get a first down. NEs timeouts were going to be irrelevant as long as Denver left them with more than 60 ticks.

It is like coaches would rather risk losing the game rather than show the media why their pet theories are stupid.

Denver did nothing but give NE the best chance to win on their final play calls. The 3rd down pass should have been called on first down.

Blogger Leatherwing January 24, 2016 7:08 PM  

Well,at least we know Arizona's punter can tackle.

Anonymous SugarPi January 24, 2016 7:10 PM  

Nate, my support of the Panthers is pure sentiment. Their training camp is in my hometown. I know the couple who bank roll the college where they train... and other such stuff.

Anonymous zen0 the Ephemeral January 24, 2016 7:10 PM  

Palmer has not improved any since last week.

Anonymous BGKB January 24, 2016 7:11 PM  

naw, I'm saying he's the only one who runs around like an idiot dancing a jig, when he throws a TD pass when his team is down 28 in the 4th. You'd think he just won the SB.

Could be worse do you remember the chimp out of Richard Sherman https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yjOkTib5eVQ

Everyone who ever wanted New England to win anything is a faggot. In fact everyone who ever, even for split second, so much as though "their uniforms aren't completely awful" is a faggot.

I wish someone told me that before.

Duh'hell's up with the Bud Lite commercial? It's the new beer for cross-dressers or something?

Maybe they want people to drink responsibly so you don't find yourself down by the railroad tracks with my ex

Blogger Billy January 24, 2016 7:12 PM  

"Then New School NFL over Old School NFL for the 50th Anniversary Super Bowl, thereby symbolically denoting the transformation of America into the New America." Predictive programming calls for Carolina." I think that's about as close to accurate as one could call it.

Blogger David of One January 24, 2016 7:27 PM  

It is just me, but I think this game has a feel of a college game.

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 7:27 PM  

Zona looks lethargic. They need to be on the same juice Josh Norman and Ted Ginn are on. Norman and Ginn's eyes are buggin like they just shot up 30 cc's of some good peruvian flake.

Blogger Quintus Maximus January 24, 2016 7:30 PM  

@141 Kubiak has the same nonsensical 'play not to lose' mentality that John Fox did. Annoys the hell out of me. Denver shouldn't have won that.

Blogger VD January 24, 2016 7:34 PM  

The difference between Cam and Vick... Cam can see more than one receiver. You can see Brown was his second option on that long TD.

Blogger Josh January 24, 2016 7:36 PM  

another big difference is Cam is 6'5" and 250--much easier to absorb hits

Anonymous Palmer Sucks Fan Club January 24, 2016 7:39 PM  

Palmer sucks

Blogger David of One January 24, 2016 7:39 PM  

Your right ... big difference. he can do some of his own hitting.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 7:46 PM  

'The difference between Cam and Vick... Cam can see more than one receiver. You can see Brown was his second option on that long TD.'

Couple other difference... Cam is taller... and bigger..and way harder to tackle... has a bigger arm.. and can read the whole field if he only has a few options.

Anonymous NateM January 24, 2016 7:47 PM  

@138

Nate,
Be honest you just don't like Carolina because they are basically the Second Chance Buckeyes, with a better QUarterback.

Anyways, all the criticism of Cam as a person I've heard comes from stuff he did back in college, seems he's grown up a lot since then and gotten his head screwed on right. Unless I haven't heard of something stupid he did recently

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 7:47 PM  

"Zona looks lethargic. "

Carolina has made a lot of teams look like that this year. They are just a better team than everyone else.

And when they beat denver... it won't have anything to do with a narative. They are just better.

Blogger Billy January 24, 2016 7:51 PM  

The new school NFL over the old school for the 50th SB. It will be symbolic of the transformation of America into the New America. A post-Christian, minority white hell hole.

Blogger allyn71 January 24, 2016 7:54 PM  

Looks like Davis broke his arm. That is going be a huge loss if so, both in this game and in two weeks. He and Kuechly together are unstoppable.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 7:58 PM  

I have to agree with Nate, Carolina at their best this year will beat Denver at their best, or NE if they had won.

The narrative conspiracy makes as much sense and any of them I've heard.

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 7:59 PM  

"Carolina has made a lot of teams look like that this year. They are just a better team than everyone else."

I think Zona is the best team in the NFL top to bottom. The loss of honey badger was a huge loss. But they still have the best team. And I think they will come back and beat Carolina in this one.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 8:03 PM  

"I think Zona is the best team in the NFL top to bottom."

Carson Palmer. Your argument is invalid.

Blogger David of One January 24, 2016 8:04 PM  

I think the Broncos and the Panthers would make for a good game.

Old and new is a definite aspect of such a match-up.

In that context, I recall hearing during the Denver/Green Bay game that Denver on average were the oldest and lightest of the entire NFL at that time. I also have a vague recollection that they were one of the fastest as well. One other fine point of that SB is that Denver was rotating their players almost every play near the end of the game. Green Bay was not. As a result, William "Refrigerator Perry" was totally worn out in the last minutes as the Broncos had to double team him ... all the while his coach never rotated him out or many of the other players at the end of the game. I suspect this was a crucial fine point as to why Green Bay lost.

Blogger Josh January 24, 2016 8:07 PM  

Carson Palmer. Your argument is invalid.

He's been a top 5 qb this year

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 8:08 PM  

people saying it is Old and New obviously haven't watched Carolina play. They are the steelers or the Titans from the glory days. They play great D and don't beat themselves.

They don't run some bullshit high speed offense like that homo chip kelly.

This is old school vs old school.

Blogger Leatherwing January 24, 2016 8:12 PM  

@NateM-154 My dislike for Newton has nothing to do with college, I'd never heard of him until he became the Panther QB. His celebrations don't seem as obnoxious this season, but he celebrates personal achievements when the team is losing badly (like celebrating first down runs).

I know other QBs will give a quick ”first down" signal, but watch Newton. He will run out into open space (so he's on camera) and do a little dance. When they are losing, he sits in the bench and sulks. He isn't someone that I would want as a leader.

And I live in NC. Not everyone here loves him, not by a long shot.

Anonymous SugarPi January 24, 2016 8:13 PM  

Well, if the SB is rigged and the Broncos win bc it's Peyton's last year, we'll have to hear about white privilege in football. Lots to consider here. DHS and NFL are BFFs.

Blogger Josh January 24, 2016 8:13 PM  

He isn't someone that I would want as a leader.

What's Carolina's record this year?

Blogger Raggededge January 24, 2016 8:16 PM  

Geez Leatherwing, did you read the article that Vox linked too where Cam broke down the Carolina huddle? He's the leader of that team, no doubt about it.

Anonymous NateM January 24, 2016 8:17 PM  

@164

Perhaps true, I haven't seen that all that prominently from Cam at least this season. I think he has grown up a great deal even since the pros, and especially since college.

But aren't Manning and Brady just as big of babies and sulks when losing and self aggrandizing when winning? Absolutely they are. They just do it in a different way.

Blogger JaimeInTexas January 24, 2016 8:17 PM  

In Houston, it is well known.

Blogger Leatherwing January 24, 2016 8:17 PM  

@166 Carolina have a great record this year. That is a team record.

Blogger Hostem Populi January 24, 2016 8:18 PM  

I just hope the Bizzaro Panthers don't show up for the second half.

Blogger David of One January 24, 2016 8:18 PM  

It would be wrong to characterize either Carolina or Arizona as new teams, 1995 and 1988 respectively. Denver on the other-hand was "founded" in 1959.

Blogger Hostem Populi January 24, 2016 8:19 PM  

Speaking of which... Near Pick 6...

Blogger Hostem Populi January 24, 2016 8:20 PM  

Carson Palmer. LOL.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 8:20 PM  

Yikes, this game is ugly.

Blogger David of One January 24, 2016 8:22 PM  

The Bears and Packers ... 1919. Kinda makes the discussion irrelevant.

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 8:24 PM  

"Carson Palmer. Your argument is invalid."

Hard to argue against the now after watching his last two plays here. Palmer needs to get his head out of his ass. And Arians should have went back to what was working for them, the rookie rb.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 8:26 PM  

Nate gets drunk faster than I can open a bottle.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 8:27 PM  

Remember.... palmer is the coward that cried that a qb was gonna die on the field if the nfl dint protect them

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 8:28 PM  

The amazing this is... this is stone cold sober. You should see drunk nate when the tackling faggot lose...

Blogger VD January 24, 2016 8:29 PM  

people saying it is Old and New obviously haven't watched Carolina play.

That has nothing to do with it. It is Quarterback as Symbol.

Anonymous SugarPi January 24, 2016 8:30 PM  

@171 yes, they've taken the foot off the gas in the second half and nearly lost the game. If they do that tonite, we'll know something's up. Coach is responsible for easing up (according to players in interviews).

Oh puleeze... now we hear the commentators slobber over the Panthers. These are the same ones who dissed Carolina when they, along with other teams, were 4-0. Media whores!

Blogger Desiderius January 24, 2016 8:33 PM  

"palmer is the coward"

He's also a quitter who fouled up his career by "retiring" from the Bengals when they had the #4 pick (AJ Green - the ultimate Palmer target) on tap.

He's always been a high variance player. Lacks the savvy of the greats.

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 8:35 PM  

Ah come on Nate, don't ruin my cyber image of you. Wait till I can make an Ilk Moot.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 8:35 PM  

Yes! Because we have never had black qbs before! Right Russell wilson? Hey Warren moon! Take a bow! Steve McNair... you obviously never played in a super bowl!

Vox.


This is dumb.

There is no narative bowl

Blogger Desiderius January 24, 2016 8:36 PM  

"It is Quarterback as Symbol."

Of what?

Cam is Willie Mays/Joe Louis/Oscar Robertson

We've been there before.

Blogger Josh January 24, 2016 8:36 PM  

Yes! Because we have never had black qbs before! Right Russell wilson? Hey Warren moon! Take a bow! Steve McNair... you obviously never played in a super bowl!

Doug Williams, anyone?

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 8:39 PM  

"Remember.... palmer is the coward that cried that a qb was gonna die on the field if the nfl dint protect them"

Yeah that's pretty uncharacteristic of who he is on the field and how he plays the game. Palmer's one of the tougher sob's out there as far as qbs go. One wouldn't expect to hear something like that from him.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 8:39 PM  

80 year old billionaire owners don't give a damn about the narative. They want to make money.

Blogger Josh January 24, 2016 8:40 PM  

80 year old billionaire owners don't give a damn about the narative. They want to make money.

Hey man...some of them are 70 or 60...

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 8:44 PM  

"He's also a quitter who fouled up his career by "retiring" from the Bengals when they had the #4 pick (AJ Green - the ultimate Palmer target) on tap."

Nobody wants to play for Mike Brown, the cheap bastage. The Bengals rarely are able to keep their best players. Boomer left, Corey Dillon etc etc. It's nothing to do with Palmer. It's the norm when the owner is a noted cheapskate.

Blogger Hostem Populi January 24, 2016 8:45 PM  

If the NFL were sports entertainment the Jets would be relevant.

Anonymous SugarPi January 24, 2016 8:46 PM  

Gamblers want to make money, too. Lotta $$ rides on outcome.

Blogger David of One January 24, 2016 8:46 PM  

If they are born and bred Southerners the narrative might be very important. I'm guessing that Jerry Richardson fits that description. Kinda like a Mint Julep.

Anonymous Palmer Sucks in Playoffs January 24, 2016 8:53 PM  

He's been a top 5 qb this year

Regular season. Not Playoffs.

Blogger Nate January 24, 2016 8:55 PM  

"If the NFL were sports entertainment the Jets would be relevant."

Exactly. About once every 5 years we'd be watching the Steelers and Cowboys in the Super Bowl.

Anonymous Jabari January 24, 2016 8:55 PM  

Saw this coming the way the games went last week. We're (the cards) just totally outclassed. :(

Anonymous patrick kelly January 24, 2016 9:03 PM  

What an exceptional athelete Cam is. Gotta' give props where they're due.

OpenID sigbouncer January 24, 2016 9:03 PM  

"If the NFL were sports entertainment the Jets would be relevant."

Games like these can be fixed by buying off the center and one official. Even a kicker and one official. If the powers that be determine that they want the game to go one way or the other. It wouldn't take much to make it happen. Don't fool yourself.

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