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Wednesday, March 23, 2016

A world of niches

Mike Cernovich explains the true meaning of "be yourself":
People ask me why I do what I do on Twitter. The only reason my antics seem “off” is because you’re comparing me to others in my genre. You have a vision based on how I am supposed to act. That vision is based on how others act.

What good would it do me to act like everyone else?

But there is no one else like me online. I’m more than a troll. I combine a unique blend of mindset, masculinity and trolling with a nuanced discussion of sensitive issues.

If I played Mr. Reasonable, I’d be another fungible good. There are hundreds of other people saying the same stuff as everyone else. Why join a conversation only to be like everyone else?

If I played up the Mr. Self Help Guru game, I’d have to get Botox like Tony Robbins and pretend to like people in order to take their money. I’d rather call out assholes than kiss up to them for cash.

You gotta play your own game.

How can you find that game? As cliche as it sounds, you must first find yourself.
In like manner, I often have people telling me how much more effective I would be if I was more patient, less contemptuous, and played more nicely with others.

But that's not who I am. Just as Mike is a cheerful brawler who gets in people's faces, I am an arrogant, solitary creature of the night who silently broods about things and makes plans while other people are sleeping.

A study recently came out that said intelligent people are happier if they don't spend too much time with their friends. I think that's largely true. I am one of the happiest people I know, which is somewhat remarkable in light of how it's hard not to see violence, bloodshed, conflict, and war on almost every horizon. But I'm happy nevertheless because I only spend time with my favorite people and otherwise doing exactly what I want to be doing... for the most part. I rather like the niche in which I have found myself; dark lording suits me.

That being said, paperwork is the bane of my existence. You have no idea how much paperwork is involved in running the Evil Legion of Evil.

And from the Christian perspective, how can we serve God if we are trying to be someone else, and play someone else's role? Play your own game. Don't try to play someone else's, because it rings false, it won't suit you, and you will not play it well.

Labels:

97 Comments:

Blogger Josh March 23, 2016 5:08 PM  

Play your own game. Don't try to play someone else's, because it rings false, it won't suit you, and you will not play it well.

I think the reason people don't play their own game is because they're afraid people won't like them if they do.

And I think they are afraid people won't like "the real me" because they don't really like themselves.

Blogger Beau March 23, 2016 5:18 PM  

You have no idea how much paperwork is involved in running the Evil Legion of Evil.

Banal evil burns slowly.

OpenID aew51183 March 23, 2016 5:24 PM  

@1

Keep in mind some people's games just suck.
I'm sure the many dismissive liberal arts students who "played their own game" in underwater basket weaving programs are better off being pretenders, at least for the sake of their and their children's financial security.

Anonymous Cinco March 23, 2016 5:34 PM  

@ 1 Josh

I think the reason people don't play their own game is because they're afraid people won't like them if they do.

Generally true, but I think really it comes down to just being afraid to separate oneself from the herd, not that they don't like themselves. Most people really want other people to like them. Look at how much effort women put into choosing their shoes. Look how men all generally dress the same at the office. If we change the term gamma to "typical herd animal" it all of a sudden becomes really clear.

Blogger praetorian March 23, 2016 5:35 PM  

Yes. "Become who you are."

A logical extension of that is to not to be too hard on people who are not who we are, so long as they are pursuing the most excellent version of who they are. In "A Traditionalist Confronts Fascism" Evola makes the point that a (and I'm paraphrasing from very bad memory here) a craftsman who does his job well is a better man than a reluctant and skulking king. Not exactly deep philosophy, but somewhat surprising to hear from someone associated with an aristocratic outlook on life.

Game sites that aren't trying to sell snake oil might do well to focus on what making the best of your natural type would mean, working with your strengths and attenuating your weaknesses, rather than telling people to just act alpha and start slayin' pussy.

Blogger Josh March 23, 2016 5:36 PM  

Look how men all generally dress the same at the office.

Nothing wrong with only wearing white, gray, blue, or tan.

Anonymous VFM #6306 March 23, 2016 5:37 PM  

Violence, bloodshed and war on every horizon sounds like an awfully pretty sunrise.

Blogger Student in Blue March 23, 2016 5:38 PM  

@Josh
And I think they are afraid people won't like "the real me" because they don't really like themselves.

On some level, probably. That explanation doesn't cover the delusion that it's possible to make everyone you care about happy, as well as just an irrational fear of failure (of making people like you).

Blogger Student in Blue March 23, 2016 5:42 PM  

@Cinco
If we change the term gamma to "typical herd animal" it all of a sudden becomes really clear.

Gamma isn't a typical herd animal though, Delta is. Gamma is just like the rest of the herd except they keep nipping at the leader and think they deserve all the nice things.

Anonymous Steve March 23, 2016 5:44 PM  

Nothing wrong with only wearing white, gray, blue, or tan.

I've often looked at tartan suits with a wistful gleam in my eye.

But the wife says she won't put up with me dressing like a tin of shortbread.

Maybe if I become a stand up comic, or something.

Anonymous Scintan March 23, 2016 5:46 PM  

I think the reason people don't play their own game is because they're afraid people won't like them if they do.

Sad, isn't it?

Blogger Salt March 23, 2016 5:48 PM  

Scintan wrote:I think the reason people don't play their own game is because they're afraid people won't like them if they do.

Sad, isn't it?


Be a lawyer. Instant cover.

Blogger Zaklog the Great March 23, 2016 5:50 PM  

A question I've wondered about for some time: You place a high value on loyalty and fiercely stand by anyone you consider an ally. On the other hand, you do not hesitate to harshly criticize people even if, on many subjects, they would side with you.

What is the dividing line for you? What distinguishes an ally whom you defend in all circumstances from someone whom you have no problem exchanging fire with? Is it a particular issue that they have a different stance on? Is it a question of overall philosophy?

Just curious.

Blogger Josh March 23, 2016 5:53 PM  

I've often looked at tartan suits with a wistful gleam in my eye.

LBF?

Anonymous Stickwick March 23, 2016 5:53 PM  

Josh: I think the reason people don't play their own game is because they're afraid people won't like them if they do.

They're afraid it won't get them what they want, and, yes, most people want to be liked. It's the same reason people tell lies. Being yourself means you may have to give up some of your desires.

A study recently came out that said intelligent people are happier if they don't spend too much time with their friends.

I am very solitary for a woman. I like people and yearn for a rich social life, but the paradox is that I find interacting with people for more than about an hour a day to be draining. Maybe I need to give up on the idea that I can have any kind of meaningful social life and embrace solitude. Problem is, I can't call myself the Dark Lady of the Night, for obvious reasons -- ironically, it would sound like I'm having a lot more social interactions than the name is intended to convey.

Anonymous BGKB March 23, 2016 5:54 PM  

I think the reason people don't play their own game is because they're afraid people won't like them if they do.

You might as well be yourself since people think they will be able to change you. "I bet this Morgan Freeman movie will get him to ignore reality"

Look how men all generally dress the same at the office.

I have scrubs that can be spotted 300yards away.

Blogger Lovekraft March 23, 2016 5:59 PM  

Read about that study too, about how the more intelligent you are the more you prefer limited human interaction. No shit. The mass media and education system has dumbed down the average person and removed the ability and desire to engage in meaningful debate.

Blogger haus frau March 23, 2016 6:03 PM  

For what its worth Vox, having seen how you deal with trolls I would not catagorize you as at all impatient.

Anonymous Orville March 23, 2016 6:05 PM  

A double minded man is unstable in all his ways. Fear is what makes us conform.

Anonymous DT March 23, 2016 6:05 PM  

In like manner, I often have people telling me how much more effective I would be if I was more patient, less contemptuous, and played more nicely with others.

* Enter dungeon.
* See Vox on throne.
* See Vox drinking SJW blood from a SJW skull.
* See VFM surrounding throne gnawing on SJW bones.
* "Vox...you really need to learn to play nicely with others."

Blogger praetorian March 23, 2016 6:10 PM  

@Stickwick: http://www.quietrev.com/6-illustrations-that-show-what-its-like-in-an-introverts-head/

Blogger collisioncat67 March 23, 2016 6:14 PM  

I'm an introvert. As a youngster I used to think that was a short coming; a flaw. Society pounds home the message that solitary people are suspect, weird, perhaps depressed, and "antisocial". I bought into that crap and found myself wishing and longing to be the affable, back slapping, glad handing "people person" that society indicated was the ideal.

...Or to put it another way; the more friends you have crying at your funeral, the better a life you have lived.

Now I look back on that notion and bristle.

Blogger VD March 23, 2016 6:17 PM  

What is the dividing line for you? What distinguishes an ally whom you defend in all circumstances from someone whom you have no problem exchanging fire with? Is it a particular issue that they have a different stance on? Is it a question of overall philosophy?

Whether they attack me publicly or not. An ally never attacks you in public, but expresses differences of opinion and corrections in private. It's not a question of overall philosophy; I have serious differences of opinion with all of my major social media allies. But you will never see us attacking each other over things large or small and we do what we can to look out for one another.

Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother March 23, 2016 6:29 PM  

I think it's interesting how Grima sounds a lot like Gamma.

Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother March 23, 2016 6:31 PM  

I'm an introvert when I'm lifting. Nowhere else. I need to gather all my mental energy and focus to complete lifts and hit my PR's.

Anonymous Steve March 23, 2016 6:32 PM  

Josh - LBF?

No. Black Watch.

Blogger RobertT March 23, 2016 6:33 PM  

In like manner, I often have people telling me how much more effective I would be if I was more patient, less contemptuous, and played more nicely with others.

Maybe, but I wouldn't be reading your blog & buying your books. Generic, fungible, throw-away. Take your pick.

Blogger Sean March 23, 2016 6:41 PM  

"dark lording suits me." Awesome! How many people in the history of the world have ever uttered that phrase?

Blogger Rick March 23, 2016 6:45 PM  

How does one reconcile the "be yourself" mind set with the advice of Christ to imitate him.

This culture hardly needs more encouragement to embrace its neglected narcissism. "Born that way, bitches" and all that. It's everywhere and tiresome.

The message of the Gospel seems to be "be transformed" and not "you're fine as is."

I don't find this easy, either. But I know it's right.

Blogger VD March 23, 2016 6:46 PM  

How does one reconcile the "be yourself" mind set with the advice of Christ to imitate him.

By all means, imitate Jesus Christ. But don't imitate anyone else. That's religion. This is philosophy.

Blogger Ingot9455 March 23, 2016 6:49 PM  

An arrogant solitary creature of the night who cashes in on bright yellow Nespresso machines.

Blogger White Devil March 23, 2016 6:52 PM  

It's not a question of overall philosophy; I have serious differences of opinion with all of my major social media allies.

Effective use of Semicolons is a sign of true evil.

Blogger Badger Brigadon March 23, 2016 6:52 PM  

" I am one of the happiest people I know, which is somewhat remarkable in light of how it's hard not to see violence, bloodshed, conflict, and war on almost every horizon."

I am happy BECAUSE I see that on almost every Horizon.
Humans Thrive on hardship.

I was watching 'Constantine' and if Constantine himself were not so cool, I would have been totally rooting for Gabriel.

Anonymous Dave March 23, 2016 6:55 PM  

@Stickwick "Problem is, I can't call myself the Dark Lady of the Night, for obvious reasons --ironically, it would sound like I'm having a lot more social interactions than the name is intended to convey."

That made me chuckle. I'm positive the Dread Ilk, VFM, & Ilk will find you a suitable moniker.

Blogger Escoffier March 23, 2016 6:56 PM  

I found for myself that attaining mastery of a tangible skill was critical for my formation as a man.

Anonymous Cinco March 23, 2016 6:56 PM  

VD, I have an off topic question for you. Coffee, energy drinks or other?

Anonymous Jill March 23, 2016 6:56 PM  

The problem with spending time with people is that they are so easily overwhelming. I can't accomplish what I need to if I'm being overwhelmed by others. And accomplishing goals is all that really matters. Do or do not, there is no try. Thanks, Yoda.

Blogger Badger Brigadon March 23, 2016 6:57 PM  

@25 ST8/Animal Mother-

Not me, I REQUIRE someone yelling at me, calling me a fatass, or saying 'you can do it' while I am lifting (preferably all three) or I rationalize laziness.

Blogger praetorian March 23, 2016 7:05 PM  

How does one reconcile the "be yourself" mind set with the advice of Christ to imitate him.

Infinities need to handled with care when discussing these things.

In the imperfect world, there is a tension between being inspired by someone or imitating good aspects of someone or learning from the effects of good aspects of someone and applying them within the context of your own life, and, in opposition, recognizing who *you* are and not trying to *be* them.

There are some truths about yourself that should be faced honestly and that are different than others: strengths and weaknesses, limitations and possibilities: taking an honest accounting of yourself as God made you and striving to perfect that (as much as is possible within your nature) is best.

Anonymous fred March 23, 2016 7:06 PM  

I saw that smart/friends study and laughed because my wife and I have commented on that many times over the years of our marriage - we move a lot and have the opportunity to make new friends all the time, but rarely do.

What we have found as 3 SD+ IQ couple : At this level, any 'friends' you are likely to make are only capable of one-way assistance - We can help them, but they can almost NEVER help us because they are barely capable of navigating modern life on their own.

My wife notes most women she knows are emotional garbage cans - they have all these emotional problems they love to 'discuss' but are completely uninterested in ACTUALLY CHANGING their lives in an attempt to solve their problems ... because well ... that's hard work.

The authors of the study did not seem to understand their own very well.

Friendships in order to be useful and fair have to be mutual and it is very rare for very smart people to find others at their intellectual and emotional levels. \

So why bother ?

Anonymous I Am Irony, Man March 23, 2016 7:12 PM  

From the linked article:

"As cliche as it sounds, you must first find yourself."

Erm...unless that "self" is a the "6-year-old girl" grown man linked to the other day.

Or any trans-[gender|race|other], either, for that matter.

Let's not get too carried away with the concept.

Blogger SQT March 23, 2016 7:21 PM  

I suspect that study is making introverts everywhere rejoice. I gave up worrying about having a lot of friends a long time ago- it's freaking exhausting.

Blogger Lazarus March 23, 2016 7:29 PM  

@ VD

And from the Christian perspective, how can we serve God if we are trying to be someone else, and play someone else's role? Play your own game. Don't try to play someone else's, because it rings false, it won't suit you, and you will not play it well.

A suitable Purim message. Well timed.

Off with the Masks!


Anonymous BGKB March 23, 2016 7:33 PM  

How does one reconcile the "be yourself" mind set with the advice of Christ to imitate him.

Remember he liked to flip tables & chase people around with a whip. In sword control zone he told people to trade their cloaks for swords.

Stickwick "Problem is, I can't call myself the Dark Lady of the Night, for obvious reasons --ironically, it would sound like I'm having a lot more

Someone never watched Elvira mistress of the dark. Perhaps Stickwick Mistress of Dark Matter/Entorpy?

'friends' you are likely to make are only capable of one-way assistance - We can help them, but they can almost NEVER help us

I have always told people they are better off alone than in a bad relationship. I don't have many examples of where I was helped by friends, other than moving furniture.

Blogger Hazim March 23, 2016 7:35 PM  

I find that wisdom and virtue are the harbingers of a decent friend, be they smart as Einstein or dumb as Gump. And virtue becomes rare among the higher IQs. I have friends in the 95 IQ range who sharpen my soul far more effectively than the ones in my range.

Blogger Rick March 23, 2016 7:44 PM  

Toward clarity: I think Christ's advice is to change ones actions, not personality.

Blogger Rusty Fife March 23, 2016 7:56 PM  

Steve wrote:I've often looked at tartan suits with a wistful gleam in my eye.

"Dress the Man" by Alan Flusser tells you how to wear them.

Blogger dc.sunsets March 23, 2016 7:58 PM  

I repeat, in my experience few people enjoy the company of those more than 1 SD away in IQ. Lots of people like the idea of being popular. They just don't understand that the idea is never more than an illusion. Look at all the celebrities who are miserable.

My sons were encouraged to find their niche and warned that it would not be heavily populated. It wasn't, but they didn't waste time and incur heartache trying to find the mythical realm of Popular Land.

I add that most people live their lives trapped in a little diorama that surrounds their head. To some extent we all do.

Anonymous Stickwick March 23, 2016 8:04 PM  

praetorian: @Stickwick: http://www.quietrev.com/6-illustrations-that-show-what-its-like-in-an-introverts-head/

Spot on.

Blogger VD March 23, 2016 8:05 PM  

Coffee, energy drinks or other?

Coffee. No question.

Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother March 23, 2016 8:07 PM  

I think you and I might be doing different kinds of lifting.

Blogger Rusty Fife March 23, 2016 8:11 PM  

Josh wrote:I've often looked at tartan suits with a wistful gleam in my eye.

LBF?


I go off to the interwebs to find the LBF pattern; instead I find this VERY disturbing one for the "Lady Boys of Bangkok":

http://www.tartans.scotland.net/tartan_info.cfm@tartan_id=7720.htm

Blogger Escoffier March 23, 2016 8:14 PM  

Rick wrote:How does one reconcile the "be yourself" mind set with the advice of Christ to imitate him.

This culture hardly needs more encouragement to embrace its neglected narcissism. "Born that way, bitches" and all that. It's everywhere and tiresome.

The message of the Gospel seems to be "be transformed" and not "you're fine as is."

I don't find this easy, either. But I know it's right.


The Chinese say that chicken stock makes all food taste more like itself. Following Christ and imitating him make us more ourselves.

Anonymous p-dawg March 23, 2016 8:27 PM  

A lot of people give this advice to "be yourself". But I'm an asshole. So it doesn't work out that well for me. I'm not saying it's bad advice, just be aware of yourself.

Anonymous Stickwick March 23, 2016 8:35 PM  

BGKB: Someone never watched Elvira mistress of the dark. Perhaps Stickwick Mistress of Dark Matter/Entorpy?

Stickwick, Mistress of the Dark (Matter). I like it!

Blogger Brian March 23, 2016 8:40 PM  

"I am one of the happiest people I know..."

It's said we should be as glad of our friends' happiness as our own.

Cheers!


"How does one reconcile the 'be yourself' mind set with the advice of Christ to imitate him."

It's the flip side of Mike and Vox's advice. I think it was von Balthasar who wrote that no man knows who he truly is until he discovers his divinely ordained mission.

Look at Abram/Abraham, Jacob/Israel, Simon/Peter and Saul/Paul. In Hebrew philosophy, a person's name is thought to express his essence. Each of these men received a new name from God along with their divine commissions.

Christ is the Man par excellence, which is why Pilate prophesies unknowing when he declares "Ecce homo".

What makes Jesus the perfect Man is his perfect obedience to the Father. That's how we are to imitate Him, each according to his gifts.

Anonymous Smith Ohlrig March 23, 2016 9:16 PM  

Who?


Mike C = meaningless

Blogger Snidely Whiplash March 23, 2016 9:23 PM  

Rick wrote:How does one reconcile the "be yourself" mind set with the advice of Christ to imitate him.



Not "be yourself". Become yourself. In Christ we find our highest and best self.

Blogger Snidely Whiplash March 23, 2016 9:26 PM  

Other people are wearying. I've always been happier without them around. Fortunately I grew up in the 60s in a large family, so no-one noticed.
Some small number of people are not, or are not very wearying. Those are the ones I seek out friendship with.

Blogger Tracy Coyle March 23, 2016 9:27 PM  

If we don't live the life we want, no one else can do it for us. The only game I play is the one where I set the rules...

Anonymous NateM March 23, 2016 9:41 PM  

"Dark Lording Suits"

Tailored in Italian Silk, Available in Black, Black and Black

Blogger LP9 Forever Solidified in Gold! Rin Integra S.I.G. March 23, 2016 9:41 PM  

Paperwork? Archives, files, outlets to monitor, business plans. I cannot imagine.

In Game theory, 'be yourself' is debated.

Post Americans are in a hypnotic state because they are given to stress as they refuse to unplug and walk away from failed matters. Their type casts personas are projected onto Mike C, they dont know how to interpret a Mike or a Vox or say a Finn or countless others who are not interested in idiocy.

They are simply their own men. Really some here or the VFM or Dreak ILK, Mike C, our host, etc., are mysteries to critics and nibshits.

In the strange err, dynamic world of women. LP Happiness is a clean orderly house, great meals, stocked household since shopping is misery unless its amazon, projects nearing completion, hobbies, etc. Boring stuff. Mind at peace with God, disregarding feelings and voiding out the boomer problems or wrong offline people.

What a week its been with the gym folk, the area I live in is a strange place, average age is 58 (boomerhumor).

Considering the full moons, the last five days served for great people watching.

I'm called aloof or keep an unpredictable schedule, not true, certain people have to be at the gym or where ever precisely at 8;45 am on a certain day, I dont do that. In response its said, "you were not shopping at your usual time, where were you?"

When pressed I reply with, "searching for my space ship."

Perhaps the labels are partially true because those who speak are not the kind of (type casted/locked into these habits they keep) people for me to commiserate/mesh with - those of a certain age here locally need to be with their own kind due to their generational quirks.

To be called aloof or I move too fast around the gym is code of the unthinking. The thinking person does not (often, I mean never reacts, doesn't care to fight) react but smiles and walks on. If God lets me be high energy I am thankful.

This is not boomer hatred at all. I'd hang out with Dad or Salt or other cool boomers as long as they are NOT from OH or around here.

I was given grocery assistance but returned the funds when the man said he requires me to play house with him on the weekend. I said no and chalk it up as some people being susceptible to the primary drama and moon cycles - there is nothing to take personal. He threw a fit when I returned his grocery cards. Again, nothing for me to react to because this person intents made clear after handing me a few grocery gift cards, its great I had the op to return them and walk away.

Blogger LP9 Forever Solidified in Gold! Rin Integra S.I.G. March 23, 2016 9:44 PM  

61 Too fun and true! Black 101, slight shimmer black and darker black 102.

Anonymous BGKB March 23, 2016 9:58 PM  

OT: One day after the Brussels chimp out and German leftists still don't know who to fight.
http://www.gaypatriot.net/2016/03/23/gay-left-hate-group-attacks-christian-easter-procession/

"The Christians in this video were having a peaceful procession through town as Easter approaches this weekend when a substantial group of radical LGBT thugs attacked them with paint bombs, destroying their crosses and shouting profanity.

It is good to know who the left view as a threat in Europe, even just one day after the horrible massacres in Brussels at the hands of Muslims. You've been put on notice Europe."

Blogger tz March 23, 2016 10:34 PM  

In like manner, I often have people telling me how much more effective I would be if I was more patient, less contemptuous, and played more nicely with others.

But that's not who I am. Just as Mike is a cheerful brawler who gets in people's faces, I am an arrogant, solitary creature of the night who silently broods about things and makes plans while other people are sleeping.


The problem is that while being yourself, you also, not unlike Midas, turn what you touch into an aspect of yourself, be it gold or lead.

Castalia House, and your other properties become an image of your good and bad aspects, your intelligence but also your arrogance.

That is the trade-off. Being prominent, you tend to be the personification of such, so polarize things to exclude a portion of a potential audience or to create one where one might not otherwise exist.

Scalzi has his sycophants, and you have your VFMs to provide one or five star ratings. But are any meaningful?

Apple was Steve Jobs. We see what it is fading to with Tim Cook.

Many don't personality-polarize. For bad or ill, seek either what is popular by surveys, or try to find the excellent. But the know not to be part of the equation themselves. But when you become part of the equation, much good will be rejected not on any merit but association, and similarly much bad will be accepted or overlooked. Such is human nature.

Blogger tz March 23, 2016 10:36 PM  

@54 - Scalzi is also apparently being himself.

Anonymous 5343 March 23, 2016 10:37 PM  

How does one reconcile the "be yourself" mind set with the advice of Christ to imitate him.

There's a difference between character and personality. Every Christian should have the same character: the character of Christ. In that sense we are to be imitators of him.

On the other hand, personalities are as wildly diverse as, well, Vox and Milo. I think that's what Vox and Mike mean when they talk about being true to yourself. Do the things you do well, the things consistent with your own personality, experience and skill set. Just make sure, if you're a Christian, to do them with godly character.

Blogger Lazarus March 23, 2016 10:44 PM  

LP9 Forever Solidified in Gold! Rin Integra S.I.G. wrote:In the strange err, dynamic world of women. LP Happiness is a clean orderly house, great meals, stocked household since shopping is misery unless its amazon, projects nearing completion, hobbies, etc. Boring stuff. Mind at peace with God, disregarding feelings and voiding out the boomer problems or wrong offline people.



Pleased to see things are working out. Hopes for continued success.

Anonymous Cassie March 23, 2016 10:45 PM  

Stickwick wrote:I am very solitary for a woman. I like people and yearn for a rich social life, but the paradox is that I find interacting with people for more than about an hour a day to be draining. Maybe I need to give up on the idea that I can have any kind of meaningful social life and embrace solitude.

Put the emphasis on "meaningful" as the definition of "rich" when it comes to social life. I'm also an introverted woman, and the key to a social life for me has always been "finding my niche." There are a few things I'm enthusiastic about and interacting with a select number of people who share those interests can actually be fun rather than draining.

Anonymous p-dawg March 23, 2016 10:46 PM  

@tz Uh, no. Not even close. Guess again. Or better yet, don't.

Blogger Cataline Sergius March 23, 2016 10:49 PM  

We definitely do live in a world of niches. In another ten years the world of mass media will be all but extinct. It's headed there fast enough as it is now. We already have the media Blurring Effect.

Blogger Austin Ballast March 23, 2016 11:07 PM  

Christians should never aim to be clones of each other, or even Jesus. Like is not exactly the same.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxETLTcv5BM

Blogger LP9 Forever Solidified in Gold! Rin Integra S.I.G. March 23, 2016 11:17 PM  

69 and our dear Stickwick, we are quiet or introverts not aloof or even distant, just quieter or lesser piqued by conflict. Perhaps our goals and priorities are similar to the worlds but still different from the world of dysfunction.

Milo's awesome, similar to other men around here, people dont get him, like Disturbed, misunderstood, mysterious to some very plain spoken and all highly valued for their resilience - the refusal to cry weakness.

Blogger LP9 Forever Solidified in Gold! Rin Integra S.I.G. March 23, 2016 11:18 PM  

CH is gonna rule the world!

Blogger KRW March 23, 2016 11:19 PM  

Was passing through Italy with the troops on my way to UAE....had some coffee. Real coffee. Just like...wow. Had it straight too. Tasted like crap...but like...wow.

Blogger Nick S March 23, 2016 11:25 PM  

That being said, paperwork is the bane of my existence. You have no idea how much paperwork is involved in running the Evil Legion of Evil.

A proper dark lord would have a paperwench.

Blogger KRW March 23, 2016 11:35 PM  

Nick S....Agreed. Vox just needs to do the paperwork...wait

Anonymous wildcard March 23, 2016 11:49 PM  

Happiness in relationships is determined by similarity. We naturally navigate conversation by looking for common ground, but the further your intelligence/mood/opinions/morals/interests/goals are from the other person, the more you will have to capitulate to achieve harmony/happiness, and at a certain point the compromise isn't worth the company.
For the superior, be that superiority in knowledge/skill/IQ/money/fame or anything else, the relationship/conversation holds less value (and even negative value accounting for opportunity cost) than solitary study. Of course there are circumstances of asymmetric value which are mutually beneficial, such as patron and artist, but those occurrences diminish exponentially as deviation from the mean increases, so that the best Advanced Squad Leader player in the world may literally have zero opponents worth his time(if we restrict his personal value system to that specific domain). If we don't, he'd be wise to accept a game with Donald J. Trump.

MAGA

Blogger Lazarus March 23, 2016 11:54 PM  

wildcard wrote:Happiness in relationships is determined by similarity. We naturally navigate conversation by looking for common ground, but the further your intelligence/mood/opinions/morals/interests/goals are from the other person, the more you will have to capitulate to achieve harmony/happiness, and at a certain point the compromise isn't worth the company.

If you are in a male/female relationship, do not expect it to last. Just sayin'

Blogger Lazarus March 24, 2016 12:07 AM  

Nick S wrote:A proper dark lord would have a paperwench.

1.He does not actually mean actual paper when he says "peperwork"
2. Supreme Dark Lords are loathe to delegate responsibility in certain areas.
3. Malwyn hands out badges, whippings, and kennelings, but is not good at the more mundane tasks, I would guess.

Blogger Lazarus March 24, 2016 12:08 AM  

peperwork = paperwork

peperwork sounds culinary.

Blogger Snidely Whiplash March 24, 2016 12:30 AM  

Lazarus wrote:If you are in a male/female relationship, do not expect it to last. Just sayin'
I dunno, we're at 36 years and still madly in love

Blogger KRW March 24, 2016 12:33 AM  

Malwyn hands out whippings? Uhm...what kind of whippings might those be? Just interested in a sort of...interested ...kind of way.

Blogger praetorian March 24, 2016 12:38 AM  

Tasted like crap...but like...wow.

I can see through time...

I dunno, we're at 36 years and still madly in love

Excellent.

Anonymous VFM 4388 March 24, 2016 2:07 AM  

More specifically, the quote "Be imitators of Christ" was specifically referring to Christ's humility in that he didn't think dying was beneath him even though he was God.

Bible verses are not blanket prescriptions. They have a context and a meaning within that context.

And no one seriously thinks that means that all Christians should dress like him or groom their body hair the same way. So even if we cut the Bible into fortune-cookie fortunes, clearly there are some points we are to imitate and some we are not.

Blogger James Dixon March 24, 2016 6:06 AM  

> Problem is, I can't call myself the Dark Lady of the Night

The Queen of Air and Darkness.

Blogger tz March 24, 2016 6:41 AM  

@66 true.
Our niche ought to consist of our virtues, not our vices.
I thought the same thing about Scalzi - his gamma traits are part of his niche.
Most vices are immoderate virtues, so diplomacy becomes whining, but assertiveness becomes arrogance.
The single person we need to be true to is God, not ourselves. We are told of our corruption, wickedness, and even imperfection.
In my own case I didn't accept that being out of shape was my "niche". I already lost weight, and am now at the Gym for an hour daily and rapidly fixing it. And I'm more effective for it, but even if it was the opposite, and it was and is when I push too hard, I should do it because it is the right thing. There is very little I do that requires strength, endurance, or flexibility, but it is better to have them than not.
Faults and vices - sinful behavior - at a minimum need to be admitted as such, not excused or dismissed.
Weak virtues need to be strengthened.
Goals need to be clarified, often they are discarded because something in the process of reaching them becomes the goal itself, or some obstacle becomes an opportunity for Lotus Eating.
There is always the temptation to believe God wants us the way we are instead of imaging Christ more closely.
We are either ascending toward the highest heaven or descending into the lowest hell daily, and pulling others with us. It is always tempting to confuse worldly success with Godliness, but along with the Flesh and the Devil it is an enemy.
Today we celebrate the Lords Supper, and tomorrow the price paid for our redemption and power to overcome these three enemies as well as sin and death.
If our faith isn't futile we will nail the evil within us to the cross and go and let that die with Christ - John 11:16

Blogger James Dixon March 24, 2016 8:04 AM  

This brings to mind high school and how the teachers were would routinely ask us what we wanted to change about ourselves. They never understood when I just gave them a blank look.

Blogger The Kurgan March 24, 2016 8:46 AM  

Amen.
By luck, coincidence or divine guidance I find myself in a situation where my natural talents are being stretched to the max. It is trying but glorious.
My happiness is heavily curbed by one issue, but other than that, there really is no better feeling than taking to the field without any fear, and only the sense of guiding purpose God gives us.

Blogger LP9 Forever Solidified in Gold! Rin Integra S.I.G. March 24, 2016 8:46 AM  

I miss Eco.

Anonymous RedJack March 24, 2016 9:50 AM  

It really depends. "Be yourself" isn't great advice, because we are all fallen. If I followed my inclinations, I would be in a Supermax prison by now. However, you can't force yourself to live a lie either. I know of a celibate gay man who is a committed Christian. He has chosen not to deny his SSA, but because of his faith he will not act on it. He is much more content than many I know.

I also know of those who try to be "perfect" and go insane. Know yourself, know your role, and find a way to express both.

Blogger Stephen T. McCarthy March 24, 2016 10:05 AM  

I think Bobby Darin said it best:
“I ain't goin' your way; Get outta my way!”

~ D-FensDogG
'Loyal American Underground'

Blogger dc.sunsets March 24, 2016 10:28 AM  

@88 This brings to mind high school and how the teachers were would routinely ask us what we wanted to change about ourselves. They never understood when I just gave them a blank look.

As I see it, it's not about "changing myself," it's about reading the fine print in my owner's manual so I can take the most advantage of my features while avoiding abuse of any vulnerabilities.

I seek to always "use" myself better, so as to better meet my obligations and live my life best.

Blogger James Dixon March 24, 2016 10:58 AM  

> I seek to always "use" myself better, so as to better meet my obligations and live my life best.

Well; Blood, Sweat, and Tears said "All I ask of living is to have no chains on me." But that's not quite right. We all have chains on us. It would be more accurate to say "All I ask of living is to have only the chains I chose on me." it's a shame that doesn't fit the song.

Blogger LP9 Forever Solidified in Gold! Rin Integra S.I.G. March 24, 2016 11:59 AM  

Malwyn MIGHT hand out...bondage knots!!

Hey, I never ever dare challenged our dear Malwyn, SB or our kind genius host. Commenting is a privilege

I like that most the online world and offline assoc or mesner's know a genius in Vox and take note of the VFM.

Happiness is a place we often visit, we can rest Christs contentment.

68 Thank you, Easter blessings to everyone...

What pulled me back was the horror or how I am seen locally; food for sex or food for play house time? Uh-Huh, this was from a man whom is above the law, knows my poverty and wanted to test me and humiliate me, while it failed it still shook me.

Is this how I am viewed? Like a lower status woman hitting the wall of obvious age and decline, its ok, all I can do is ask for God's protection and acknowledge that the henhouse drama, hunger, whatever, isn't important.

Life is about the Lord and He will bring us up as we are and whom we are meant to be, its why the host and so many others are at peace at whom we are.

I ended my own land phone line to avoid the cretins and creeps that assault me, attempt to distract me and mock me - again no victimhood here just writing that...At times we must be adults of great restraint in cutting out the wrong contact yet still the calls I miss are replaced by email by fine Ilk yet I cannot have a landline because the danger the caller(s) want for me. I miss my REAL friends, miss skype (it wont load) calling dad as dad doesn't know to call me anymore, he's that sick.

I miss ECO, I wished my comments were better but its just what's going on.

Grace wins everytime.

Blogger L March 24, 2016 5:25 PM  

right on Vox!

Blogger The Overgrown Hobbit March 25, 2016 12:31 AM  

And at the end of the day that is why I enjoy reading both your blog and Mrs. Hoyt's. And why I support (with the usual caveats) both of your work.

Where the two of you are wrong, it's a bold error, made from false premises (and yes, I admit it's possible I might be the one who errs) with no mealy-mouthed havey-cavey. You have principles - although the logical extrapolation from your starting assumptions means they play out in different ways.

I'm only sorry when I read you shooting at one, another rather than our common foe. I wish the both of you well.

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