Monday, July 22, 2019

Mailvox: one giant leap for an omega

LE begins to apply his newfound knowledge of the socio-sexual hierarchy:
I'm a noob in this world. I believe I was an omega until one stream you said something angrily like, "just do what normal people do!" to another omega man. I got a haircut, trimmed my beard to stubble, and started wearing clothes that aren't sweats.

I walked past a house party in my neighborhood, Saturday, July 13th, and a woman yelled, "GQ!" I just kept walking thinking, obviously they aren't talking to me, but then the a second one screamed, "GQ come here!"

Although it went against my instinct of running home and torturing myself with remorse for eternity, I joined them. Long story short, one of them, a nurse, asked to use my phone, and she saved her number into it. Even if this relationship results in nothing more than a few text messages, I'm forever in your debt.

I wasted the first 30 years of my life as an antisocial pussy, and always thought of the term "carpe diem" as a load of shit. Now, I'm excited to seize every day. I was thinking about your and Owen's role in turning my formerly worthless life around, while listening to Dean Martin's Kick in the Head, and this stupid, simple line brought me to tears, "if this is just the beginning/ then my life is gonna be beautiful!" So I felt obligated to write, if only to let you know of my gratitude.
If you want to win, if you even want to score a point or two, you have to a) learn the rules and b) get in the game. Not necessarily in that order.

LE's instincts are all wrong, obviously, for whatever reason. But he understands this now, and he has a mind and a will that together are capable of overriding those erroneous instincts. And it appears he has better raw material with which to work than the average omega. Regardless, the key is this: if your normal patterns of behavior aren't working for you, then change them! Stop enviously sniping at the normal, functional people, stop listening to your fellow dysfunctionals, and start simply doing what the normal people do.

If it worked for him, it can work for you.

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Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother July 22, 2019 7:47 AM  

LE must clean up nice if throwing down two bits gets women to notice him. An obvious ploy, since what woman doesn't have a phone in her hand these days.

Blogger A rebel without a General July 22, 2019 7:49 AM  

If LE can do it so can I.

Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother July 22, 2019 7:51 AM  

I just tried to write "make it so" but I just couldn't do it. Just can't.

Blogger The Cooler July 22, 2019 8:04 AM  

Yeah... This story has the stink of toned-down, omega fantasy wafting off it. Like an Adam Sandler RomCom.

The principle is bang on, though, so I'll say it: Make it so!

Go get em, Tiger.

Blogger VD July 22, 2019 8:22 AM  

This story has the stink of toned-down, omega fantasy wafting off it.

At least we know it's not a gamma fantasy. In that case, he'd have told us that he first banged the nurse, then destroyed the jerk captain of his high school football team with one perfect bon mot in front of everyone and strutted off with the latter's hot blonde girlfriend as everyone cheered.

Blogger Shimshon July 22, 2019 8:38 AM  

@5 "Gamma nerd DOMINATES and OVERWHELMS Alpha quarterback (and his girlfriend) with ONE WORD."

Ben Shapiroo was good for someone, after all.

Blogger Whitecloak July 22, 2019 8:47 AM  

There's something wholesome about seeing an omega move forward.

Can't say the same about gammas. Almost feels like there's less work to be done to make a man out of an omega than a gamma. Less spite in the omega, perhaps.

Blogger Ominous Cowherd July 22, 2019 9:04 AM  

The Cooler wrote:Yeah... This story has the stink of toned-down, omega fantasy wafting off it.

He stopped looking like a creepy loser, and a random broad singled him out for a shit test? Maybe. He passed at least one shit test because ZFG, because past experience gave him zero hope or expectation? Plausible.

I know in hindsight I passed a bunch of those by accident.

Blogger Capital6 July 22, 2019 9:18 AM  

This story and the subsequent advice are spot on. Doing what normal people do is phenomenal information which doesn't require crazy life changes. Simple things such as keeping your mouth shut, dressing well enough and watching the newest movie release help out as well.

Omegas can punch above their weight class. Whether or not they can keep up is the challenge. Whether the story is fantasy or not doesn't change the fact that being socially oblivious can produce results every so often even if the results can't be maintained.

Blogger sammibandit July 22, 2019 9:30 AM  

Way to go, GQ.

Blogger Aeroschmidt July 22, 2019 9:31 AM  

The running instinct is real. It's still really awkward receiving unsolicited attention... This is after getting married and having a couple kids.

He's a delta.

Blogger Stg58/Animal Mother July 22, 2019 9:40 AM  

Unsolicited attention is my food of choice.

Blogger camcleat July 22, 2019 9:43 AM  

Capital6 wrote:This story and the subsequent advice are spot on. Doing what normal people do is phenomenal information which doesn't require crazy life changes.

Explains why there is so much effort to redefine "normal" to mean gays and trannies and more generally men acting like women: the redefining undermines the effectiveness of such important cultural connectedness.

Blogger Long Live The West July 22, 2019 9:47 AM  

The first step towards fixing a problem is acknowledging that it exists. Good for this guy. A lot of people have far more potential than they give themselves credit for, they just don't see/know how to use it.

This story sounds only slightly exageratted at most. Some people really don't get attention from women at all, (many of whom are omegas) so they find it almost shcoking when they make a change and they start receiving female attention. Even if it's something most people find small and are used to dealing with.

Blogger Avalanche July 22, 2019 10:21 AM  

BRAVO to LE, now known as GQ!

Blogger Avalanche July 22, 2019 10:29 AM  

@8 I found this book to be so valuable I actually bought copies for two men-friends who struggle with their women.

What Women Want When They Test Men: How To Decode Female Behavior, Pass A Woman's Tests, And Attract Women through Authenticity by Bruce Bryans

Amazing eye-opener for me after my decade+ of advising women and some men on relationships, and having been married for 17 years to a man who gracefully and effortlessly handled the shit tests I didn't even know I was throwing at him till I read this book.

There are many many tests women inflict unconsciously: this book provides solid advice for men on how to 'field and disarm' the tests we don't even know we're giving! Sure, we know when we do some of the -- but we do many others without even realizing it's a test!

Highly recommended!

Blogger Latigo3 July 22, 2019 11:46 AM  

Good for him, somewhere along the line each dude needs to figure this out.

Blogger Ransom Smith July 22, 2019 11:47 AM  

A lot of Omegas aren't as hopeless as they themselves, or people around them would have you believe.
A good shave, khakis, and an ironed shirt can really make a reject look regal.

Blogger Mark Stoval July 22, 2019 12:08 PM  

I am glad for LE and for VD also. Good to see that Vox has helped a man move toward a measure of normalcy --- and happiness someday.

It would be nice if some of the ilk helped out and offered advice to Omegas and even gammas over at Alpha Game or someplace else. I wish I could help but work and health prevent me from doing much but offering an opinion once in a while.

Also, I can see omega and gamma behavior as Vox describes it, but I still don't understand the behavior. How people get like that still eludes me somehow.

Blogger Haus frau July 22, 2019 12:23 PM  

"How people get like that still eludes me somehow."

A mix of natural disposition and poor parenting, weak, uninvolved fathers especially.

Blogger Wazdakka July 22, 2019 12:28 PM  

Good luck LE. I pray for your future. May it be filled with the laughter and cries of children.

Blogger rumpole5 July 22, 2019 1:15 PM  

"How people get like that still eludes me somehow."

I think both the gamma and omega, as

insightfully described by VD, describe a

"personality disorder" as described by the

Diagnostic and Statistical Manual,

currently in its 5th Edition:

Pervasive instability of social relationships, self-image, and emotions; marked impulsivity beginning in early adulthood and present in at least five of the following contexts:

• Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment, reflecting intolerance to be alone

• Unstable and intense relationships marked by abrupt and extreme shifts between idealization and devaluation

* Identity disturbance, seen in an unstable self-image or sense of self

• Impulsivity that is potentially self-damaging in at least two of the following areas—spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating

• Recurrent suicidal gestures or threats, or self-mutilation

• Marked mood reactivity

• Chronic feelings of emptiness

• Frequent displays of inappropriate or intense anger

• Stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms.

These folks are most probably born with these tendencies, which are then aggravated as they grow up, by our currently screwed up societal and cultural practices and norms.

Blogger Bird on a Wing July 22, 2019 1:33 PM  

Carpe diem, indeed!

I find it also important to hear sometimes:

It's not as bad as you think!

Blogger Doktor Jeep July 22, 2019 1:48 PM  

Good things happen when you shower.

I think Omegas are suffering some kind of mental illness. Whether they are mentally ill from being an Omega, or they were mentally ill first, I would answer that with "yes".
Oh here's the death spiral: it does not matter really because one condition feeds the other.

What's important about this thing regarding changing behavior is that older Omegas like myself, who would get bullied by multiple peers at the same time - evidently no dishonor in dogpiling a complete loser as it's probably some genetic thing to clean the gene pool - learned through beatings and grief to at least ACT normal.
Being dogpiled was not really a problem, I learned how to deal with multiple opponents and avoid getting knocked down, and this was during school when nobody wanted to get into really big trouble for putting someone else in the hospital.
It was when one of them would spend weeks pretending to be my friend, the lure me to one of the others' house or yard on the pretext of a party or playing Atari, then I would get attacked. Then there was that one time they wanted to stop by my place and trashed my room. This was all during the rise of the latchkey kids so nobody knew and few cared and my silent generation parents never caught on. It was unnerving because this sort of thing escalates.

Fun times.

From morning to night, even now, I'm an actor. In basic training I used to get in trouble for not being afraid enough of the drill sergeants because they were acting too and I could feel it.

I had one friend who was an alpha and PUA before anybody put the terms - in modern contexts - to paper or internet and learned to be a wingman.

An Omega who knows how to act and takes showers will get more sex than a gamma.

Because once an Omega learns how to act just to survive, everything else is game time.

I should point out the importance of facets, as Vox brings up. My dad had facets: a bravo at work, but not a yes man. I seen him wreck fake alphas and people who got into position over him by nepotism or grift. As a dad, Delta to the max. Never missed day of work or left a bill unpaid. Personally? Alpha. Had mistresses, scars on his face from getting into fights. The whole bit.

Me, I learned to be a bravo or beta at work because it does help keep jobs but I don't tie my wagon to bad leadership or give my effort and loyalty to titles alone. In my personal life I'm so Omega I could steel a line from Fury Road: I do run from both the living and the dead, but the "dead" are not dramatic flashbacks or ghosts, just horrible memories that always feel as new as yesterday.
Once a month I do volunteer work as a gun instructor and if you are not in charge doing that stuff, something dumb and dangerous is going to happen.

You see all that notion of "character building", that the ((media)) programmed my generation to think was "gay" or make fun of it? Well it's real. Even a gamma can benefit from character building. That's what it was all for.

But notably we have probably 2 generations with not only ZERO character building, but the entire opposite of it. That's what all the PC/SJW/hate men is all about really. And it shows.

Blogger cyrus83 July 22, 2019 2:03 PM  

It doesn't need to be complicated. Among other normal things, beer night with folks at church. That's worked better in 3 months than 10 years of only socializing with people at work.

Blogger Capital6 July 22, 2019 2:52 PM  

Mike Stovak and Haus frau,

Abuse is a causal factor. Lack of fatherhood is a contributing or exacerbating factor. The development of omega behavior patterns help the child survive. The responses (magnitude of response and positive/negative direction of the response) of authority to a child's actions fosters and stengthens these patterns. In simplest terms the child behaves in a way to maximize gratification and minimize agony. If hiding in your room playing WoW all day gains you praise or keeps you from being berated and beaten you'll do that. This develops the distorted mental and behavior patterns exhibited by omegas.

If you had a normal childhood you may not be able to contemplate otherwise the same way an omega can't understand a normal childhood.

Helping omegas is often a fool's game. They usually have a choice. Whether or not they realize they have a choice is another matter. Whether the pain of change outweighs the pain of staying the same is another. Short version, omegas need to want to change and the help to change in order to change. That said, sometimes what an omega picks up while being unwilling to change bubbles to the surface when the omega does decide to undergo change. That can make a huge difference months or years down the line.

Blogger Doktor Jeep July 22, 2019 3:29 PM  

Yes there is no helping an Omega. Especially from an "educating" approach.
If you say to an Omega something like "if you work real hard you can be a Delta" it will sound like a boomer bootstrap speech.

Blogger Capital6 July 22, 2019 4:18 PM  

An omega may only realize and be grateful for your educating months and/or years later even without communication.

An omega's obliviousness combines with an omega's lack of understanding (usually from no/little exposure to differences) to form something resistant to change.

Then, maybe, one day, "Eureka!" The omega gets it.

Blogger Ominous Cowherd July 22, 2019 4:28 PM  

Doktor Jeep wrote:If you say to an Omega something like "if you work real hard you can be a Delta" it will sound like a boomer bootstrap speech.

How about this one: What you're doing doesn't work. Do something different.

That's the line that started this thread.

Blogger HouellebecqGurl July 22, 2019 5:16 PM  

Women want to control men. Tell them no.

There, I saved you the trouble of reading it and the $$ to buy it.

Blogger MichaelJMaier July 22, 2019 7:19 PM  

Doktor Jeep wrote:Yes there is no helping an Omega. Especially from an "educating" approach.

If you say to an Omega something like "if you work real hard you can be a Delta" it will sound like a boomer bootstrap speech.

You're wrong.

I cannot yet say why, but you are.

Blogger Doktor Jeep July 22, 2019 7:44 PM  

Omegas are degenerates, but not in a sodomite/LGBT way. They are degenerates in that they are capable of living abnormally and to some extent thriving in it. Hence the use of this word against that which is normal and sustainable. This is not a plus. Without monastic approaches to life they end up living in squalor or filth or even worse, become professional speed runners.

Blogger Dire Badger July 23, 2019 12:03 AM  

That's why I tell Guys that the whole "Be Yourself" shtick is a load of crap.

Yourself is a stupid dick, almost universally.

Not being a stupid dick takes real thought, sometimes.

Blogger AntiPepe Groyper July 23, 2019 7:56 AM  

Are aspie and NT omegas under the same umbrella?

Blogger SirHamster July 23, 2019 3:02 PM  

AntiPepe Groyper wrote:Are aspie and NT omegas under the same umbrella?

Omega is the bin for all the social rejects who live outside the hierarchy. So yes.

Blogger stephen cooper July 23, 2019 9:47 PM  

Dire Badger -

well yeah.

Tell us something we don't know.

Blogger stephen cooper July 23, 2019 10:48 PM  

Dire Badger -

thanks for the laugh ....

your comment was something worth pondering

I mean I did not have to ponder it I knew what you were saying

Blogger John Best. July 26, 2019 7:26 PM  

Yep, same thing has happened to me. I have people wanting to interact with me now and girls I have wanted for years like me now. Its all rather amusing.

@24 totally true.

Omega's biggest problem is anger, I have gone from being angry all the time to having no anger. Things which used to cripple me, now just go straight through me and out the other side. It is actually become a problem, I process my emotions and social interactions too quickly now, so I have to keep things to learn from.

@22 It is the cycle of sadness, Omega's and Gamma's are stuck in the anger cul de sac of the cycle of sadness. The cycle being calmness-sadness-fear-anger-numbness. Omega's natural disposition is anger and numbness, the Gamma's natural disposition is anger and fear. So what both the Omega and Gamma need to do is process their anger, then they can fear with the fear and numbness. Anger feels great much better than numbness or fear, but it can only lead to numbness and fear.

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